Monday, July 31, 2017

Polar Bears Threatened By Faster- Moving Sea Ice?

                According to a new study, “rapid global warming” is endangering polar bears because it is “speeding up the movement of sea ice off Alaska’s coasts.” U.S. Geological Survey research ecologist George Durner, lead author of said study, says that most sea ice moves throughout the year, requiring polar bears to continually walk to stay within their preferred habitat. He likened the bears plight to living on a treadmill that has picked up speed because ice is thinner, more brittle and moving faster due to wind and ocean currents. This begs the question, “W.T.F?!?”
                Just how fast does Dr. Durner think the sea ice is moving? It may be traveling at more than a “glacial” pace, but that isn’t saying much. Some sea ice is stable and essentially permanent, yet some floes naturally move with ocean currents. These floes are incredibly heavy and wind does not propel them at alarming speeds. Watch a bear walking on one of them, Dr. Durner, or watch a ship at rest on the sea. Contrary to what the U.S. Geo-illogical Survey would have us believe, the pale bears aren’t being unjustly conveyed as if on a moving sidewalk (“travellator” to you Brits) set at warp speed. “Hey, Bob, let’s go down to the shore and watch the polar bears whizzing by.” The Earth itself is spinning at an astoundingly rapid rate, over 1,000 miles-per-hour at the equator and more than 700 miles-per-hour where I’m currently standing, but my legs are becalmed. It would seem to be Dr. Durner’s logic that has become thinner and more brittle.
                By-the-way: polar bears were listed as threatened in 2008, and the “U.S. polar bear recovery plan” (kind of like the Marshall Plan for bruins) states that without action to address climate change—the primary cause of diminishing sea ice—it is unlikely that polar bears can be saved. This despite the fact that there were only about 10,000 of the animals alive in 1970 while current estimates put their numbers at between 20,000 and 25,000.
                Rapid global dumbing. I can’t bear it.


Sunday, July 30, 2017

Media Covering Up Wasserman Schultz Scandal

                The framestream media is currently busy suppressing a scandal of potentially momentous proportions, simply because it involves Democrats- and doesn’t involve President Trump.
                Imran Aman, a Pakistani-born man who, along with his wife and two brothers, had provided IT services to dozens of Democratic congressmen since 2004, was recently arrested by the FBI while attempting to flee the country and head back home to Pakistan. According to the Daily Caller, Awan, who was the top IT aide to former DNC chairman and current Democratic Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz, was detained at Dulles airport after wiring nearly $300,000 to Pakistan. The FBI has also reportedly seized numerous “smashed computer hard drives” from his home.
            Awan’s lawyer stated that his client was arrested for “working while Muslim.”
            The Caller reports: “Awan and members of his family received $4 million from the Democratic congressmen they were working for since 2010.” In fact, in March of 2016, eight Democratic members of the House Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence issued a letter demanding that these staffers be granted access to Top Secret Sensitive Compartmented Information (TS/SCI).
                Indeed, reports indicate that Wasserman Schultz entrusted Aman with her I-Pad password and other codes. Which is unfortunate, since Capitol Police revoked Awan’s access to the congressional IT system back in February of this year, in relation to a major security breach- after which most Democrats began severing ties with the Awans.
                Not Wasserman Schultz, however. Not only was she uncooperative with the probe into her staffers, she actually threatened the Capitol Police chief for having the unmitigated gall to gather evidence. When the chief refused to promptly return one of her laptops that had been set up and controlled by Awan, she told him: “You should expect that there will be consequences.”
                Why did Wasserman Schultz refuse to fire Awan until after his recent arrest? Why didn’t she let him go after the Capitol Police revoked his access to the congressional IT system back in February, as most of the other Democrats did? Why was she belligerent to the Capitol Police? We can guess, but we’ll likely never know. The media doesn’t want us to know.
                There is more to the story, however. Despite their exhaustive IT work for Democrats, including some on the Intelligence and Foreign Affairs Committee, the Awans somehow found the time to run a car dealership in Virginia, called Cars International A. CIA, get it? Who doesn’t like a Pakistani entrepreneur with a cheeky sense of humor?
                Despite the millions of dollars the congressmen paid them, and their car dealer operation, they were frequently short of cash and sought and accepted loans from various entities…including, oddly enough, Iraqi politician Ali al-Attar.
                So, to recap, here we have a powerful politician interfering in a federal investigation, threatening the chief of the Capitol Police, destroyed evidence, actual arrests, and a money trail leading to a foreign politician, all documented and known to be true.
                And no one cares. Or, correctly put, the vast media cover-up will prevent people from even getting the chance to care.
                Compare this to the incessant, ad hominem, around-the-clock, nauseatingly wall-to-wall coverage of the Trump-Russia (Possible) Collusion (Potential) Scandal. A full 24 hours after the Feds nabbed Awan, of the network news stations, only “CBS This Morning” had even mentioned it- and then for all of 37 seconds, ending the segment with the claim by Awan’s attorney that his client was only charged due to “anti-Muslim bigotry.” Here’s where I would normally insert the word “unbelievable,” but- tragically- nothing is unbelievable anymore.
A rare print media article on the should-be scandal, by the Associated Press, sported a headline reading: “Florida lawmaker fires IT staffer; Anti-Muslim bigotry is cause of client’s arrest, lawyer says.”

There you have it folks. The news, fair and balanced.

The charlatans in the lamestream media will keep the Trump-Russia pseudo-scandal on life support no matter what, even while aborting an actual, viable scandal at the first opportunity.
Collusion?  In a sane world, the collusion of media goliaths in their effort to protect their “progressive” friends- and take down Trump- should be the biggest scandal of all.


Saturday, July 29, 2017

Mainstream Media Mystified Over Trump, Putin Meeting At G-20 Summit

                The mainstream media, as evidenced by the Washington Post (“Our Hypocrisy Lies in Darkness”), was utterly gobsmacked that President Trump twice met with Russian president Vladimir Putin at the G-20 summit in Hamburg, Germany recently. This despite the fact that the G-20 summit is held specifically so that the leaders of these 20 nations with the largest economies can meet and discuss issues of international importance in an attempt to avoid misunderstandings- or worse.
                But that didn’t dissuade the media from giving blanket coverage to these obviously bizarre, furtive and sinister meetings of the two world leaders that took place at…the meeting of world leaders. It has recently come to light that, after Trump’s endlessly scrutinized original meeting with Putin at the summit, the two presidents met again- informally, yet- at a dinner for the G-20 attendees. Egads! Shouldn’t we have just gone to war with Russia to maintain our integrity?
                Oddly enough, the media didn’t care when President Obama made his famous pink panties remark to former Russian president Dmitry Medvedev, caught on what he thought was a switched-off microphone: “On all these issues, but particularly missile defense, this, this can be solved but it’s important for him to give me space,” Obama said in reference to Vladimir Putin. “This is my last election. After my election I have more flexibility.” Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. The media was completely untroubled by Obama’s cow-towing to- and collusion with- the Red Menace.
                The Washington Post article stated: “The encounter underscores the extent to which Trump was eager throughout the summit to cultivate a friendship with Putin. During last year’s campaign, Trump spoke admiringly of Putin and at times seemed captivated by him.” It went on to opine that the “newly disclosed conversation with Putin at the G-20 dinner is likely to stoke further criticism, including perhaps from some fellow Republicans in Congress, that he is too cozy with the leader of a major U.S. adversary.”
                It wasn’t long ago that the self-same media thought it was cute, or funny, or even touching, that Bill Clinton and Boris Yeltsin met, drank and yucked it up together on occasion.
                If the mainstream media was as thoroughly and blatantly in the tank for Republicans during World War II as it is for Democrats today, newspaper headlines would’ve screamed: “F.D.R. Meets With Stalin For Second Time At Yalta,” while the accompanying articles would speculate on the budding “bromance” between the American president and the murderous monster: “The newly disclosed- yet secretive- conversation between F.D.R. and Stalin at Yalta is likely to stoke further criticism, including perhaps from some fellow Democrats in Congress, that he is too cozy with the brutal dictator.”

Friday, July 28, 2017

Man Who Killed Step-Daughter, Raped Corpse, Upset With Divorce Settlement

                 A man who was convicted of killing his stepdaughter and having sex with her corpse is now challenging his divorce terms with her mother. Gregory Graf, 55, recently stated via a video feed from his Pennsylvania prison cell that he never agreed to terms that would give him 25% of the assets he shared with his wife.
                In February of 2017, Jack McMahon, Graf’s attorney, said that Graf was happy with the terms reached at the time. However, Graf now says he didn’t understand the information McMahon gave him: “I don’t know what is going on, I’m not a legal person.”

    No kidding.

                In 2014, Graf was convicted of fatally shooting his 33-year-old stepdaughter, and recording himself on video sexually abusing her corpse. McMahon defended his defense of the monster Graf by saying that “something snapped.” He added that the murder was not premeditated. Graf, who is currently serving a life sentence in prison, is being sued by his stepdaughter’s husband, who is seeking monetary damages for their three children.
                I have seen reports saying that Graf “slept with his stepdaughter’s corpse.” A corpse can no longer actually “sleep,” though Graf himself should be “sleeping with the fishes.” To call these crimes “heinous” is an understatement. How is it possible that a court would consider his case? In light of this, how is it possible that he can now attempt to negotiate what percentage of his shared marital assets he can retain?
               This is beyond sick. Beyond chilling.

   “Something snapped?” Something is broken in all of us if we no longer care to seriously address evil.

Thursday, July 27, 2017

Christianity Now A Hate Crime?

                Apparently, Christianity is now a hate crime according to GuideStar, which touts itself as a “neutral” database of information on more than two million charities. The supposedly “neutral” Guidestar, one of America’s leading charity research groups, has reportedly adopted the hard-left Southern Poverty Law Center’s nonprofit designations. Therefore, its profiles of Christian organizations such as the Family Research Council, the Alliance Defending Freedom, the Liberty Counsel, and the American Family Association, each may now sport a banner warning that they have been “flagged as a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center.”
                The charity analysis site cited “hateful rhetoric” at this “highly politicized moment” in American history as the reason for its decision to brand the groups this way, the Associated Press reported recently. What kind of “hateful rhetoric,” you ask? An unwavering support of traditional marriage.
Gasp! Rise up, enlightened members of The Resistance, and visit righteous death and destruction upon them all!
                So, Planned Parenthood’s heinous holocaust, its jaunty jihad against innocent babies, continues to be federally funded, even under the Trump administration, and the mainstream media still frequently refers to Islam as the “Religion of Peace,” but Christian organizations promoting traditional marriage are labeled “hate groups?”
                This Mother of All Hypocrisy almost makes one yearn for a tenth crusade.
                (Guidestar has removed the flags/labels designating the Christian entities as “hate groups” since I wrote this piece a couple of weeks ago. It said in a statement that its decision to do so was driven by its “commitment to objectivity” and concerns for its staff’s “wellbeing).”

Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Yankee Stadium Hosts BOGO Beer, Bathroom Night

Yankee Stadium
Friday, August 11, 2017
The Bronx

P.A. Announcer: “Welcome lad, er, everyone, to Yankee Stadium for tonight’s contest between your New York Yankees and the Boston Red Sox!”

Fans: “Boooooo…!”

P.A. Announcer: “Just a few housekeeping announcements before the first pitch. Please respect your neighbors, and please refrain from throwing anything on the field that could jeopardize the safety of the players.”

Fans: “Boooooo…!”

P.A. Announcer: “And remember, you’re in for a special treat this evening, and it’s a ‘twofer’! It’s BOGO Beer Night AND Transgender Bathroom Night here at Yankee Stadium. That’s right, through the seventh inning, fans who purchase one beer will get a second one of equal or lesser value…free! And all of you feel free to use any bathroom you choose tonight. It’s kind of like a bathroom BOGO, pay for one admission, but use either the men’s or the women’s restrooms! Enjoy the game…and let’s play ball!!”

Fans: “Yeaaaayyyyy!!!”

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Minnesota Department Of Education Approves New Transgender Toolkit

                A Minnesota Department of Education advisory council has approved a new “toolkit” for “Safe and Supportive Schools for Transgender and Gender Nonconforming Students.” The toolkit was approved by something called the School Safety Technical Assistance Council, and, though nonbinding, it strongly encourages schools to implement radical new policies in support of transgender and gender nonconforming students. The toolkit, which will be distributed to K-12 schools statewide, recommends that school officials ask before assuming a student’s name, gender identity or pronoun. It also states that schools should not exclude students from activities based on how they identify.
                Kindergartners literally don’t even know what a pronoun is, and can’t possibly have a sexual orientation, yet teachers are supposed to ask them what their “preferred” pronoun is- to use in conjunction with their “gender identity?”


                Moreover, the kit advises public schools to stop calling students “boys and girls,” and to start calling them “scholars” instead. It also has helpful, progressive guidelines for bathroom and locker room usage, as well as hotel room accommodations, should schools take their young scholars on road trips: students should be allowed to choose the restroom, locker room, or accommodation of their gender choice. If this policy makes any other students uncomfortable, the guidelines state, those students should be restricted to a single-use restroom, if available. The toolkit is going out to all public schools in Minnesota despite the fact that transgender people are estimated to comprise just 0.6% of the population (of the United States).
                Can you say, “insane?”
                If we can’t assume a student’s name, gender, or preferred pronoun, how can we assume anything else, either? What if a white student wants to be referred to as black? If that’s how he/she/ze/xir/whatever-the-hell identifies, who are we to refuse to comply? And why should we simply take it upon ourselves to arbitrarily assume the student is human? Or, if they so identify, that they are any particular age? Hmmm?
                This will be needlessly- and tragically- confusing, especially to the young grade-school students.
 States that implement this kind of “strongly suggested,” codified child-molestation should look for chaos to rule, and depression and suicide rates to soar among young people in the decades to come. 
But, on the lighter side, I can’t wait to see how the classic, formerly timeless “Dick and Jane” children’s book series evolves to meet the demands of today’s progressive educator class.
Or maybe they won’t have to evolve all that much. Here is a snippet from the website: “Millions of Americans remember Dick and Jane (and Sally and Spot, too!). Now Dick and Jane and all their pals are back with revised editions of these classic readers for a whole new generation of readers to enjoy!”
Perhaps Dick now identifies as Jane and Jane now identifies as Dick- and/or has one. Maybe Sally is now non-binary. And who knows what Spot might claim to be! The possibilities are endless! I myself am tempted to peruse these updated treasures for the beginning reader!
Here is an excerpt from the Penguin Young Readers Book 2, Dick and Jane- Fun with Dick and Jane: “Look, Jane,” said Dick. “Here is something funny. Can you guess what it is?”
And this from the Young Readers Book 4, Dick and Jane- Guess Who: “Guess who this is,” said Jane. “Guess who this is,” said Sally. “And see the two little ones. Guess who.”


Monday, July 24, 2017

New Parenting Trend Takes Instagram By Storm

                A new trend has been launched on Instagram, in order to combat “rape culture.” The trend? New mothers are asking their infants for “permission” to pick them up before actually doing so.
                According to, the trend began a few weeks ago after Nisha Moodley, mother of 6-month-old Raven, made an Instagram post featuring a selfie with her son and an explanation of her new parenting style, complete with an “endrapeculture” hashtag. Moodley claims to be able to “feel for his ‘yes’” after she politely asks him if she can hoist him up. (“Raven” is a he?).
                I have tried to “feel for her ‘yes’” on a number of occasions, but these were all adult women who were old enough to talk. Is this really a good idea when it comes to one’s infants? Should we also get an infant’s “permission” to feed them, change their diapers, give them medical care, or put them to bed? 
                Apparently so, according to Moodley: “Since the moment he was born, we’ve always asked before we pick him up. I always feel for his ‘yes.’ Why? Because we want him to know that his body is his, and that others’ bodies are theirs, and no one gets to make choices about someone else’s body.”
                Tell that to Planned Parenthood and the 300,000-plus mothers each year who abort their children. Please.
                Moodley, who also uses #lessonsinsovereignty and #bornfree   in her posts, added: “It always touches my heart when someone takes a moment to connect with him and says “Can I hold you, dude?”

                “Can I kill you, dude” doesn’t sound as sweet. 
                No less a luminary than “parenting expert” Sharon Silver avers that Moodley’s parenting methods are “correct,” according to Yahoo News. Silver told Yahoo: “This idea is part of the wonderful [‘Recourse of Infant Educarers’ (RIE)] parenting philosophy, which is essentially respecting a child’s timetable and allowing him or her to participate in the full range of experiences as the result of a decision. It’s the underlying premise of positive parenting.”
                The RIE website offers a new book titled: “Baby Knows Best.” I see. It wasn’t that long ago one of the top-rated television shows was called: “Father Knows Best.”
                It’s no wonder there are fewer and fewer fathers. And fewer and fewer babies.
    I guess it’s true: You’ve come a long way, baby.

    But you probably already knew that.  

    May I change your diaper? I'll "feel" for your "yes." 


Sunday, July 23, 2017

Colorado State University Reaches Agreement With Wrongly Accused Student

                Colorado State University-Pueblo student Grant Neal was granted some much overdue justice recently. Sort of. A court document filed July 14th by attorneys representing the university and the state attorney general says the school reached an agreement with Neal, whose federal lawsuit seeking damages from Colorado State University-Pueblo also was the first if its kind to name the Department of Education as a defendant.  The agreement, reached “on or about June 9,” dismisses all remaining claims against the university and its officials. “The agreement included monetary and a number of non-economic terms,” according to the status update filed in Colorado federal court.
                What was the reason for Neal’s lawsuit in the first place? Neal, at the time a talented sophomore fullback for the school’s football team, was suspended in December of 2015 after Jennifer DeLuna, the university’s “Director of Diversity and Inclusion,” concluded he had “engaged in non-consensual sexual intercourse” with athletic trainer and fellow student “Jane Doe.”
                Neal claimed in his lawsuit that investigators ignored exculpatory evidence, including the trainer’s own testimony, in which she flatly stated the sex was consensual.
                “Don’t listen to her, your honor! What would she know?”
                In fact, the trainer herself never accused Neal of any wrongdoing whatsoever. Incredibly, the university’s inquiry into the two student’s sex lives was triggered by a report to the athletic training department by “Doe’s” friend, who simply assumed she had been raped when she saw her sporting a hickey.
                Universities have LGBTQIA “Pride” days, teach classes that discuss the pleasures of oral and anal sex, are famously tolerant and inclusive of almost any behavior one can think of…and they suspend a student because of a “hickey?!?” Even though both parties to the alleged assault say it wasn’t an assault?
A hickey? Hickeys were popular signs of affection back in the straight-laced 40’s and 50’s. June Cleaver probably had a few. The alleged “raper” and the alleged “rapee” both say there was no rape. Yet, despite the testimony of the only two people actually involved in the incident/tryst, the school’s Director of Perversity and Delusion decides to suspend Neal anyway?
The lawsuit alleged that the university violated Neal’s due-process rights in following legally non-binding “guidance” concerning sexual assault investigations from the federal Office for Civil Rights. (That should’ve been a slam-dunk). Yet the university’s suspension remains in effect until “Doe” graduates, and has resulted in Neal losing both his wrestling and his football scholarships, while also limiting him from pursuing his athletic career at other universities, the lawsuit stated. This has potentially devastating effects on his future income and well-being.
In a fit of monumental hubris, CSU-Pueblo asked the court to dismiss the athlete’s suit a year ago, claiming he failed to “allege any actual nexus between his gender and his purported mistreatment.”
According to, Magistrate Judge Craig Shaffer stated this past February that the investigators’ decision to not interview witnesses favorable to Neal’s story “all suggest bias and inaccuracy in the outcome.” Shaffer then recommended that Judge Raymond Moore deny the school’s motion to dismiss, prompting the following objection from the university: “[T]he Magistrate Judge here has accepted Plaintiff’s self-serving conjecture, unsupported by a single factual allegation, that CSU-Pueblo administrators were motivated to adopt a discriminatory approach towards male students as a result of pressure from federal authorities.”
“Self-serving?” He’s the plaintiff. What the hell is he supposed to do, just accept whatever random punishment the school feels like dishing out? “Conjecture, unsupported by a single factual allegation?” That would demonstrably be what the trainer’s “friend” and the university itself engaged in.
Sadly, many modern “institutions of higher learning” aren’t interested in facts if they don’t support their own institutional biases and self-serving conjecture.

And that is a fact.

Saturday, July 22, 2017

London's Tube Says Good-Bye To "Ladies And Gentlemen"

                The famous London Underground train, or “tube,” as it’s commonly called in England, will no longer use the time-honored “(Welcome) ladies and gentlemen” greeting, Metro has reported. The iconic, subterranean rapid transit system has bowed to months of intense pressure and lobbying from LGBT activists. Transport for London employees have instead been instructed to use phrases such as “Good afternoon, everyone” as the city moves towards broad-based gender neutrality.
                Many have long called for the removal of the “offensive” phrase, saying that it is archaic and repressive. In reality, it’s simply far too accurate and civilized for the times. Other, more inclusive greeting phrases that have been given the go-ahead to replace the reactionary “(Greeting) ladies and gentlemen” include: “welcome, people,” “hey, all you theys,” (the preferred pronoun of most transgenders), and “what up, hoes and pimps?!”
                Submitted for approval, but still pending endorsement, are: “hiya,’ mass of humanity,” “hello, homo sapiens,” “greetings and salutations to you, cis-gendered, non-binary, all-gendered, non-gendered, some-gendered, partial-gendered, gender non-believing, gender-neutral, and others,” “bonjour, equally-valued, egalitarian, citizens of the world and offspring of our mother the earth,” and… “hi ya’ll.”

Friday, July 21, 2017

Pope Francis Confidant Condemns Conservative Christians

                The Reverend Antonio Spadaro, a close confidant of Pope Francis, recently wrote- in a Vatican-approved magazine- a piece condemning some American evangelicals and their Roman Catholic supporters for mixing religion and politics. Rev. Spadaro, editor of the Jesuit journal La Civilta Cattolica, said their worldview promotes division and hatred, and has inspired an “ecumenism of conflict” that demonizes opponents and encourages a ‘theocratic type of state.”
                Apparently, even the Vatican doesn’t want Christianity to spread.
                Spadaro also accused conservative religious supporters of President Donald Trump of promulgating a “xenophobic and Islamophobic vision that wants walls and purifying deportations.” Like the walls around the Vatican, perhaps, Reverend Charlatan? And aren’t “purifying deportations” on par with exorcisms? Spadaro co-wrote the article with Marcelo Figueroa, a Presbyterian pastor who is the editor of the Argentine edition of the Vatican newspaper L’Osservatore Romano, in the Pope’s native country. It would seem that higher-ups in various Christian religions are in agreement that Christianity is dangerous.
                Which is particularly bizarre and disturbing given the fact that we don’t see devout Christians rioting in the streets, looting and assaulting others. The sowing division, hatred and conflict thing belongs to the secular left- or the fundamentalist Muslims.
                The righteous Reverend was also in the news recently for averring that, unlike in mathematics, in the religious world, 2+2 can equal 5. Here is his Twitter tweet from January 5th, 2017:
                “Theology is not #Mathematics. 2+2 in #Theology can make 5. Because it has to do with #God and real #life of #people…”
                Why do the most powerful people on earth insist on making fools of themselves on Twitter?
                In point of fact, St. Thomas says, in Summa Theologica, that theology has a “greater certitude” than any other science, and that mathematics, and other similar speculative sciences, “derive their certitude from the natural light of human reason, which can err.” While theology, on the other hand, “derives its certitude from the light of divine knowledge, which cannot be misled.”
                We can believe whatever we wish, of course (as long as we don’t say it out loud where a leftist might hear it). I know I don’t have all the answers. But I do recognize that humans didn’t create themselves, their brains, or the universe. (We did create Twitter, however)!
                Therefore, we don’t even know what we don’t know. And people who don’t know that…are often arrogantly rioting in the streets, blindly sowing division and hatred.


Thursday, July 20, 2017

Phil Donahue Says This Is The Darkest Moment In American Political History

                “This is the darkest political moment in American history,” former talk-show host Phil Donahue stated recently on MSNBC, adding, “Who’s going to argue that?”
                Gee, I don’t know Phil…I guess I will.
                Let’s see, we’ve had the Aaron Burr-Alexander Hamilton duel between the sitting Vice-President of the Unites States and a former Secretary of the Treasury, in which the latter was slain. We’ve experienced several assassinations, including of Abraham Lincoln, at the very end of a war between American states. You might have heard of it. 620,000 Americans died in that “political moment.” Kind of dark, Phillip John, wouldn’t you agree?
                There was Watergate, your previous favorite scandal, P.J. Then we had to survive gas lines, stagflation, double-digit interest rates, “malaise” and the bizarre reign of an all-too-sober, pseudo-intellectual redneck who “lusted in his heart.” We would have been better off with his authentically redneck brother Billy as Commander-in-Chief.
                 “Hypocrisy is killing us,” Donahue said recently on CNN’s “Reliable Sources.” (CNN and “reliable sources” should never appear in the same paragraph together. I apologize). He was upset that, though Americans tout their patriotism, only about half of them vote. “We were apathetic and we looked up and think (sic) now, holy cow, we got a—we got—I don’t even want to say it. We got a P-U-S-S-Y grabber for president and we are appalled.”
                Donahue, who tries desperately to come off as a European-style “intellectual,” though his I.Q is more likely on par with a water buffalo’s, apparently leads an utterly unexamined life.
                It was not many years ago that President Bill Clinton was impeached for his actual, real- and eventually admitted- adulterous Oval Office affair with a young intern, one that involved creative uses of cigars, dress stains, and fellatio while El Presidenté was on the phone with world leaders…and about which he (originally) lied while under oath. This is also the same president that was accused of raping various other women prior to attaining office. Strangely, Mr. Donahue didn’t hyperventilate over those minor indiscretions.
                Donahue is himself a hypocrite of the highest and rankest order, pretending he disdains hypocrisy while taking it to a never-before-reached level.
                We are actually approaching the darkest moment in American political history, Phil. But that moment will arrive when conservatives are barred from speaking on college campuses, when Christian organizations are labeled as “hate groups,” when men can simply claim to be women and be granted rights to use their public restrooms and locker rooms, when cigarettes are banned but marijuana is legalized, and when a duly-elected president can be removed from office simply because an entitled and infantilized minority is tired of democratic republicanism.
                That moment is here, Phil. Who’s going to argue that?

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

Swedish Christian School Banned From Practicing Christianity

                A Swedish Christian preschool has banned children from saying grace at mealtime. Nor can they say “Amen.” Or talk about the Bible.
                It’s not much of a Christian school, is it?
                However, the decision to forbid children at the Christian school from engaging in Christian practices was, for all intents and purposes, forced on the school. The municipality of Umea’s education supervisors inspected the school and determined that the Christian activities violate Sweden’s national educational policies, according to a report by Swedish national broadcaster STV. The Swedish Education Act says children must be allowed to opt-out of any religious practices, even, apparently, those in a “Christian” school. The intrepid government inspectors were of the opinion that the school, managed by the Salvation Army, didn’t clearly offer kids a choice as to whether they wanted to participate in activities such as saying grace before eating a meal. (If the meals this school provides are anything like the ones I attempted to consume in my lengthy public-school career, its kids have a clear and present need to pray).
                The kindergarten’s manager, Britt Mårtensson, told STV that, “We knew we could no longer have prayer time while children are at their desks where they learn, so we thought we would add grace as a nice feature during mealtimes. We interpreted the law differently than the municipality.” She added that the Scandinavian country’s Education Act “can be interpreted in different ways” and that she didn’t believe giving thanks at mealtimes constituted “education.”
                Mårtensson said that, since the municipality’s decision, the kids now sing a rhyme giving thanks to the sun, the rain, and the food at mealtimes. Perhaps it goes a little something like this:

                Thank you sun
                Thank you rain
                For the food
                We can’t explain

                And thank you sky
                And thank you Earth
                For we can’t talk
                Of a special birth

                Everything is
                So it seems odd
                That we can’t say
                It comes from God

                Know what’s best
                Passes that test

                It’s government
                That rules the day
                That is the truth
                The light and the way

                From its teachings
                We must not stray
                Innate Christian tolerance has emboldened leftists, hyper-secularists, terrorists, and anarchists, and has, ironically,  directly led to the increased attacks on Christians and Christianity of late. It is time for Christians to push back against this Crusade of chaos, craziness, corruption and criminality. The tyranny of political correctness and “one-way multiculturalism” (credit to Mark Steyn) must be ended.
                As Thomas Jefferson said, “I have sworn on the altar of God, eternal hostility to all forms of tyranny over the minds of man.”
                “Amen” to that.

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Artist To Make Snow Globes For Planned Parenthood

                CNN recently reported that a St. Louis artist named “Bunny Burson” will be utilizing some of Hillary Clinton’s tragically unused election night confetti to make snow globes to raise funds for Planned Parenthood. Burson attended Clinton’s election eve watch party at the Javits Center in Manhattan, eagerly anticipating being caught in the blizzard of confetti that would signify the election of the nation’s first (allegedly) female president, if you don’t count Jimmy Carter.
                Given the recent history of CNN, and the artist’s first name, I felt compelled to verify the story via other sources. I have done so. It appears CNN accidentally got something correct, and that this tale is true. I’m sure someone will be sacked.
                The confetti-filled snow globes are to be sold inside Planned Parenthood clinics in St. Louis, with all proceeds benefitting the organization, and its quest to rid the world of those scary “fetuses of color.” And, I don’t know about you, but nothing makes me feel the spirit of Christmas  a winter wonderland scene more than an abortion clinic. Cue Burl Ives and Bing Crosby!
                Yet Burson apparently believes that Planned Parenthood is somehow in the vanguard of America’s women’s rights movement, now in its 169th year: “I just feel whether it’s running for office or breaking their own glass ceiling in some other way, now’s a time not to give up,” she stated.
                Hillary hawking shirts, artists donating snow globes? Who- and what’s- next in line to help fill Planned Parenthood’s coffers so they can open more shiny, new Mega-death shops? Let’s put our heads together and think outside of the womb box. Any suggestions?
                Maybe Planned Parenthood itself can sell any unused baby parts they have lying around to the DNC. The DNC could then make trinkets, gewgaws and curios out of these pieces and give them back to the organization so they could sell them for a tidy profit.
                Planned Parenthood has a number of slogans it uses in its advertising. One is: “Act. No matter what.” Another is: “Stand with PP.”
                Perhaps it would be better if couples thought before acting. No matter what.
                If they’d put their “PP’s” away, they wouldn’t have needed Planned Parenthood’s services.
                And they could “Stand with dignity.” For the rest of their lives.

Monday, July 17, 2017

Hillary Clinton Hawking "Nasty Woman" T-Shirts For Planned Parenthood

                How the mighty have fallen. Former presidential candidate Hillary Clinton is now hawking T-shirts for Planned Parenthood. She is doing so to raise money to support the nation’s largest abortion provider’s “Planned Parenthood Advocacy Project” in Los Angeles County, a political advocacy group agitating to keep abortion safe (for the mother), legal and available everywhere. And funded by taxpayers, whether they like it or not, representation be damned.
                Clinton recently tweeted a picture of herself holding up a black T-shirt with the words “Nasty Woman” written on it In white letters, further proving the accuracy of Trump’s pre-election insult. The shirts are currently being sold and promoted by the cable television network TBS, though this, of course, in no way indicates any bias whatsoever on the part of the network. Samantha Bee, host of the network’s “Full Frontal with Samantha Bee,” is spearheading the sales push.
            Bee had previously stated: “With the uncertainty of the health care bill, we may need to keep Planned Parenthood afloat one t-shirt at a time,” which is an absurdity, as the recently approved budget funds Planned Parenthood in full. The sales goal for Clinton’s shirts was one million dollars, and that goal has already been surpassed, making many wonder anew why any federal funding is needed, let alone the half a billion dollars that Planned No-Parenthood currently receives annually.
                TBS, Bee, Clinton, and their band of merry mass-murderers tout the shirt sales with this message (I took the liberty of adding the italicized words in parentheses):
                “By getting this exclusive ‘Nasty Woman’ shirt (and/or hoodie), you’re joining Samantha Bee and countless other smart, fearless women and men (there’s nothing braver than killing your own defenseless baby!) in supporting Planned Parenthood Advocacy Project Los Angeles County, standing up for women’s (aka, human) rights (except for really small ones) and helping to pave the way for a brighter future (without so many humans!). This is such an incredible time in our country’s history (I f**king hate Trump). Don’t you want to look back on it with (gay) pride (!), knowing that you helped make a difference? We do! Join us and let’s make it (innocent babies dying for the convenience of sluts) happen.”
                 (Writer’s note: I have been unable to determine- as of this writing- the veracity of the rumor that Hillary’s husband, former President Bill Clinton, has joined the sales force of the Adam & Eve Company to peddle adult sex toys).

Sunday, July 16, 2017

Veteran's Memorial Park In Minnesota To Get Satanic Monument?

                Veteran’s Memorial Park in Belle Plaine, Minnesota, may soon be home to the first Satanic monument on public property in U.S. history. Now that’s “fundamental change/transformation” you can believe in! Thanks Barack and Bill!
                The monument is being erected for The Satanic Temple, and is being built by a group of Satanists from Massachusetts. It features an upturned helmet atop a black cube.
                The city decided to allow the monument to be placed at the veteran’s park after a “religious freedom” group threatened a lawsuit over another statue, entitled “Joe,” which features a soldier kneeling and praying over a grave marked with a cross. City officials say the “memorial” is finished, but that they are “still working out a date for when it will go in,” according to According to the officials, the monument has to be put in a small area called “The Free Speech Zone,” that is specifically designated for 10 or fewer memorials, “as long as they honor veterans.”
                What could honor veterans more than a monument to Satanism?
                Belle Plaine resident Donna Karnitz, whose husband is a veteran of the Vietnam War, says she finds the idea of the new Satanic monument offensive. “It was approved a while back already, and it has not come here,” she said. “I am hoping and praying that it doesn’t come into the park here!” Others are, as well. There is a protest planned at the park on Saturday during the city’s popular BBQ Days festival.
                Small towns, Middle America, veteran’s memorials, Barbeque Days, and…Satanic monuments. They go together like mom, baseball, apple pie, Chevrolet, and…Charles Manson.
                Cary Coop, a city council member, says he voted against the designated free speech area. He stated: “I don’t think there’s too many Satanists around here, but it’s free speech.” Coop admits they anticipated other groups coming in. “We were warned against creating this free speech zone, and it will probably be just as well that we didn’t have one, that people could use private property to say whatever they want,” he said.
The entirety of the United States was designated-by the Founders- as a free speech zone. We have not the power to “create” one anywhere we want, thereby unconstitutionally constricting First Amendment rights to these limited, specific areas. Nor does this mean we are forced to accept that any and all monuments to chaos and evil must be allowed to be placed on cemetery grounds and other public spaces. Hell, we can no longer even put The Ten Commandments in these venues, and we are rapidly removing monuments to those who fought for the South in the Civil War.
Sadly, the self-proclaimed “tolerant left” has no tolerance for dissenting views. This is why conservatives are routinely threatened with violence and ultimately banned from speaking on college campuses. The supposedly intolerant, bigoted “right,” on the other hand, has such reverence for- and misunderstanding of- the First Amendment, Judeo-Christian values and the true meaning and application of tolerance that it continually allows itself to be bullied and marginalized. This is especially true of garden-variety Republicans. There is only one possible outcome of this current reality, and the left knows this, and utilizes this to its full advantage. This is why the left knows that time is on its side, and why Republicans, who hold most governor-ships, the House, the Senate, and the presidency, preposterously still can’t pass their own agenda.
Bring on the monuments to disaffection, impotence and stupidity.
The Satanic Temple says it does not promote a belief in a “personal Satan” and that “religion can, and should, be divorced from superstition.” That’s nice. Comforting, too.  In other words, don’t put your faith in religion. Put it in science…and Satanism.
(Update: As of Sunday, July 16th, it appears the town’s city council will do away with the free speech zone, preventing the Satanic monument from being placed in the park. Sadly, as a result of this same apparent decision, “Joe” has been removed from the park, likely never to return. The Belle Plaine city council is slated to decide the matter, once and for all, on Monday, July 17th).

Saturday, July 15, 2017

Journalists' Brains Exhibit Lower Than Average Levels Of Executive Functioning

                 A new study, led by neuroscientist and leadership coach Tara Swart and conducted in association with the London Press Club, found that journalists’ brains exhibit lower than average levels of executive functioning. This means they have a less than average ability to control their emotions, solve complex problems, show creative and flexible thinking, and suppress biases.
                Well, knock me over with a feather.
                The study, as reported by Business Insider, analyzed 40 journalists from newspapers, magazines, broadcast media, and online platforms over the course of seven months in an attempt to determine how they function under stress. The journalists participated in tests relating to their lifestyle, health, and behavior, with each subjected to a blood test. They also wore a heart-rate monitor for three days, kept a food and drink diary for a full week, and completed a brain profile questionnaire.
                The results showed that the journalist’s brains operated at a lower level than the average population. No surprise there. This was assumed to be, in part, because of dehydration, and their significantly greater-than-average intake of alcohol, caffeine and high-sugar foods. Less than 5% of those in the study drank the recommended daily amount of water.
                Interestingly enough, interviews showed the group as a whole thought their jobs had a great deal of meaning and purpose. No surprise there, either.
                A majority of them just don’t possess the traits necessary to do those jobs well, speaking of the obvious.
                Many “journalists” admittedly get into the business to “change the world.” And, for many, their desire to characterize events in a manner in keeping with their biases leads them to project their take on events rather than objectively describing them. This accomplished, they can then nod knowingly, smile ingratiatingly, imbue their voices with caustic sarcasm, or fairly shout in righteous anger in preening attempts to display their superior morality.
                In this way, they turn reality into mawkish theater. Thus, they create news. Thereby, by definition, fake news is born. The very fake news they claim to abhor.

                “Trump want drain swamp. Me live in swamp. Therefore, Trump bad. Kill Trump. Kill Trump!”

Friday, July 14, 2017

Nevada Suffers"Emergency" Recreational Marijuana Shortage

                 “Nevada approved an emergency regulation Thursday aimed at solving a marijuana shortage,” so trumpeted the Los Angeles Times story. There was an “emergency” marijuana shortage? The horrors! What urgent plight must the state face next, a Doritos deficit?
                The new regulation is aimed at alleviating the dope shortage “by expanding who is allowed to transport the drug from cultivation facilities to retail dispensaries,” according to The Times. The Nevada Tax Commission voted unanimously in favor of the regulation just two weeks after the state began allowing the sale of recreational marijuana. Supply problems had quickly surfaced because virtually no one had been licensed to transport it.
                The referendum Nevada voters passed last year legalizing the drug for recreational use stipulated that only liquor wholesalers would be allowed to apply to distribute marijuana for the first 18 months of sales. The proviso was a concession to the alcohol industry, which was- and is- worried about new competition from pot. However, far fewer alcohol distributors applied than was expected, and, as of a few days ago, none had been approved.
                That’s government for you: stoned immaculate. (Google it).
                So, when sales of “recreational” pot began on July 1st, retail shops- all of which were already selling marijuana for medical use- had to rely on their existing stocks, which quickly ran low.
                Jim DeVolld, the chairman of the state’s tax commission, averred that the emergency regulation was necessary, and noted that “This is such an important time in the state of Nevada’s existence." He added, “We’re trying to do the right thing.”

                The times, they are a-changin’. 

                Who could have imagined this scenario even a few short decades ago?

Leave It to Beaver Episode:
Ward: “June, do you know where I left my weed?”
June: “I think you left your Acapulco Gold in the Beaver’s room…and I’m sure I saw Wally with your sinsemilla this morning. Also, there are some hash brownies and cannabis candy bars in the jar on the kitchen counter if you’d like some, dear.”

                In light of the dramatic increase in car accidents and THC poisoning, especially among children and pets, in states such as Colorado that have recently legalized marijuana, it will be interesting to see how the tourist and gambling mecca of Las Vegas fares while subjected to “reefer madness.”
                This is especially so with the arrival of professional sports in Sin City. The Las Vegas Golden Knights of the NHL start play this coming fall, while the Las Vegas Stoners Raiders(?) of the NFL will arrive sometime in the next few years.

Arena announcer: “Welcome Golden Knights fans. Please note that everyone in section 124 will receive a free 1-year supply of cannabis if the Knights score a power play goal tonight!”

Concession stand vignette: “Dude, I’d like a tall beer, a dime’s worth of weed, and like, the biggest container of Cheetos you’ve got, my man!”
                Booze, betting and bhang. What could go wrong?

                Come mothers and fathers
                Throughout the land
                And don’t criticize
                What you can’t understand
                Your sons and your daughters
                Are beyond your command
                Your old road is rapidly agein’
                Please get outta’ the new one if you can’t lend your hand
                For the times they are a-changin’

                (© Bob Dylan Music Co.)

Thursday, July 13, 2017

The Left, Media, Totally Unhinged

                It is literally impossible to overstate the bias and hypocrisy of the mainstream media. Its insane clown posse show continues unabated. It is currently consumed with attempting to find collusion between the Trump administration and the Russian government, despite a complete lack of evidence, and even though it is now beyond doubt that some of the very people who are looking to impeach Trump have colluded with Russians in their efforts to take Trump down.
                And then there is the staggering difference in how violence and threats of violence are covered by those in the coastal mass media. Those who they reflexively tar as “Right-wing extremists,” who are, in the vast majority of cases, simply folks who believe in limited government, of, by, and for, the people, they automatically assume to be unhinged and dangerously predisposed to violence, though this is almost never the case.
                On the other hand, actual violence- and murder!- committed by those on the left is excused, papered-over, or never mentioned at all. Over 30 Republican members of Congress have been attacked or been the victim of death threats just since early May. Think you’d have heard more about this if instead 30 Democrats had been the recipients of the attacks and threats?
                On June 17th, Missouri Rep. Ann Wagner revealed that she had gotten five death threats in the weeks leading up to the Scalise shooting. Protesters vandalized her home, picketed her church, and drew chalk outlines of dead bodies on her driveway.
                On June 22nd, a man was arrested for leaving a voicemail threatening Ohio Rep. Steve Stivers and his family. The message stated, “We’re coming to get every goddamn one of you and your families. Maybe the next one taken down will be your daughter. Huh? Or your wife.”
                That same day, Utah Rep. Jason Chaffetz went on “Fox & Friends” to reveal a voicemail he received: “I suggest you prepare for the battle mother**ker, and the apocalypse, because we are going to hunt your ass down, wrap a rope around your neck, and hang you from a lamppost.” (Lynching is once again sanctioned by Democrats. This time it is a white person).
                Recently, Phil Montag, a Nebraska Democratic Party official, expounded on how glad he was that Congressman Scalise had been shot, via an audio recording posted on YouTube. “I wish he was (expletive) dead,” Montag stated in the recording.
                This came just one week after another Nebraska Democratic official viciously mocked grieving members of Congress following the attempted murder of Republican softball players in Alexandria, Virginia. Chelsey Gentry-Tipton, chairwoman of the Democratic Party’s Black Caucus, posted a Facebook thread about the shooting, in which she wrote: “Watching the congressmen crying on live tv abt the trauma they experienced. Y is this so funny tho?”
                What would have been the fate of any Republican official writing of John Kennedy’s assassination: “Y is this so funny tho?” Beyond the pale. Beyond belief. At least I wish it were. But this is, clearly, the modus operandi of the new Democratic-Socialist Party of America. And their media puppets.
                Recently, Mark Prichard was arrested at Arizona Senator Jeff Flake’s office after he told a staffer, “You know how liberals are going to solve the Republican problem?... They are going to get better aim. That last guy tried, but he needed better aim. We will get better aim.” (Referring to the Scalise shooting. Flake was also on the field that day). Say, aren’t Democrats great gun-control advocates? Where was the 24/7 mainstream media coverage of this “gun nut?” This tells anyone with a shred of independence and open-mindedness all they need to know about media bias.
                Yet another Nebraskan, an Omaha man, was recently arrested by the FBI on suspicion of making threats against Republican Senator Joni Ernst of Iowa, including that he “could kill” her.
                And now, Scott Hamann, a Maine state lawmaker, took to Facebook to call Trump a “joke,” and a “rapist,” while threatening the president’s life. “Trump is a half term president, at most, especially if I ever get within ten feet of that p*ssy.” (Funny, isn’t that a word that drove the left insane when Trump allegedly used it? Haven’t heard anything at all about this would-be assassin’s use of the term).
                And, what about all the celebrities wishing to decapitate or assassinate our duly elected leaders?
                Madonna says she “thought a lot about blowing up the White House.” Snoop Dogg “shoots” Trump in the head in a music video. (I’m guessing he would’ve been upset if a musician had “shot” Obama in the head in a music video. Call me crazy). Kathy Griffin beheaded him in a graphic photo. Robert De Niro said, “I’d like to punch him in the face.” Joss Whedon hoped that a rhino would “f**k Paul Ryan to death.” A Shakespeare in the Park play shows Trump getting stabbed to death. Rapper YG threatens Trump with a song called “F--- Donald Trump.” The notorious Marilyn Manson kills Trump in a music video. Virginia Rep. Tom Garrett and his family were also the recipients of multiple death threats, with one such message reading, “This is how we’re going to kill your wife.” Shortly after that, FBI agents arrested a Tucson Unified School District employee for making violent threats against Arizona Rep. Martha McSally. Agents said 58-year-old Steve Martan left threatening voice-mails for McSally, telling the Republican congresswoman that her days were "numbered."  Also last month, police in Tennessee charged 35-year-old Wendi Wright with felony reckless endangerment for allegedly trying to run Republican Congressman David Kustoff off the road after a town hall he held regarding the GOP health care bill. If Wright stays out of trouble and abides by the terms of her one-year restraining order, then all charges will be expunged from her record, reported Buzzfeed, which covered the story in sympathetic terms. "Wendi Wright can't have any contact with Republican Rep. David Kustoff for a year after she chased after him for his vote on Obamacare last month," read the story's sub-headline.  See the pattern here?
                Then you have Johnny Depp, star of Pirates of the Caribbean, “joking” about assassinating President Trump at this year’s Glastonbury Festival of Contemporary Performing Arts. Crowds cheered when he asked, “When was the last time an actor assassinated a president?” He then added, “…it has been a while and maybe it is time.”
                Somewhere, Abraham Lincoln is laughing, I’m sure.
                That this kind of depraved hate-speech would never have been tolerated if directed at Barack Obama or Hillary Clinton is absolutely irrefutable. That this is only okay/ignored/put up with/reveled in because trump is seen only as a rich, white, male is absolutely irrefutable.
                I would love to debate anyone on the left or in the mainstream media (redundant, I know), on any topic at any time…but they won’t debate because they know they can’t win. Logic and facts are not on their side. But they want what they want- when they want it- anyway. That is why they continually resort to throwing violent tantrums while essentially screaming, “I know you are, but what am I?”


Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Diversity Cards: Let's All Play!

                I have good news for you dear readers! I recently returned from my last diversity training class, and I can honestly say that I’ve finally seen the light! I passed!! And I am seeing things through a new set of eyes, so to speak! I now realize that Western Civilization was set up solely to benefit rich, white, men! Discrimination and bigotry are all around us! Microaggressions are everywhere! The 99% of us that aren’t rich, old, white dudes have been bullied and marginalized for centuries!
                Anyway, as soon as I got back from D.T., I went on and accessed its Culture and Diversity page like the instructor told us to do. It’s so cool! They have, like, diversity flash cards and games…even diversity bingo! They had a set of 387 diversity cards, each with a question and the correct answer to that question. Here are some of my favorites:

162.  True or False

When we show ethnocentrism, we use our own cultural standards to determine what is right or normal.  (True! “Right or normal?” Like, who are we to say. That’s crazy talk)

222.  True or False

As we develop our diversity consciousness, our thinking becomes more flexible. (True. Mine’s like really flexible now!)

241. The spread of objects and ideas from one culture to another is called? (Cultural Diffusion.  I got that one wrong. I thought it was “appropriation.” I’ll have to ask my instructor)

251. Deborah Tannen’s research focuses on the different communication styles of who? (Men and women. I got that one wrong, too. I was confused, because, as everyone knows, there are 63 different genders, and I felt this question marginalized the transgendered and non-gendered, etc.)

383.  True or False

According to the text, there is no optimal level at which we can stop developing our diversity consciousness. (True! Duh!)

386.  Gradually, the term _____ has become more inclusive and multidimensional. (Diversity. Isn’t that cool, even the term “diversity” is becoming more diverse?!)

I bet you could play some really cool card games using diversity cards! I mean, Go Fish, poker- even solitaire- could be adapted to diversity cards.  And these could be so much more inclusive and less triggering than regular playing cards. Earlier today I was thinking, in my increasingly flexible way, while looking at a standard deck of cards. I can’t believe they can still sell these things!
Just for starters, the four suits are all marginalizing- or worse. Hearts? How do they make someone who has lost a loved one feel? Diamonds? This implies ill-gotten wealth at the expense of the poor! Clubs? Do we want to glorify a weapon, a baby-seal killer? Spades? Really? Why not just bring back the “N” word? Why don’t we replace these four “suits” with doves, white poppies, rainbow flags and peace signs?
What’s more, the four “2” cards could be construed to mean that marriage between two people is somehow normative- and preferable to- being alone or being in a polyamorous relationship. What’s so bad about one, or three or four or five or…? And the Aces should be replaced by something less offensive and overtly meritocratic. “Ace,” in the dictionary, is defined as “a very skilled person; expert; adept,” and “a grade of ‘A,’ the highest grade or score.” Talk about aristocracy! How shaming is that to those who weren’t as lucky in life’s lottery!
There is also the fact that two of the three face cards are male-themed…the jack and the king. Coincidence? I think not! Moreover, jokers are almost always depicted as males, too. Don’t they think anyone else has a sense of humor, dammit? Who can fail to see the blatant misogyny in a deck of playing cards when 71.4% of the “gendered” cards are male?! And rich, old, white males at that.
Even the names of traditional card games are scary and triggering. Blackjack, Old Maid, Crazy Eights, and War? So we’re fine with mocking colored people, older women that aren’t married to a man, and the mentally challenged, all while celebrating nationalism and coordinated violence on a massive scale? Deal me out.

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Television Networks "Hiding" Shows For Better Ratings

                The estimable Wall Street Journal reported recently that television networks occasionally boost their ratings by deliberately, if selectively, misspelling the titles of their shows. This practice is usually used to hide a network show’s poor performance on any given night. For example, NBC re-titled its “NBC Nightly News” as “NBC Nitely News” for its Friday of Memorial Day weekend airing this year, when a huge number of people were away from their televisions. This “fooled Nielsen’s automated system, which listed ‘Nitely’ as a separate show,” according to the Journal. Effectively hiding the May 26th program from Nielson significantly improved the show’s average viewership that week, so, “instead of falling further behind first-place rival ‘ABC World News Tonight,’ the NBC news show actually narrowed the gap.”
                ABC complained last month, when NBC intentionally misspelled an entire week of “Nightly News” broadcasts. NBC News said that it didn’t break any rules, stating, “As is standard industry practice, our broadcast is re-titled when there are pre-emptions and inconsistencies or irregularities in the schedule, which can include holiday weekends and special sporting events.” In point of fact, ABC was also guilty of the charade, re-titling its top news show as “Wrld New Tonite” seven times during the 2016-2017 season. CBS cleverly mislabeled “The CBS Evening News” as “The CBS Evening Nws” 12 times in the same season. This is all done, of course, in the interest of higher ratings, which help networks sell commercial airtime at higher rates, increasing their profitability.
                The WSJ article quotes Billie Gold, director of programming at advertising powerhouse Dentsu, Inc., as saying: “Networks never used to do this. Now it has become the norm.” Gold and other ad executives are getting frustrated with the work now required to ascertain actual network viewer ratings. In fact, Nielson plans to hold a meeting with TV industry executives to address the issue in the next few days. And re-titling- or misspelling- isn’t the only trick networks use to artificially boost their ratings numbers. CBS claimed that its legal drama “Bull” was the most-watched new show of the recently concluded TV season. Typically, a show’s viewership is calculated using the ratings of both first-run and repeat episodes (that normally have substantially lower ratings), but CBS submitted its schedule to Nielson characterizing its reruns of “Bull” as “encores.” Consequently, the ratings service categorized it as a different show and didn’t factor the reruns into the show’s season average.
                Yet another media machination involves the calculated placement of national TV commercials. NBC’s “Saturday Night Live” typically loads all of its national commercials in the first hour of the 90-minute show. Since Nielsen counts viewers of a show only through the last network commercial break, the ratings service ignores SNL’s last half-hour, when viewers generally turn away.
Moreover, reads the article, “Sometimes networks sneak in a second airing of a show and add the additional viewers to the tally of the original telecast and hope no one notices.” To this end, NBC in 2015 persuaded almost a dozen of its local TV station affiliates to rerun “Nightly News” after 2 a.m. At the time, NBC said, it was focused “on ways to reach our audience when and how they want to be reached.” 
Now tell us the one about the three bears. Talk about fake news! And false advertising.
Through diligent research, I’ve discovered that other networks are using similar ploys to trick advertisers. For example, on more than one occasion MSNBC’s show lineup listed: “The Rachel Madcow Show,” and “Lardball with Chris Matthews.” PBS occasionally retitles one of its venerable, old offerings as “Washington Leak in Review.” (Actually quite apropos today).
And then there is CNN. Its ratings were so bad for a time that it actually retitled the networks acronym, going by DNN during particularly difficult ratings periods. It has also offered shows temporarily labeled, “The Situation Room with Wolf Blitzen,” “Anderson Pooper 360°,” “Anthony Bourdain’s Parts Are Unknown,” and “CNN FakeNewsroom.”
The mainstream media goes nuts if businesses, advertisers, or Republicans are ever anything but completely above-board, ethical and transparent in their endeavors. Yet, hiding and deliberately mislabeling their own shows is simply “standard industry practice.” Amazing.
Speaking of transparency, two of the three previous paragraphs are fake news. I made them up as parody. But, while they may not be factual, and may be biased, some will find them humorous. Just like CNN.
The difference? CNN wouldn’t admit any of that.