Sunday, September 20, 2020

Attacks On Trump To Increase As Election Nears

 

President Trump has been the victim of numerous unhinged and unverified attacks recently, each one more preposterous and less vetted than the one before. “Anonymous sources” say he secretly loathes the military and thinks those who serve are “pathetic” and “losers.” His deeply troubled, publicity-seeking niece claims he is “fundamentally a racist” and unfit for office. Joe Biden hilariously claimed that Trump was a danger to Israel…during the same week that the president negotiated a historic peace agreement between Israel and Bahrain and days after he negotiated a similar deal between the United Arab Emirates (U.A.E.) and Israel…for which he was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. And the mainstream media hurls smears and lies at the president like a berserk Pez dispenser.

Yet I’m here to tell you: you ain’t seen nothing yet. As we get ever nearer to Election Day, anti-Trumpers will pull out all the stops and accusations will fly with breathtaking rapidity and frequency. What follows is a short list of what you can expect in the coming weeks.

*September 21st: CNN will site anonymous sources in a report claiming Trump once ran while carrying scissors in a fifth-grade art class, needlessly and recklessly endangering lives. Eventually, the anonymous sources will admit that he wasn’t truly running, but proceeding at a slow trot, while emphasizing that his behavior was “inexcusable none-the-less.”

*September 24th: The New York Times will site anonymous sources in a front-page story alleging that Trump once looked only one way before crossing a street, not both ways, in direct contravention of his mother’s express wishes and direction. Days later, another source will surface on Fox News, noting that there was no traffic coming from the other direction because the road was closed, but the rest of the legacy media will refuse to acknowledge the new information.

*September 30th: MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow, hands trembling, breathlessly recounts a story an “anonymous insider close to the Trump family” gave her. Maddow says, “Apparently, when younger, Trump once called a drugstore and asked the clerk who answered if the store had Prince Albert in a can. The clerk said that, yes, the store did have the then popular tobacco product, to which Trump replied, ‘Well, you’d better let him out then, hadn’t you,’ and promptly hung up.

*October 5th: Salon sites highly placed, “unimpeachable” (though anonymous) sources in a story alleging that the president recently killed and ate his son Barron.

*October 13th: The Daily Beast runs a story claiming that, though Trump is a known misogynist, he has a “micro-penis,” and notes how the latter may explain (but not justify) the former.

*October 21st: The Drudge Report harbors a story purporting to show that Trump is secretly a proud, card-carrying member of the Church of Satan.

*October 26th: The Huffington Post runs a story alleging that, while in college, Trump liked to go to restaurants and loosen caps on salt shakers. He found that “funny” according to the report, obtained from anonymous sources.

*November 2nd: The Washington Post runs a front page, above-the-fold story claiming that Trump abuses animals “for kicks.” The story’s anonymous sources allege that a young Trump used to take a magnifying glass outside on hot summer days and burn up ants on the sidewalk. The same sources say he now prefers to pluck individual hairs from the hides of black labs.

*November 3rd: On the morning of election day, NBC breaks the explosive—and damaging-- news that a member of Trump’s cabinet says Trump does not particularly care for the television show “This is Us.” NBC’s president, Noah Oppenheim, says this is clear evidence of Trump’s “hatred for humanity” and his “general unfitness for office,” and notes that Joe Biden claims to be a big fan of the emotional and unifying drama.

 

Saturday, September 19, 2020

Now Elites Worried A COVID-19 Vaccine Coming Too Quickly

 

              The lockdown must remain in place until we can be sure hospitals won’t be overwhelmed, “they” told us. Then they said it must remain in place until we flatten the curve. Then they said it might need to stay in force until we can achieve herd immunity. But, of course, there is no way to achieve hard immunity when we are all locked down. So, they told us the lockdown would have to stay in place until a vaccine is found, a process that historically takes anywhere from 18 months to two plus years. And most of us continued to believe “them.”

              Well, the jig is up and the mask is off for any sentient being now. When President Trump said he believed a vaccine will be available in the near future, possibly before the November election, “they” did not jump for joy or express gratitude, amazement or elation. They claimed the announcement was just a political ploy, and that any vaccine that might become available in the near future would be untested, unsafe and ineffective. Trump recently stated that “three vaccines are already in the final stage,” and vowed that a vaccine would be distributed within 24 hours of completion of phase 3 trials and FDA approval. He vowed that all Americans would have access to the vaccine by April and noted that the vaccines “are going through the gold standard of clinical trials” and that “very heavy emphasis” is “being placed on safety.” Moreover, Dr. Scott Atlas, a member of the White House coronavirus task force, backed up the president’s timeline while noting that it will be up to each individual American to decide if they wish to be vaccinated or not, flatly stating “it’s not a forced vaccination.”

Yet, far from calming the fears of those in power such as big city mayors and state governors, news of an imminent vaccine seems to have frightened them even more. Why? Because they are afraid an effective, readily available vaccine would soon lead Americans to demand the removal of the “extra-Constitutional” (meaning unconstitutional) power they have wielded over them for the past six months. And that they are loath to do. Additionally, Democrats-- and their sycophants and co-conspirators in Big Tech, Big Media and Big Academia-- are scared excrementless that a viable vaccine prior to Election Day would pave the way for The Bad Orange Man to be reelected, thereby at least temporarily foiling their plans to turn the United States into a Marxist utopia like Venezuela, Cuba or North Korea.

Friday, September 18, 2020

The Burger King And Ronald McDonald Share A Kiss

 

              Burger King Finland has launched an ad campaign depicting the Burger King and long-time rival Ronald McDonald sharing a passionate kiss in a Pride-themed ad titled “Love Conquers All” honoring Finland’s Pride Week. The fast food giant’s Finland brand manager, Kaisa Kasila, recently told Adweek, “Burger King has always stood for equality, love, and everyone’s right to be just the way they are. The only instance where it might not seem so is when we’re bantering with our competition. We thought, what better way to convey our values than by portraying an all-encompassing kiss between Burger King and McDonald. We wanted to show that in the end, love always wins. And we know McDonald’s stands for the values we stand for, too.”

              I’m not sure how they know that, nor am I sure I want to know.

              The ad prompted Fernando Machado, global chief marketing officer for Restaurant Brands International (RBI)— Burger King’s parent/holding company—to post a now-viral tweet stating: “Proud to see Burger King Finland as the official partner of The Helsinki Pride. Even more proud of our 100% Corporate Equality Index. Congrats to Kaisa from the BK Finland team for such a beautiful execution.” Machado also told Adweek that the “Impossible Kiss” was an illustration that love does, indeed, conquer all, saying: “Our brand is always bold, edgy, and fun. So showcasing this ‘impossible kiss’ is a way to demonstrate that love conquers all. And we hope that ‘the other guys’ understand that it is actually a celebration of love rather than a competitive statement.”

              So “bold!” So “edgy!” So “fun!” So Proud! Get the reference to the “Impossible Kiss?” If a burger can be made out of vegetable matter, than surely the long-time representatives of two behemoth, if rival, fast food chains can suck face. Since we all share the same values, what could be better than an “all-encompassing kiss” between two same-sex rival mascots? I know, what if Tony the Tiger, Toucan Sam, and Count Chocula got it on in a series of sexy three-way cereal ads? How awesome and inclusive would that be?! Love is love! Or maybe Colonel Sanders and the Hamburglar could give each other “Impossible Hand-Jobs” while an appreciative and tolerant nation watched with growing Pride…and hunger!

Thursday, September 17, 2020

Speaker Pelosi Calls Middle East Peace Deals A "Distraction"

              When President Trump was elected, many “experts” claimed the Middle East would become even less stable. When he recognized Jerusalem as Israel’s capital and moved the U.S. embassy there, experts and observers warned that the region would literally blow up.

              Instead, he fostered historic peace agreements between Israel and the United Arab Emirates (U.A.E.), and, shortly thereafter, between Israel and Bahrain, and has since been twice-nominated for a Nobel peace Prize. The historically tense and violent region today stands more peaceful and stable than perhaps at any time in memory.

             And this, apparently, does not sit well with Democrats and never-Trumpers. The Atlantic’s Graeme Wood was so offended by the Nobel nomination that he called for the abolishment of the Nobel Prize. Wood said that Trump’s nomination struck him as “preposterous.” He wrote: Trolls are a Scandinavian invention, straight from the frigid sagas of Norse mythology, but Christian Tybring-Gjedde, a Norwegian parliamentarian, swears that he is not one. Observers of his antics this week could be forgiven for thinking otherwise. On Wednesday, he announced that he had nominated Donald J. Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize.”

            Snarky, childish, and idiotic.

            CNN’s Wolf Blitzer recently asked the Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, “How much credit do you give the President of the United States for these peace agreements?” She responded, “So, good for him for having a distraction on a day when the numbers of people who are affected and the numbers of people who are dying from this virus only increases.”

            “Good for him for having a distraction?!” A “distraction?!”

            No, Nancy Nonsense, a distraction is when you get caught flouting your own social distancing rules-- or when you publicly rip up a copy of the president’s State of the Union speech. Peace deals ushering in full normalization of diplomatic relations between Israel and multiple Arab nations are significant accomplishments

            But you wouldn’t know anything about that.

 

 

Wednesday, September 16, 2020

Minnesota Vikings And The NFL: Ready For Some Virtue-Signaling!


During their home opener against the Green Bay Packers Sunday, the Minnesota Vikings recognized the family of George Floyd, and strove to bring awareness to issues of social justice. Floyd’s family was inside U.S. bank Stadium during the recognition, despite the fact that no fans were allowed to attend the game. Players wore t-shirts that read "Be the Change" on the front during pregame warmups and had the names of people who have been killed by alleged acts of racism or police brutality on the back. Players’ helmets and coaches' hats sported decals and patches touting “social justice-related messages.” The stadium’s end zones trumpeted the messages "It Takes All of Us" and "End Racism." 
What a unique idea! How brave, outré, courageous! Nothing parroted, trite or stale here! Cutting edge, pushing the envelope stuff! What’s next, will they boldly attempt to condemn the Nazis? The abuse of animals? Abortion? Oops, sorry, had to put that last one in there for humor.
The same could be said for any professional sports team, and many college and amateur ones as well, but it’s football season and Minnesota is the state where I was born and grew up so I am singling the Vikings out. Moreover, Minneapolis is wildly liberal—and, not coincidentally-- where the current insanity all started. Maybe the Vikings were worried that the mostly peaceful rioters would burn down U.S. Bank Stadium like they have much of the rest of the city if they didn’t take a knee in their direction.
Ironically, the actual Vikings were fierce white Scandinavian raiders, pillagers, plunderers and marauders. The NFL team shamelessly appropriated the term 60 years ago, in a far less feckless and feminine era. I am surprised progressives haven’t demanded the team change its name to something less offensive, such as the Minnesota Moderates or the Minnesota Nice.
Skol!

Tuesday, September 15, 2020

L.A. Public Health Director Says Schools May Reopen After The Election


              Los Angeles’ KFI Radio AM 1640 has obtained an audio recording of Los Angeles County Public Health Director Dr. Barbara Ferrer repeatedly saying during a conference call that she doesn’t expect K-12 schools to reopen until “we are done with the election” in November. Think about that. She didn’t say that the schools might open around Halloween or in early November or “late this year.” She explicitly referenced the election as the marker for kids to return to school. Yes, she believes getting past the election would be the trigger for ceasing to dramatically upend people’s lives. Imagine that. What possible relevance does the presidential election have to schools’ response to the ongoing worldwide pandemic?
              Teacher’s unions, in harmony with the mainstream media, the “entertainment” industry, and Big Tech-- among other entities-- are blatantly using the school shutdowns as a cudgel to beat Trump with, as if somehow they were his fault. Should Biden win, you can be certain that the media will gleefully and endlessly run stories of students around the country heading back to school in a “glorious return to normalcy” starting the day after his victory is certified.
              Anyone who still clings to the belief that the education establishment has their—and their kids’—best interest in mind has now officially been schooled.

Monday, September 14, 2020

Joe Biden Recites Great Presidential Speeches Of The Past


Joe Biden Recites Great Presidential Speeches of The Past

              “You know, some say my cogn--, uh, cognormative, um…mental instability…is declining. Well, I’m here today to tell you all that there’s nothing wrong with my head. And to prove it, I’d like to recall some great lines from previous residential…I mean presidential…speeches. No notes, no teleproctor, er teleprompter, just from memory!

To begin with, we must always remember the words of George Jefferson’s Declaration of Interdependence: ‘We hold these truths to be elf-relevant, that all folks are cremated equal, and are endowed by their…you know, the thing… with certain unsustainable rights,  among these are, uh… life, liberty mutual, and the pursuit of, ummm, you know…c’mon man! Uh, ecstasy.’

As George Washington said to his troops in 1873, ‘Gentlemen, you will permit me to don my testicles, since I have grown not only gay, but nearly blind in the service of my, uh, you know, nation.’

Abe Lincoln famously said, on the playing field at Pittsburgh, ‘Four more than seven beers ago our, uh,  parents brought north on this land a new station, deceived and jittery, and medicated to the preposition that all folks are related equally.’

You know it was LBJ who told us, ‘The only thing we have to fear is…the rear itself… and our biggest task is to make people look for work.’

He also said, in dire times just like these, ‘Yesterday, December 11th, 1941—a date which will live on in the infirmary—the United States was rudely and considerably gob-smacked by naval and air forces of the Empire of…uhh, the Empire Strikes Back…no, the Empire State Building…anyway, you know who. C’mon, man!’

Then, old John Kennedy remarked, Ask not what your…ummm…monkey can do for you - ask what you can do for your monkey. Or maybe it was The Beatles. Same thing.’

Of course, he also inspired us when she said: ‘Let every nation know, whether it has wishing wells or rice, that we will burden any bears, meet any battleship, support any fiend, and oppose any toe in defense of fiefdom.’

What’s more, he challenged us in space, saying: ‘We choose to go to Venus in this decade and do, you know, the other things, not because they are easy-peasy, but because they are damned hard…those who came before us made certain that this, uh, country, strode the first waves of the, uh, French Revolution, the first waves of modern intentions and the first wave of nuclear flowers. And this new generation does not intend to flounder in the backwash of the…Age of Aquarius…they mean to beat it and uh…whatever.’

And I’d like to close by recounting a couple of President Donald Reagan’s speeches. You know, when the space shuttle blew up, he honored it by stating: ‘We will never forget the last time we saw ‘em, as they prepared to launch and waved bye-bye and got past the burly bonds of earth to touch the face of, uh…ummm…you know, the thing.

And who can forget when he stood by the English Channel on VD-Day…looking at the former soldiers…and said, ‘These are the joys of pointless shlock…’”

                                                 [fade]



Sunday, September 13, 2020

School District Suspends Student For Attempting To Come To School

 

Officials at William Floyd High School in New York recently hit Maverick Stow, a 17-year-old student, with a five-day suspension for coming to school on a Tuesday in early September, a “designated remote learning day” for Stow. The school district said that Stow believed he should attend school in-person five days a week, not four. That’s right, Stow was suspended for not skipping school.

To make matters worse, the student-criminal returned to school on the Wednesday and Thursday following his suspension and was promptly arrested by the Suffolk County Police Department for unlawfully entering school grounds. Though the district said it agrees with Stow’s view that in-person instruction should take place five days a week, it also said it was required to follow state social distancing regulations and labeled his actions as “irresponsible and selfish behavior.” And a “publicity stunt.” Huh? State social distancing regulations allow students to attend school “in-person” four days a week but not five? Do the powers that be think trimming the number of students allowed on campus by 20% makes all the difference?  

Apparently. The district noted, "We are still in the midst of a pandemic and will abide by the regulations set in place by our government and health officials designed to keep our students and staff safe. As we have said, Mr. Stow's rights as a student do not surpass the rights of any of our other 8,799 students; they should not have to come to school to witness this circus atmosphere each day." Circus atmosphere? The students that have come to school should not have to witness the “circus atmosphere” created by…a student attempting to come to school?

The school district issued a statement reading: "If Mr. Stow continues to try to access school grounds each day that we are open, we will close the high school - and its approximately 3,000 students - to all in-person learning and it will be all virtual for the foreseeable future. We will not condone or allow students to flagrantly break the law in our schools.” By attending them each day. Alrighty then. Students used to be punished for not coming to school. In days of yore that was called truancy. Now everything is bass-ackward, and truth is punished more often than truancy. District officials threaten to close the school and sentence all 3,000 of its students to virtual home detention because one student wishes to attend it five days a week? That just proves they have no class. Virtual or otherwise.

Maybe the aptly named “Maverick” should have simply claimed he was “protesting”…which in a sense he was. After all, officials don’t label rioters’ actions as “irresponsible and selfish behavior,” or as “publicity stunts.” Nor do they claim protesters create a “circus atmosphere.” And they typically don’t arrest them, either.

 

 

Saturday, September 12, 2020

Trump Vs. Biden Press Conferences

 

President Trump Press Conference Questions

September, 2020

 

CNN correspondent: “Mr. President, multiple anonymous sources have reported that you killed and ate your son Barrow. How long had you been planning to do this? Was Melania complicit in this despicable crime? And will this force you to do the right thing for once and resign your presidency and drop out of the 2020 race?”

MSNBC reporter: “Mr. President, in light of the fact that you think anyone who serves in America’s military is a “sucker” and a “loser,” how can you claim to hold police officers in high regard? What is the difference in your twisted mind between those who serve primarily abroad and those who do so at home? And, a follow-up question if I may, will this force you to resign your presidency and drop out of the 2020 race?”

CBS reporter: “Mr. President, your hatred for peoples of color has been widely and irrefutably reported, by unbiased and unimpeachable sources. So let me ask you this: as a white supremacist, do you believe all black people like fried chicken and watermelon?”

NBC reporter: “Mr. President, since you destroyed the American economy and fomented riots in the streets of her cities, all while blaming China, BLM and Antifa for what is clearly your responsibility-- and yours alone—I just wonder, how do you sleep at night, sir?”

New York Times columnist: “Sir, and I use that term loosely, no credible person doubts the existence of man-caused global warming. Everyone from Greta Thunberg to Brad Pitt to Michael Moore to Taylor Swift knows that we are about to cause the Earth to spontaneously combust. Of course, you disagree. Can you tell us if your disdain for our planet is really a reflection of your secret disgust with yourself?”

                                                    **********************

 

Joe Biden Press Conference Questions

September, 2020

 

CNN Correspondent: “Mr. Biden, are you willing to promise the American people that, should you become president, you won’t kill and eat your son Hunter?”

MSNBC reporter: “Mr. Biden, you have spoken—and ever so eloquently I might add-- in the past about your genuine, deep and abiding love for America’s troops. Would you please share with us now what you think of President Trump’s callous and unconscionable remarks? I thank you in advance for sharing your innermost thoughts with us.”

CBS reporter: “Mr. Biden, you worked closely with an African-American president. In light of that, how offended and repulsed are you by President Trump’s overt racism?”

NBC reporter: “Mr. Biden, I want to publicly commend you for always taking the high road. However, and I don’t mean to ask a harsh question, but how are you able to keep from appearing violently angry over the numerous idiotic and hateful things the president says on a daily basis?”

New York Times columnist: “Mr. Biden, as you well know, all of us in the mainstream media work selflessly, tirelessly and around the clock to provide the citizens of the United States with absolutely unbiased and factual information for their own benefit and edification. Does it not piss you off big time when Trump labels us ‘fake news?’”

 

                                                             [Fade]

 

 

Friday, September 11, 2020

CNN Remembers: 9/11


CNN Remembers: 9/11 20 Years After, A Special Report

By Chester E. Jakoff and Carla Marx, CNN

Clock Updated 11:11 AM ET, Saturday September 11, 2021

(CNN)- Who among us doesn’t recall the mostly peaceful events of that beautiful Tuesday morning 20 years ago when some people, labeled “insurgents” by those on the far right, did some things? Nineteen Middle Easterners from mostly upstanding and respected families, some including austere religious leaders, became so frustrated at the blatant and continual xenophobic, transphobic, Islamophobic, and homophobic behavior of the United States that they finally lashed out a bit, and inappropriately at that. Thankfully, the irritated “insurgents” were only successful in hijacking and directing three out of four airliners or the resulting damage could have been worse. Sadly, the Suburban Cowboy, then President George W. Bush, overreacted to the mayhem and put the U.S. on an ugly and vicious path of retribution and revenge, one which lasted until President Barack Obama (praise and peace be forever upon him) wisely steered the nation toward a path of peace and harmony with all. Unfortunately, the progress made by the Obama administration has been all but obliterated by President Trump and Vice-President Pence, who have courted and fomented violence at home and abroad, and the nation tragically finds itself more divided than ever. Let us all hope that the nascent Biden administration can now bring us all together, heal our wounds, and save the union.


Thursday, September 10, 2020

 

                                                          “Unmasking Masks”

 

Mask: noun: a covering for all or part of the face, worn as a disguise, or to amuse or terrify other people.

Verb: conceal (something) from view.

 

            Here are some synonyms for mask: camouflage, cloak, veil, affectation, air, blind, concealment, cover-up, disguise, fa├žade, front, guise, hood, masquerade, pose, posture, pretense, pretext, put-on, fig leaf.

            Virtually all of these terms have negative connotations. They all describe an attempt to hide, confuse, obfuscate, confuse and bewilder. To deny reality and truth. We may put on a mask to pretend or frighten. To do bad things anonymously. Masks are incompatible with human dignity and an open society.

            It is no coincidence that the riots, lawlessness, destruction and sheer depravity that has broken out around the country in recent days came hard on the heels of the COVID-19 pandemic and governments’ mandate that most of us give up our jobs-- and don face masks if and when we are allowed to step outside. Idleness, lack of money, loneliness, substance abuse, and resentment welled up, just waiting for a trigger to burst forth. The Minneapolis policemen who extinguished George Floyd conveniently provided that spark. The masks just made it all seem so much easier. A perfect storm. And masks aren’t just for Antifa anymore. Now they are a totem of the left, of the “resistance.” Antifa masks were illegal in some localities prior to the coronavirus crisis. Now masks are legally required in many of the same areas and de rigueur in most others.

            Masks may make rioters bolder, but they don’t make them braver. They more often are an attempt to hide the smallness, cravenness and lack of self-respect of those who wear them.

            “Experts” say masks may or may not help prevent us from getting sick. They are most certainly not amusing. Nor do they really conceal anything, other than the truth. Ironically, they reveal the sickness and cravenness that has penetrated our souls, masks or no masks.

                                                                              
        
                       


                                             

                                                                  





Wednesday, September 9, 2020

Joe Biden Says A Black Man Invented The Telephone

 

            Joe Biden wants to fact-check Donald Trump in real time during the upcoming presidential debates. This is endlessly amusing in that Sleepy Joe hasn’t uttered a truthful sentence recently with any greater frequency than he has a coherent one. Perhaps both candidates should be fact-checked equally. When Biden was in Kenosha, Wisconsin, recently to laud an “alleged” perpetrator of sexual assault—and other crimes-- who had scuffled with police, he took time out to talk history. He said, “Why in God’s name don’t we teach history in history classes?” Well, Joe, that’s because we are too busy revising history and promoting endless social justice wars.

He added, “A black man invented the light bulb, not a white guy named Edison.” Um, no. Thomas Edison invented the light bulb. That’s an incontrovertible fact. Lewis Latimer, a black man and researcher under Edison, discovered a better way to manufacture carbon filaments for Edison’s bulbs several years later.

You just know, the way things are going, Biden will pull out all the stops in an attempt to shore up the black vote…despite the fact he recently said, “If you’ve got a problem figuring out whether to vote for me or Trump, then you ain’t black.” He’s almost certain to say something like, “It’s time we recognize that black people invented pants. And the ‘boom box.’ Moreover, black folk also invented ketchup, water polo, tennis, lattes, celery…and ice hockey.”

A Biden-Trump debate would be a fact-checkers dream…or nightmare. Hyperbole is Trump’s forte, flat-out lying is Biden’s. Although, in Sleepy Joe’s defense, he may no longer be aware that he is prevaricating. Or of where he is. Thank goodness for teleprompters.

Biden might credit black people for inventing them, too.

 

Tuesday, September 8, 2020

The Lady And The Tiger


                Disturbingly, pictures of a woman fondling a tiger’s testicles at a zoo in Chiang Mai, Thailand surfaced recently.  Yes, you read that correctly. VICE News, the outlet that posted images of the incident, chose not to name the Thai tourist, who was promptly criticized on social media. Locals accused the wacky woman of “humiliating” the tiger, and the zoo of allowing the abuse of animals. Two Tiger Kingdom staff members were allegedly disciplined over the incident, though they claimed they told the woman of the rules and risks before letting her into the tiger cage. Call me a skeptic, but that doesn’t seem like a sound defense. Especially since they let her into the tiger cage.

                Who should be the most humiliated, the lady or the tiger? I’ve often heard the expression “having a tiger by the tail,” but confess I can’t say the same for “having a tiger by the testes.” In truth, the big cat appeared utterly unfazed by the wanton woman’s hold on his balls, but this may well have been due to him being under the influence of sedatives. Apparently, Asian zoos frequently drug big cats to keep them from exhibiting unruly behavior.

                Tiger Kingdom’s head zookeeper stated: “We do not allow tourists to grab the tigers' testicles, but they are allowed to touch any part of the animal's body as long as our specialists are present. From now on, we will make sure that no visitor will ever be able to touch this part of a tiger's body again.” Well, they did, in fact, allow the woman to grab a tiger by the testes. And he said tourists “are allowed to touch any part of the animal’s body as long as our specialists are present.” In any case, he has now promised that his zoo would no longer tolerate such untoward behavior in the future, which is nice.

                My question is: Has everyone just gone crazy? Did either the woman or the zoo staffers do a simple cost-benefit analysis before making their decisions? The woman would naturally think: “I could cup the tiger’s balls and possibly be okay…or I could get mauled or killed. Alright, I’m gonna do it!” Similarly, the zoo staffers would say to themselves: “Hmm, we could let a woman grab the tiger’s sack, and maybe nothing heinous would happen, or she could get mauled and we could get sued. And/or it could go viral and we could be made to look as if we don’t care about our visitors or our animals. Okay, let’s let her in!” 

                How could anyone possibly reach those decisions? What possible good could come from them?

                I’ve been asking myself those very same questions far too frequently in 2020.



                         

Monday, September 7, 2020

Protesters Sue City Of Seattle


             They used to say that “crime doesn’t pay.” But, like so many other once obvious observations and helpful pieces of advice, that may no longer be the case.
              KIRO-TV recently reported that a group of “protesters” (i.e. rioters) has filed a lawsuit against the city of Seattle, claiming that the police department’s anti-riot policies have unfairly forced demonstrators (i.e. rioters) to buy prohibitively expensive protective gear in order to continue to exercise their First Amendment rights. Apparently, they mean their “right” to burn down federal buildings, loot stores and assault officers of the law.
              The suit seeks to obtain an order from a judge preventing the city from using blast balls and pepper spray on the (mostly peaceful!) rioters. It states in part: “Each of the Plaintiffs was unable to protest for a period of time for want of additional gear necessitated by SPD’s unmitigated and indiscriminate tactics utilized without restraint.” It also labels city streets “a public forum and site of protest,” and says the policemen’s actions resulted in “a pay-to-protest racket where only a privileged few who are wealthy enough or popular enough to crowdsource funds to purchase gear akin to that used by the police department they fund can truly be in the streets.”
              A few notes about that statement. Call me a skeptic, but I’m not sure the Framers intended the public streets-- and the public and private buildings surrounding them-- to be entirely covered in vile BLM and Antifa graffiti…and “F-bombs.” Also, if only “wealthy” people can afford to “be in the streets” protesting, which I doubt, the Plaintiffs could consider getting jobs. Okay, stop it, I was just kidding!
              Th Plaintiffs noted the Seattle City Council’s proposal to dramatically reduce funding for the police, stating: “It is chilling to the bone that this quelling is occurring at the hands of SPD—the agency whose very existence is being challenged, its funding debated this week.” Chilling to the bone? They are the ones challenging the SPD’s existence!
              Fox News reported that “helmets and gas masks” were among items listed as necessary protest gear by the rioters. No word if grenade launchers and sidewinder missiles also made the list. Hey, it’s dangerous out there when you’re burning, looting, defacing and pillaging! You’ve gotta protect yourself, right?
              The protesting Plaintiffs even had the chutzpah to ask the city to pay for the costs they incurred in filing the suit. Incredibly, the Seattle City Attorney’s Office issued a statement saying that it would look into the claims. Maybe they’ll offer the “protesters” reparations.
              The KKK, Al Capone, the Unabomber and Al-Qaeda all missed the boat. Had they committed their crimes and terroristic acts today, they would undoubtedly blame their actions on “American society” and successfully sue Uncle Sam.


Sunday, September 6, 2020

Associated Press To Capitalize "Black" Not "White"


              Protests and rioting following the death of George Floyd have prompted many news organizations to examine their own staffing and practices. The Associated Press, for example, recently announced that it has changed its language usage rules and will now capitalize the word “Black” whenever it is used in the context of race and culture. The AP, whose stylebook is particularly influential in the news industry, has since announced that it will not do the same for “white.” As such, the Columbia Journalism Review, Wall Street Journal, New York Times, USA Today, Los Angeles Times, Chicago Tribune and NBC News are among the news organizations that have lately pledged to capitalize “Black” in these instances but have not yet done so for “white.” And probably will not.
              John Daniszewski, the AP’s vice president for standards, recently issued a memo to staff stating: “We agree that white people’s skin color plays into systemic inequalities and injustices, and we want our journalism to robustly explore these problems. But capitalizing the term white, as is done by white supremacists, risks subtly conveying legitimacy to such beliefs.” (I’m going to have to call “bullshit” on that explanation.) The AP also claims that, in general, white people have much less shared history and culture, and lack the experience of being discriminated against because of their skin color. That’s funny, I’m pretty sure white people have been around for many thousands of years. Was Socrates not white? And, I seem to recall that white Christians were thrown to the lions in ancient Rome. A practice that, if our own culture continues down the path it’s currently traveling, may be revived soon.
              The New York Times explained its decision on July 5th, also averring “White doesn’t represent a shared culture and history in the way Black does.” Ironically, and to its credit, the National Association of Black Journalists says “white” should be capitalized, too. Several Black scholars have joined them in that assessment.
 In openly discriminating against white people in this way, these news organizations have proven themselves wrong. Reverse discrimination is discrimination, too. And discrimination solely on the basis of skin color is always wrong.
If progressive news—and social media-- outlets really want to redress grievances and right wrongs, if they want to give succor to the marginalized, shunned and abused, they could start capitalizing “Conservative.”



Saturday, September 5, 2020

Looting A "Powerful Tool" To Bring About Lasting Change, California D.A. Says


“This is the end” spoke The Doors. And we may now have come to that moment as a nation.
New guidance from Diana Becton, first-term Costa County (California) District Attorney, states that law-enforcement officers must consider if looters “needed” the merchandise they stole before charging them. California law, under Penal Code 463, defines “looting” as taking advantage of a state of emergency to commit burglary, grand theft or petty theft, and those engaged in the act can be charged with a felony and serve up to three years in jail. But Becton, who is one of many radical district attorneys financially supported by George Soros, is attempting to circumvent the law by proposing preposterous charging guidelines for the crime. Becton says that when considering charging looters, law enforcement types should ask, “Was the theft committed for financial gain or personal need.” (Emphasis mine.)
“Pardon me, did you need the big screen television, those Louis Vuitton handbags and those bottles of Wild Turkey?”
Becton believes stealing is perfectly acceptable if one needs what one takes from someone else. Yet, when a couple painted over a “Black Lives Matter” message on a local street, her office charged them with a “hate crime.”
A government’s primary responsibility, be it local or federal, is to protect its citizens and their private property. Absent property rights and the rule of law, chaos, anarchy, and unfettered violence will reign interminably. The United States, uniquely founded on these principles enshrined in the Bill of Rights, would simply cease to exist without them.
And Becton isn’t the only person desperately seeking to justify looting. National Public Radio published a lengthy interview with Vicky Osterweil, author of In Defense of Looting, a book in which she argues that “looting is a powerful tool to bring about real, lasting change in society.” Yes, and so are murder, abortion and a nuclear holocaust. Osterweil defends looting and says that “white supremacy” is behind the idea of property. She claims the rioters-cum-looters who break windows and steal things from stores are merely “engaging in a powerful tactic that questions the justice of ‘law and order,’ and the distribution of property and wealth in an unequal society.” She avers that looting “attacks the very way in which food and things are distributed,” and the idea of property itself, which she believes is unjust because it means that “in order for someone to have a roof over their head or have a meal ticket, they have to work for a boss, in order to buy things that people just like them somewhere else in the world had to make under the same conditions.”  Yes, it’s called trade… and commerce. Osterweil needs to read Adam Smith’s The Wealth of nations.
Osterweil says that looting doesn’t really harm anyone. (Like CNN, she thinks it’s “mostly peaceful.”) Tell that to the countless small business owners who have seen their stores, dreams and lives destroyed. But she doesn’t worry about that, because she claims that the supposed value of small businesses is a “right-wing myth.” She further argues that the world is organized “for the profit of the people who own the stores and the factories,” and that looting allows rioters to “demonstrate that without police and without state oppression, we can have things for free.” Ah, there it is. Screw work, screw the rule of law, just give us free stuff! But wait, I thought property was bad. Why, then, do you want it so badly, free or not?
There are only two ways to get “free stuff.” One is to steal it. The other is through the forcible taking and redistributing of others’ property via state oppression. There may be a difference without a distinction here. Or vice-versa.
If the “It’s not a crime to take whatever you need” school of thought permeates the country’s institutions, no one’s property will be safe, including their own lives. No one will be secure in his or her person. An obvious rape defense would be, “he needed her, needed a release. He has never had a really attractive girl before, obviously due to systemic racism/ableism/ageism/body shaming/fill-in-the-blank.”
So everyone will be free to take what they want need from whomever, wherever…be it a business, neighbor, school or church.
It will be history’s most tragic irony if the American Revolution ends up being “cancelled” by modern-day Jacobins, leftist spawn of the disastrous French Revolution.  

Friday, September 4, 2020

Students Say Free Speech "Unacceptable"


The administration of Princeton University recently published a “Statement on Principles of Inclusivity and Free Speech.” The Statement affirmed that the school “cherishes both inclusivity and free speech, which can be protected even when the speech in question is ‘unwelcome, disagreeable, or even deeply offensive.’” It also noted that Princeton President Christopher Eisgruber is on record as saying the free expression policy “rests upon the idea that the pursuit of understanding, discovery, and truth benefits from the open and vigorous contestation of ideas.” That belief was the very foundation of colleges and universities for well over two centuries. Eisgruber correctly added, “We are in an era when many people mistakenly treat free speech and inclusivity as competing values. We need the benefit of multiple voices and perspectives, and we need real engagement among them.”
Not any longer. The president and two vice-presidents of the Princeton Graduate Student Government replied to their school’s shocking affirmation of free speech and the First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America, calling it “tone-deaf” and “unacceptable.” In a letter written in response to Eisgruber and the administration, the three opined that the free speech policy protects “hate” at the university. They stated, “We as a student body are not looking for ‘dialogue’ on how to cope with institutional racism,” and averred that an emphasis on the importance of free expression “reads as a typical dog-whistle often used to excuse racist speech and hateful actions.”
Their admission that they are not looking for “dialogue” is a refreshing bit of candor, as leftists/progressives never seek dialogue, only victory and submission. Especially submission.
The First Amendment was/is designed specifically to protect speech that some might find problematic or even “hateful.” There would be no reason to have an amendment to protect speech that was universally agreed upon or beloved. Who gets to decide what is “hate speech?” Nazis? Kim Jong un? Progressives? The NAACP? The John Birch Society? Mike Pence? Nancy Pelosi? Taylor Swift?
Maybe I should decide. Maybe I would have prohibited the heads of the Princeton graduate Student Government from saying what they did. After all, I found it “tone-deaf” and “unacceptable.” Hate speech, really.
Free speech is a dog-whistle used to excuse racism and hateful actions? (And civility and decorum are dog-whistles for white supremacy?) If so, then “tolerance” is just a dog-whistle for perversion, death and anarchy.
Little kids used to frequently say, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” It would be nice if today’s progressives were as mature and resilient.


Thursday, September 3, 2020

De Blasio Says BLM Issue "Transcends All Normal Realities"


              New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio unilaterally decided to paint his city’s streets with huge yellow letters spelling out “Black Lives Matter.” This unprecedented move prompted a reporter at a recent press briefing to ask the mayor the following questions: “I’d like to know whether you submitted a Department of Transportation application before you painted your ‘Black Lives Matter’ street murals across the city? What’s your plan for other groups that now want to see their own messages on city streets?” These are obvious and particularly valid questions, but ones which de Blasio wasn’t keen to field. He replied: “The fact is that what I decided to do with the Black lives Matter murals…it’s an important thing for this city to declare officially. That is something that transcends all normal realities because we are in a moment of history where this had to be said and done.”
              In other words, “How dare you question me! I am afraid of them!”
              “We are in a moment of history where this had to be said and done?” Really? Now? When black employment had been at its highest levels in history? After a two-term black president had just left office?
              BLM’s leaders have publicly stated they want to abolish the nuclear family and replace capitalism with Marxism-Socialism. They sure as hell don’t speak for all black people, no matter what Joe Biden might think. Why is this group’s cause being elevated over everyone else’s? Perhaps because of the threat of violence and the fact that it is essentially holding America’s big cities hostage?
              Here are some messages I’d like to see painted onto our cities’ highways and byways: “Abortion Is Murder.” “Reverse Racism Is Still Racism.” “Men And Women Are Different…Hence The Different Terminology.” “The Climate Has Always Been Changing.” “Socialism Sucks.” “’The Squad’ Should Be Fired.” And, “Make Orwell Fiction Again,” among others.

              One thing is clear: in 2020, all normal realities have been “transcended.”