Diane Paulus, a Harvard University theater professor, is directing a bold new interpretation of the classic musical “1776.” In this version, the cast will be entirely comprised of female, nonbinary, trans, and genderqueer individuals. “1776” started its Broadway run more than 50 years ago and was also made into a major motion picture in 1972. It focuses on the summer of ’76 when the Founding Fathers tirelessly debated whether or not to declare independence from Britain. Harvard’s American Repertory Theater website states that Paulus’s adaptation will reexamine “this pivotal moment in American history,” while featuring “multiple representations of gender, race, and ethnicity that allow this revival of 1776 to more broadly reflect today’s America, our America.” It further states, “As artists, we are embracing our American history as a human predicament and are committed to the process of learning from the past in order to move forward together.” American history as a “human predicament?” Translation: “We can overcome this nation’s straight, white, cis-male Christian heritage, overturn capitalism, and live happily ever after in a glorious Socialist LGBTQ Paradise free of religion and restraint, if only you all will follow our lead.”
I’m sure the American Repertory Theater, or ART as it’s known to the culturati, has a series of woke adaptions and re-imaginings of traditional Broadway shows planned for the future. I would expect to see shows titled “A Porous Line,” “Harry Poppins,” “Diddler on the Roof,” “Hello, Collie,” and “My Bare Lady” soon. Rumor has it a new production of “Cats” is in the works, too, with the whole cast made up of straight males in dog costumes. Moreover, an anonymous source close to ART tells me that the theater will also be adapting several classic motion pictures to the stage. The source says plans are already underway for an adaptation of 2001’s “Pearl Harbor,” featuring only non-binary, pansexual Albanians, and of the iconic John Wayne movie “El Dorado,” in which “the Duke” is played by RuPaul and the rest of the cast members are lesbian Chinese Satanists.
Critics have already gotten word of ART’s plans and have dubbed the upcoming productions “a more accurate representation of today’s reality,” a “much needed correction of problematic non-portrayals of marginalized populations and communities,” “delicious,” and “to die for.”