Women With Penises...And The Lesbians Who Love Them

                Riley J. Dennis, who was born Justin Dennis, is a self-described “queer, trans, non-binary lesbian” who also identifies as a feminist. (How can one be a self-proclaimed lesbian and non-binary? One would then have to be either just a part-time lesbian or part-time non-binary, would one not?) Recently, via a six minute you-tube video, she posed that age-old question, “Are genital preferences trans-phobic?”

                Riley begins: “Some people are making the argument that it’s not cissexist at all to only be attracted to people with one kind of genitals. For example, these people might argue that being attracted to only women with vaginas in no way negatively affects trans people. On the other hand, I would argue that it’s more complicated than that. We all have our implicit biases built into our preferences, and gender isn’t as simple as just the genitals you have.”

                I have a question for you, Ms. Dennis: How can our biases possibly be “implicit” and “built in,” but not our sex? And, “…as simple as the genitals you have,” makes it sound as if we could just pick up whatever ones we want at Costco. “Sorry, Barb, I don’t have a penis right now, but let me run to the store, I think they’re running a BOGO on genitals this week.”

                Riley rambles on: “If you’re a woman who only likes women, go ahead, identify as a lesbian, but some women have penises. And if the fact that some lesbians might be attracted to those women offends you, it’s because you don’t think trans women are real women.”

                No shit, Sherlock. Thanks for clearing that one up for me. And, by-the-way, no woman has a penis. And, any woman attracted to those folks sporting a real, live penis is not a lesbian, just as those who have a penis aren’t women. By definition. We have definitions so that it is possible to  communicate concepts and ideas, distinguishing us, penis or vagina owners, from rocks, plants or amoebas.

                “She” then states: “I’m trying to show that preferences for women with vaginas over women with penises might be partially informed by the influence of a cissexist society.”

                No, it’s probably the same reason gay men have a preference for partners with penises rather than vaginas. Or maybe that’s why we call them gay. It’s so hard to tell anymore in this cissexist society!

Tyrannosaurus Rex: Sensitive Lover?

                Size doesn’t matter. Or maybe it does. If someone says you’re a dinosaur in bed, that might not be a bad thing. According to a new study, Tyrannosaurus Rex may actually have been a “sensitive” lover.

                This bizarre new theory was spawned in large part by the discovery of a new member of the tyrannosaur family, Daspletosaurus horneri, or “Horner’s frightful lizard.” Unusually well-preserved fossils of the beast, which lived approximately 74 million years ago and was somewhat smaller than T. Rex, were recently discovered in Montana. The most striking aspect of the discovery was the animals “face.” After analyzing the find, scientists now believe the dinosaur and other tyrannosaurs- including mighty T. rex- wore a mask of large, flat scales, with regions of tough and protective armor-like skin around the snout and jaws. They further believe that the hard surface around the snout contained a great many “foramina,” or small nerve endings, essentially turning the dinosaur’s face into a remarkably sensitive “third hand.”

                Professor Jayc Sedimayr of Louisiana State University, the study’s co-author, stated that the animal’s snoot harbored “a complex sensory web.”

                Indeed, experts aver that T. rex used its tactile and sensuous schnoz to investigate its surroundings, build nests, delicately pick up fragile eggs, and, probably, to turn itself and its partners on.       

                In the journal Scientific Reports, the researchers wrote: “In courtship, tyrannosaurids might have rubbed their sensitive faces together as a vital part of pre-copulatory play.”

                So, the fearsome, 20-foot-tall carnivore with the bulky body and 9-inch-long teeth likely spent much of its time roaming around trying to get its muzzle nuzzled? The ferocious fossil engaged in “pre-copulatory play?” Who knew? Surely the sensuous, saucy, fore-play loving lizard and its passionate proboscis should be featured in a romance novel or maybe even an adult film, no?

                “My, what a big nose you have…”

                “The better to _______ you with!”

                Coming Soon: “Jurassic Park: After Dark”

Michael Moore: Trump To Thank For Coming Extinction Of Human Life On Earth

            His Rotundity, Michael Moore, recently tweeted: “Historians in the near future will mark today, March 28, 2017, as the day the extinction of human life on earth began, thanks 2 Donald Trump.” How are they going to do that if humans are extinct, Mike? Are scientists not human?

Or will we not actually be extinct yet, and they’ll just be guessing? That’s not very scientific, is it? The vile pile of bile sent out a follow-up tweet stating: “Trump has signed orders killing all of Obama’s climate change regulations. The EPA is prohibited henceforth from focusing on climate change.”

Well, that’s not exactly true, but Moore has never let objectivity cloud his lack of judgement. I’m actually surprised that, even in full pout mode, he limited the coming Trump-induced extinction to humans. He probably meant “Life on earth,” rather than “human life on earth,” but misspoke.

It’s a damn good thing leftist loonies like Moore and Al Gore aren’t paid prognosticators. Although, come to think of it, in a sense they are. Some people continue to pay attention to them- even purchasing their books or tickets to their movies, despite the abysmal track record of their prognoses- instead of treating them as the pathetic, pedantic, prevaricating, pseudo-prophets of doom that they are.

Trump may actually have a hand in preventing the devastation of human life on earth, depending on how he deals with madmen such as Kim Jong-un and the Iranian mullahs. But the Prince of Grease can’t be bothered with trivial things like North Korea’s “Dear Leader” threatening to unleash a nuclear holocaust on the U.S., or Iran threatening to destroy the “Great Satan” and wipe Israel off the face of the earth. He’s too upset at Trump “killing” Obama’s climate change regulations, mandates that even many devout believers in man-caused climate change admit will do essentially nothing to change the trajectory of what they believe is occurring.

The extinction of human logic and reason has begun. In earnest. And that, not Donald Trump, could very well lead to our demise.

Trans-specied Rights: The Next Big "Social Justice" Movement

                          The College Call-Out    (Vol. 48, #12, April 3, 2017)

                          “Inspiring news you can use,” courtesy of your local institution of higher learning!

                Harry Bison (aka ‘horny’) was incorrectly assigned a female sex and a human identity at birth. He lived as such until he was 19, knowing all-the-while he was living a lie. His parents even dressed him in panties and skirts for a time, until Harry (then known as ‘Tiffany’) rebelled and started wearing men’s jeans and leather shirts. Harry, who had always felt more at home on the range, came out as a male American buffalo on his 18^th birthday, and says it was the most liberating experience of his life. Born in Boston, he eventually moved to Wyoming where he purchased a small cabin southwest of Casper. Harry owns a lawn service company and a few head of cattle and helps support himself by writing cheesy bromides for the Hallmark Cards Company.

                Harry is also a pioneer in advocating for the rights of those who have historically been the victims of misspecieing, a form of prejudice- deliberate or accidental- whereby another being simply, arbitrarily, attributes a species to someone that is incorrect/does not align with their species identity.

                 Harry has been lobbying congress to formally recognize and declare a “Trans Day,” possibly falling on the vernal or autumnal equinox, which would be a celebration of trans-capitalists, the trans-gendered, trans-logical, and trans-specied. Asked if he would also lobby for the rights of those who are trans-trans, beings who have decided to transition back to the way God made them, Harry replied, “F--k no, they are one weird group, dude. That’s sick!”

                                              *******************************************

                The College Call-Out is a print and online news-magazine published by a consortium of major American colleges and universities, dedicated to eradicating all discrimination based on race, creed, ethnicity, religion, sex, gender, sexual orientation, age, belief systems, morality, reality and species. 

                                                 “Species conformity is a deformity!”

                

It's No Wonder They're Gay

                 A terrible inequality has cast an ominous shadow over the fruited plain, yet no one will speak of it: a large and growing gap between the wages of homosexuals and heterosexuals. According to Money magazine, comprehensive data released by the United States Treasury Department in September of 2016 revealed that gay couples earn an average of $63,000 more per year than straight couples do. Lesbian pairs received $11,000 more annually than those in traditional male-female marriages. (For that matter, single lesbians, on average, are paid significantly more than single heterosexual women).

                Where is the outcry? Why isn’t the mainstream media filled with tragic stories of plucky straight folks trying to survive against overwhelming discrimination?

                Experts believe there are two main reasons for the gulf in incomes between homosexual and heterosexual working couples. First, far fewer gay couples have kids. Propagation of the species necessarily demands one partner take a leave from work, and sometimes even- at least temporarily- work only part time. Secondly, they say, a high percentage of gays and lesbians reside in major cities along the coasts, where incomes tend to be significantly higher than in the more rural areas of flyover country.

                Nice try, experts, but that doesn’t cover up the very real and pernicious discrimination that’s truly behind this heinous and intolerable injustice.

                My fellow heterosexuals, we must bridge the gay-straight wage gap. I have a dream that our children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by their sexual orientation but by the content of their character! I have a dream today. We must permanently penetrate the “sass ceiling!”

                “What do we want?”

                “Gay pay!”

                “When do we want it?”

                “Now!”

                 

                "What do we want?"

                "Gay pay!"

                "When do we want it?"

                "Now!"

                “Hey, hey, ho, ho, the gay-straight pay gap’s got to go! Hey, hey, ho, ho…”

Australia Addressing Sexist Traffic Lights

                Australia is trying to combat sexism by making its traffic lights more progressive. Officials from Down Under announced the change on International Women’s Day, stating that it was an attempt at combating “unconscious bias.”

                What have they done? They’ve installed pedestrian traffic lights exhibiting female figures rather than the old, fuddy-duddy male ones, in an attempt to redress a social “stereotype that we may have about certain groups of people, which we don’t even realize we hold,” according to Fox News.

                The land of emus and outbacks hopes to achieve an equal number of “male” and “female” traffic lights, but I, for one, think they’ve gone about it in a hopelessly conservative- if not reactionary- way. These female figures are depicted in a dress. The Patriarchy always wants to place women in dresses or skirts in order to objectify them. How about portraying them in a nice pantsuit for once, alá Hillary Clinton?! Nobody, even her husband Bill, objectifies her. And, speaking of Hillary, what about lesbians and the gender-fluid? Can’t they be portrayed on these traffic lights with strap-ons or with the half-dress, half-pants transgendered symbol?

                I mean, technology is such that we should easily be able to clearly depict symbols for other traditionally under-represented groups like the poly-amorous, pedophiles, and those into bestiality…just for starters. We haven’t even scratched the surface of tolerance and inclusivity as it pertains to traffic lights. Certainly the “Walk,” and “Don’t Walk” directional verbiage on semaphores could be broader, more inclusive and more exciting. Perhaps commands like “Prance,” “Don’t Prance,” and “Pedestrians Choice” would be more fun and inclusive!  

                

Republicans Embarrass Themselves With Health Care Fiasco

                Snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. If you’re a Republican, that’s what you do. Must be in their blood. They could not repeal, and do not appeal.

                After repeatedly promising to repeal Obamacare, then taking control of the House, Senate and presidency, the GOP somehow managed to drop the ball yet again, getting outmaneuvered by both Democrats and themselves. The American Health Care Act, or RINOcare, was essentially Obamacare Lite, and would not have repealed certain vital- and odious- aspects of the laughably-dubbed “Affordable Care Act.” It would have left Uncle Sam’s nose firmly and permanently stuck in every aspect of American’s health and behavior.

                That said, one would think that Republicans would have met and hammered out a viable plan, one they knew would pass, long before they were to vote on one. In that case, had the Democrats attempted to kill the bill by filibustering it, they would’ve ended up with a black eye, not the Republicans. This fiasco will of course be used by progressives to hammer Republicans and Conservatives, and will lead to insistent, boisterous claims that they are unable to govern effectively. A claim that, in this case, is understandable. It will also lead to former president Obama gloating insufferably, something at which he is very good. Worst of all, it is yet another instance of Republicans making promises to voters that they don’t keep while in office. That is dangerous to a free Republic.

                In reality, this shows that the diversity of viewpoints is on the Republican side, and that at least some of them actually care more about crafting legislation than the Democrats, who universally will do whatever it takes to keep and retain power, period. Ironically, though, this does make it harder for them to govern effectively.

                As Ronald Reagan remarked, “The closest thing to eternal life on earth is a government program.” The GOP allowed debate over the bill to be framed simply by how many people would gain or lose health care. This implies that everybody should have health care. And, in the seven years since Obamacare was made the law of the land, many now feel that universal healthcare is an entitlement, or even a fundamental right.

                A few lines from Samuel Taylor Coleridge seem especially appropriate here:

                He went like one that hath been stunned,

                And is of sense forlorn:

                A sadder and a wiser man,

                He rose the morrow morn.

                

Trump Practices Devil Worship

All the news           The New York Times                       

That’s fit to print                                      Wednesday, March 29, 2017

          Trump Practices Devil Worship!

                 Washington, D.C.—President Donald J. Trump shocked and appalled Democrats and Republicans alike in this city earlier today when he averred that he loves the Devils. Even some of his biggest detractors were taken aback with the president’s open Devil worship. The hullabaloo stems from yet another careless, over-the-top, Trump tweet in which he expressed his great fondness for the New Jersey Devils professional hockey team: “I’m a New York guy, but always loved the Devils. I’m sure New Yorkers and Washingtonians alike will hate this. Can’t betray my guys, though. Love right wing Devante Smith-Pelly. Same for goaltender Corey Schneider. Prudential Center is okay, too. Go Devils! Sucks they’ll miss the play-offs this year. We need to make @New Jersey Devils great again! MNJDGA! Gonna order some hats soon!” Understandably, after such a shocking statement, recriminations came hard and fast. MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow said that the president should be burned at the stake. Many major newspapers have called on the president to resign. Nancy Pelosi stated: “I’ve always suspected President Bush was a Devil-worshipper!” Lena Dunham, however, commented: “I have to grudgingly admit, this makes me respect him…a little bit.” The New York Times? Well, we’ll take the high road, as always, and just remind the pudgy, illegitimate Commander-in-Chief that the Rangers will make the play-offs this year.

The University Of Arizona Offers Tips On Dealing With Microaggressions!

                The University of Arizona recently distributed a 20-page booklet recommending to faculty that when a student feels “victimized” by a “microaggression” the appropriate response should be to say “ouch.” And the correct response from the offender should be to say “oops.”

                Why not, “I’m rubber, you’re glue, whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you!” and “nuh-uh,” respectively? It would be cleverer than the booklets suggestions.

                The sage advice just keeps leaping from the truncated treatise’s pages: “If necessary, there can be further dialogue about this exchange.” Dialogue?! The easily offended young scholars will be regular Shakespeares in no time! I’d hate to hear the school’s debate team in action:

                “Is not!”

                “Is!”

                “Is not!”

                One certainly gets good bang for one’s educational buck at the U of A! Why, the booklet even offers a definition of microagressions, stating that they are “the everyday verbal, nonverbal, and environmental slights, snubs or insults, whether intentional or unintentional, that communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative messages to target persons based solely upon their marginalized group membership.”

                First off, how do you slight, snub or insult somebody environmentally?

                “This orange wallpaper is hideous, don’t you think?”

                “Are you kidding, it’s to die for. Ouch!”

                Or perhaps, “This stupid tree has dripped sap all over my bike”

                “Oh…my…God. I mean, OMG! We couldn’t breathe without trees, dude. In fact, I can’t breathe now! Ouch!”

                Secondly, whatever happened to the melting pot, to all of us just being Americans? No one is an American anymore, we are all a member of some supposedly marginalized sub-group. We should all take offense at that.

                All you pathetic, entitled, fragile, paranoid, leftist sheep can take your perceived microaggressions and shove them up your little snowflake asses.

                Ouch?

                Oops.

Humans Surrendering Willingly

                People in Western societies are voluntarily giving up their distinctive and once-cherished freedom- and independence- that countless millions have died to attain, preserve, and defend for hundreds of years. We are blindly forfeiting our cultural inheritance, eschewing our good fortune, abandoning our Judeo-Christian values, surrendering our autonomy, and relinquishing our very humanity.

                Surely this is an exaggeration, you say. This must be a bit of hyperbole brought on by a bout of hysteria. Sadly, it is not.

                As we talk about robots taking our jobs, we speculate on the “singularity,” that moment when artificial intelligence surpasses our own. To say that there is no consensus amongst experts as to what will happen from that time forward is an understatement. Some believe it will be a good thing, some a disaster. More than a few believe we may end up as useless, outmoded slaves of these AI robots.

                Yet, apparently, many of us will soon want to marry them. The incredibly quick advancement in stunningly real looking, feeling and sounding “sex-bots,” that may be programmable, and can talk, flirt and perform a panoply of other bodily functions, combined with equally rapidly changing social mores, has many experts convinced that robot-human marriage will be commonplace by 2050. As if our birth rate in the West wasn’t low enough already, with gay-marriage legalized, contraceptives paid for by others (birth control oddly enough considered a birth-right), the ubiquitousness of masturbation and pornography, and the emerging refusal to recognize any difference between the sexes.

                For many in western nations, driving has been considered a necessity, a privilege, a sport and a way to leave your troubles behind while taking control of an exquisite machine. In the United States, it has been nothing less than the physical manifestation of our freedoms. Hitting the open road, man putting machine through its paces, and traversing the vast expanses and varying terrains of the fruited plain have been rights-of-passage from generation to generation. The staggering number of “roadside attractions’ and “drive-through/drive-in” restaurants are a testament to this reality. But now we are about to cede control of our travel to driverless and “autonomous” vehicles. “How wonderful!” roar the experts, “now we can get rid of many parking ramps, lots, garages, and the like, and make more room for pedestrians, bikers and nature lovers. And no one will actually need to own a car. There will be fleets on demand and it will be a much more efficient way to move people around!”

                Urban planners envision a day when everyone is housed, like urban sheep, in high-density developments in the city proper, and the “sprawling” suburbs of individual homes, three-car garages, and fenced in yards are no more. You won’t need to own a car, you’ll just call for one when you need it. Get it? More control for the planners, less control for us. Autonomous cars, dependent people. (There is no way I am giving up my ability to drive my own vehicle to wherever the hell I damn well please, whenever the hell I damn well please, without one hell of a fight. Just sayin’).

                For now our cars are going to be spying on us every second we are driving them, watching to see if we accelerate or brake too quickly, go over the speed limit, are on the phone, have beer on our breath, are listening to talk radio or are wearing clothes that clash. But every device spies on us now, from our computers and televisions, to our smartphones and vehicles. Even some of our mattresses have started recording our bedroom activities. (See my post, “Spanish Mattress To Act As Private Eye; 4/28/2016). We enjoy less freedom, privacy and dignity every day.

                Our leaders want to make us accountable to a one-world government. It is inevitable, they say. But a one-world government means a one-world bureaucracy. It necessarily means less freedom, choice and even “diversity” for its citizens. There is an existential reason for republicanism. It affords the governed the most freedom. It is “pro-choice” government by, of and for, the people. If one state/nation enacts a 90% tax rate or legalizes the killing of Jews, for example, I can move to another state/nation. One-world government?! What could go wrong?

                Moreover, Christianity is dying off in Europe and America, with its Judeo-Christian values that are the foundation of a free, vibrant, prosperous society based on natural rights and the rule of law. The massive influx of Muslims into these nations is combining with their low native birthrates and declining observance of Christianity to raise the possibility that Sharia Law may someday replace their constitutions as the laws of their lands, eviscerating freedoms and returning them to the dark ages.

                As if all of this weren’t enough, there are fewer and fewer workers laboring to pay for the ever increasing number of folks who can’t- or choose not to- work. Euphemistically branded “entitlement” spending is causing both those who are forced to give up their income- and those who receive income from those others- to surrender their freedom. When government arbitrarily seizes whatever percentage of the fruits of some of its citizen’s labor that it wants to, and tosses it at other citizens feet, it removes the incentive for both groups to be gainfully employed, and essentially relegates the latter group- and its descendants- to the level of livestock. Make no mistake, this is utterly unsustainable. Period.

                All of these things are eminently, easily fixable. But we won’t fix them. Because we have become too soft, too deluded, too compliant, too corrupt, and too cowed by political correctness to save ourselves. And too tolerant of those staggeringly intolerant leftists proclaiming that those who don’t believe tolerance is the highest virtue cannot be tolerated.

                We in the West are embarked on the largest mass-suicide and voluntary, eventual self-extinction in world history.

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                Please share this with your friends and families, and anyone else who is receptive to saving Western culture…and humanity.