Chinese Crabs Infiltrating The U.S.?

 

The Oregon Department of Fish and Wildlife recently announced that a Chinese mitten crab was caught last month by a person fishing in the Lower Columbia River in the central part of the state. This species of crab was outlawed in the state more than a decade ago due to its aggressive and highly adaptive nature, which can lead to the damaging of ecosystems and the displacement of other native species.

A question: why is every invasive species-- whether plant or animal-- more aggressive, and better at adapting and procreating than any of our native U.S. ones? Why did we get the weak-tit flora and fauna? Mirroring the Chinese themselves, it is obvious that none of the legion of invasive species which hail from China is worried about ‘toxic masculinity.’ Maybe if our native species—and we ourselves—were more masculine we could better fend them off.

Does this phenomena ever go in reverse? Does North America possess a crab that could potentially go over to China and kick some commie crustacean ass? If not, why is this just a one-way street? And what can we do about it? And why do so many damaging invasive species come from China? Did any of them perhaps escape from a lab in Wuhan?

The Chinese mitten crab is reported to be highly invasive—and capable of climbing over 13-foot-high walls! What the hell? Are they also “Faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound?” Unsettling. “Look! Up on that wall! It's a bird! It's a plane! It’s…a…Chinese mitten crab!”

There goes the neighborhood.

Hope they taste good dipped in butter.