Saturday, October 31, 2015

Halloween Etiquette, 2015

                 Is your “teal” pumpkin on display? F.A.R.E. (Food Allergy Research and Education) wants you to join the over 100,000 houses pledging to color their pumpkin(s) teal and hand out only “non-food treats.” The reason? In order to promote a “welcoming and inclusive atmosphere” for all, of course!
                Can you imagine how “invalidated” all the little devils and witches have felt over the years, knowing it’s possible they could go to other people’s houses, knock on their doors and demand free candy, and be a victim of someone handing them  goodies that might contain an ingredient to which they are allergic?
                That is real horror. The new Nightmare on Elm Street? The Johnson’s are handing out jars of Wheat Germ™ again!
                Those abodes sporting teal colored pumpkins are to be considered “safe houses,” necessary lest the kiddies come under sneak- attack by gluten-laden confections.
                In keeping with the new, fundamentally-changed American culture, here are several other tips for experiencing a progressive, safe, non-judgmental and inclusive Halloween:
1)      When a young person appears on your doorstep wearing a Caitlyn Jenner costume, it can be confusing to know what pronoun would be least offensive to use in addressing that person. Do not risk using either a masculine or feminine pronoun! Also, most “non-binary” gender individuals prefer to be called “they,” and those that aren’t/don’t are likely to be impressed with your knowledge and effort at inclusiveness. So, after dropping a coupon to Whole Foods Markets and a button proclaiming “Bernie or Bust 2016” into the mysteriously-gendered little person’s (hopefully all-natural, made-from-hemp) bag, do not say “there you are!” Instead, say “There they are” and sleep the sleep of the anointed.
2)      Any little treasures and trinkets you hand out must be gender-neutral of course, but, also, do not refer to any adults that may be chaperoning the kids as mom or dad, or infer any traditional relationship or gender whatsoever in potential conversations with them. Moreover, don’t even use the term “kid(s),” as it is possible it could be a vertically-challenged adult you’re addressing. Much better to say, “isn’t your valued smaller person so adorable!” This is much more affirming and inclusive.
3)      Please do not weep or vow to hang all white Minnesota dentists when a mysteriously-gendered, valued, smaller person shows up in a Cecil the Lion costume! This can be traumatic for the mysteriously-gendered, valued, smaller person and their entourage, such as it may be!

4)      Please do not break into sustained applause or scream, “hell yeah, baby!” if a “trick-or-treater” appears on your doorstep wearing the outfit of a Planned Parenthood physician. This may cause certain close-minded women’s health care Deniers within earshot to bloviate on the Fox News Channel. It is acceptable, however, to leave a large financial donation to the organization in the mysteriously-gendered, valued, smaller person’s biodegradable goodie bag.

U.S. Domestic Terror On The Rise

                 Just in time for Halloween, the U.S. House Homeland Security Committee has issued a report stating that 2015 has been the worst year for terrorism in the United States homeland since 9/11. The report avers that the U.S. security picture “is getting steadily worse.” There have already been some 30 cases of domestic jihad this year so far. “In July alone,” the report continued, “a terrorist murdered U.S. service members in Chattanooga, Tennessee, and authorities arrested extremists seeking to live-stream a terrorist attack on a college campus and planning to kill U.S. vacationers on the beaches of Florida.”
                The number of terror incidents involving “homegrown violent jihadists” has tripled since 2010, the report added. Moreover, authorities have arrested or charged at least 48 individuals in the United States this year and 63 since 2014, in ISIS-related cases. The study concluded, “There have been nearly twice as many ISIS-linked plots against Western targets in the first seven months of this year than in all of 2014.” Yet the Obama administration continues to treat domestic terror attacks as a local law-enforcement matter. Actually, let me be more precise. The Obama administration continues to treat domestic jihadist terror attacks as a local law-enforcement matter. The few attacks not tied to Islamist extremism are considered to be: 1) doubly bad and directly caused by- and indicative of- the racist, bigoted nature of the rural American populace, 2) an a-priori beckoning for the repeal of the Second Amendment, and 3) an excellent opportunity for the president to attempt to embarrass America in front of the world.
                Oddly enough, the American people don’t seem particularly upset by these jihadist attacks, attempted or successful, though they can be immediately whipped into a frenzy by the death of Cecil the Lion, or by a fantasy football site scandal. The proof, as they say, is in the pudding. No matter how many attacks nor how many Americans of all races die as a result of these satanic assaults by Islamic radicals, no “American Lives Matter” movement or group materializes.


Friday, October 30, 2015

Of Robots And Men: In The Future Who Will Know The Difference?

                The head of the U.S. National Institute of Mental Health, Dr. Tom Insel, is leaving that post to go to work for Google’s Life Sciences division. He will be tasked with investigating how technology can help diagnose and treat mental health conditions.
                That doesn’t sound like a bad thing, does it? It would seem a rather noble and needed pursuit, correct?
                Google proposes to accomplish this feat with ‘wearable’ technologies. This may involve sensors, bio-metrics, and constant monitoring of everything one does. One’s recent shopping and web browsing history will likely be used to help identify the first signs of mental illness. Advanced mobile phones probably will be ‘observing’ our mental health, essentially reading our minds, and then ‘fixing’ them as ‘necessary.’
                 No subjectivity here! Who provides the input, markers and parameters that tell the ‘technology’ what behaviors constitute ‘mental illness?’ Will your wearable technology essentially say to itself, “He’s accessing the ‘Drudge Report,’ I better turn him in!?” Or perhaps, “ Holy crap, now he’s ordering a Barbara Streisand c.d.!  Preparing for the wireless lobotomy!”
                We may become fully ‘robotized’ before robots do. That is scary.

                ‘Robotomy,’ anyone?

Thursday, October 29, 2015

CNBC's Republican Debate: Immoderate Moderators

8 PM, Wednesday, October 28

                “Good evening, and welcome to the third Republican Presidential Debate for the 2016 election, exclusively here on CNBC. I’m John Harwood and I’m joined by my co-moderators tonight, the esteemed Carl Quintanilla and Becky Quick. Let’s get started, shall we?!

JH: Mr. Trump, are you a comic book version of a president?
Mr. Trump: John, that’s a nasty question and you’re doing your audience, the American voters, a disservice by-
JH: Now to candidate Christie…Mr. Christie, you look like you like candy, will you be trick-or-treating this Halloween? And, if so, would you wear a Trump mask? Ooooh, scary!
Mr. Christie: For God’s sake, what kind of a question is that? I-
JH: Over to you, Carl.
CQ: Thanks, John…tough to top those questions. Mr. Bush, do you think the government needs to regulate these daily fantasy football sites that are teasing people with the allure of winning huge amounts of money?
Mr. Bush: Well, I do think the government ought to-
Mr. Christie: Enough on ‘fantasy football’ already! Let people play! Who cares? Why would the government, with all of its problems, bother with something like this? I mean we’re 19 trillion dollars in debt, we have people out of work, we’re being attacked by ISIS and Al Quada and-
JH: Shut up, Fat Boy! Becky?
BQ: I’d like to go back to talking about comic books…
CQ: Mr. Huckabee, does Trump have the moral authority to be president?
Crowd: Boooo!
MH: You mean like the Clintons? The last thing I need is to give him some more time, but I love Trump. He’s a good man. I’m wearing a Trump tie. Let the media get over that one!
Mr. Trump: Such a nasty question, but thank you governor.
JH: Mr. Christie, you’ve broken with others in your party in your statements that you believe man-caused global warming is real. If you were president, what would you do about it?
Mr. Christie: First off, what you don’t do is raise taxes and send the money off to Washington. They haven’t proven they can fix anything and-
JH: But, what would you do?
Mr. Christie: I’d invest in all types of energy sources and-
JH: But what specifically?!
Mr. Christie: Are you going to answer the question or am I? How are we going to do this? I’ve gotta tell you, even in New Jersey what you’re doing is called rude!
JH: Ha, Ha, Carl?
BQ: I thought we were going to ask more comic book questions…
CQ: Carly Fiorina, if you’re elected (giggle) how do you plan to conduct the Republican’s war on women? Any change in tactics? I mean, you’d be the Commandress-in Chief, so to speak!
Ms. Fiorina: If you think Hillary-
JH: Mr. Carson, your thoughts?
Mr. Carson: I'd just like to thank everyone for being here tonight.
JH: Enough out of the homophobic Uncle Tom, already!

                                                                      Ad Infinitem…FADE
                (The previous was not an actual transcript, it was a blend of actual dialogue and fictional comments. Although, the moderator’s ‘performance’ was so outrageous, it really doesn’t make much difference).

Europe In The Balance, On The Brink

                The dwindling U.S. military contingent in Europe has been forced to borrow British helicopters and conduct training exercises with equipment loaned by other NATO members due to budget cutbacks, the Telegraph (of London) reported recently.
                Incredibly, America no longer has a single tank in Europe, while the number of U.S. troops stationed there has decreased by more than a third just since 2012. Moreover, the article went on to state that many of the weapons used for NATO exercises must now be rotated between bases in the U.S. and in Europe.
                The Pentagon has been hamstrung by steep budget cuts, particularly in the last few years of the second Obama administration. This, combined with the fact that what resources are available have been increasingly sent elsewhere, to places like the Middle East and Asia, has led to a truncated and increasingly impotent American military presence on the Continent.
                Unfortunately, yet predictably, the American retrenchment has been met with growing Russian aggression.
                Lt. General Ben Hodges, Commanding General of American forces in Europe, told the Telegraph that America no longer has the “intelligence capacity to do what we need to do” and that, as a result, has been surprised by Russia’s actions in the Ukraine and Syria.
                With a downtrodden, disheveled America now aimlessly wandering around Europe asking “Buddy, can you spare a helicopter?” and hundreds of thousands of immigrants pouring across European borders from the Middle East and Africa,  including untold numbers of potential terrorists,  it is well past time for the Continent to wake the hell up and save its own self.
                I, for the most part, love “Europe” and its member countries. Americans and Europeans have long shared a common ancestry and a common enemy. Many of us have fought and died together- several times. But it is long past time for the nations of the European Union to take back more responsibility for their own defense. In fact, there is precious little time left for them to do so. Russia is re-emerging as a danger at the same time as several new existential threats arise.                                                                                                    The aging of the populace is a serious threat in and of itself, but Europe cannot possibly survive the continued onslaught of Muslim immigrants. Even if this doesn’t lead to many more sleeper cells embedded on the Continent and vastly more terror attacks in the future, it will still be the end of Europe and its storied history in advancing the plight of mankind. The skyrocketing numbers of Muslims, disenfranchised or not, with their much, much higher birth/fertility rates will eventually simply subsume existing cultures.
                Western nations have bent over backward to accommodate- and not offend- Muslim minorities.  In many cases Western societies have changed their behavior in order to avoid appearing rigid or superior. What will happen to these nations when Muslims are the majorities?  Anyone who has read the Koran and knows even a little about Sharia law understands that it is utterly and absolutely incompatible with a free and open society. It pains me to the core to say this, but it is a simple fact and the defining issue of our time.
                The countries that brought the world the Enlightenment, the Magna Carta, the Sistine Chapel, Beethoven and the Louvre- and discovered America- will simply and tragically be devoured.  Ironically, both historic Christendom and modern secular Europe will be eviscerated if they cannot find the will to defend themselves.
                Toughen up, Europe!  Just because some holier-than-thou, political-correctness-besotted pseudo- academic calls you a racist or a bigot doesn’t mean you are one.
                And that is the biggest threat to your continued existence: progressive “liberal” politicians in power in your countries that will not tolerate views that differ from their own, even as they tolerate the decline and fall of the countries they lead. That is another commonality between America and Europe. We now share that threat, as well.

                Rise up, Europe. Remember this quote from one of your finest leaders. Tell your modern day appeasers, “You have sat here too long for any good you may be doing. Depart, I say, and let us have done with you! In the name of God, go!”

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

God Is Dead In Katy, Texas Classroom

Katy, Texas –
                Jordan Wooley,  a  seventh-grade student at West Memorial Junior High School,  is standing up for her religious beliefs after she alleged her teacher forced students to deny that God is real, and threatened them with failing grades if they didn’t agree.
                Jordan testified at a school board meeting on the evening of October 26th,  in regards to an assignment in her reading class that caused a significant controversy. In that testimony, she expressed  concern and frustration about her teacher’s attempts to indoctrinate her students into atheism.
                “Today I was given an assignment in school that questioned my faith and told me that God was not real. Our teacher had started off saying that the assignment had been giving problems all day. We were asked to take a poll to say whether God is fact, opinion or a myth and she told anyone who said fact or opinion was wrong and God was only a myth,” she told board members.
                Wooley claimed that many students immediately objected, but, good tolerant liberal that she is, the teacher refused to consider their position.
                 I have a more complete list of poll questions- to be given to Jordan’s teacher. Her answers should be illuminating. (In the interests of fairness, I had the N.E.A. approve of questions 1, 2 and 10).
1)      Is God a fact, opinion or myth? (Duh!)
2)      Is global warming a fact, opinion or myth? (Remember, the science is settled!)
3)      Is the statement that “a classical liberal education should not tell students what to think, but teach them how to think” a fact, opinion or myth?
4)      Is “free” healthcare & education a fact, opinion or myth?
5)      Is the statement “those who can…do, and those who can’t…teach” fact, opinion or myth? ;)
6)      Democrats are the party of the poor and working class: fact, opinion or myth?
7)      President Obama is a better president than Calvin Coolidge: fact, opinion, myth or ‘who the hell was Calvin Coolidge?!’
8)      President Obama is a better president than Jimmy Carter: fact, opinion, myth or ‘It’s a trick question, it’s a tie!’
9)      Fidel Castro, Che Guevara and Louis Farrakhan are/were great men, but Christopher Columbus, Benjamin Netanyahu and Andrew Jackson are/were louts: fact, opinion, myth, or ‘I don’t recognize any of these names, did you use spell check?!’
10)   Abortion is simply a form of birth control vital to a woman’s overall health, but eating animal meat is murder: fact (correct answer), opinion (I’d be careful if I were you!), myth or ‘who cares?’


Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Darwinism: The Evolution of Intolerance

*”I lost my job at George Mason University for teaching the problems with evolution. Lots of scientists question evolution, but they would lose their jobs if they spoke out.”- Caroline Crocker, as quoted in the Washington Post, February 5, 2006.

*”The only appropriate response should involve some form of righteous fury, much butt-kicking, and the public firing of some teachers, many school-board members, and vast numbers of sleazy far-right politicians…It’s time for scientists to break out the steel-toed boots and brass knuckles, and get out there and hammer on the lunatics and idiots.”- Paul Z. Myers, University of Minnesota professor, in a typically tolerant, reasoned rant… that clearly isn’t ‘hate speech!’

                When a teacher or public school decides to inform students that Darwinism is a theory, not a proven fact, and opts to, say, teach both evolution and creationism, Darwinists become apoplectic and usually manage to have the decision declared unconstitutional.
                Courts have ruled that teaching intelligent design in public school classes violates the Establishment Clause of the First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States because, “intelligent design is not science” and "cannot uncouple itself from its creationist, and thus religious, antecedents.” First off, teaching the theory of intelligent design does not establish a religion. Preventing that theory  from being taught does, however, by definition, prevent the free exercise of “religion” and abridges freedom of speech. Secondly, if intelligent design is untrue and impossible simply because it is not “science,” that leaves us in a bit of a lurch. “Science” did not create the universe, itself, or anything else.

                Evolution does not explain creation. By definition, it is simply a theory about what came after.

                Why should this extreme hatred and intolerance of any skepticism or questioning of the theory of evolution have come about? After all, this is supposedly science we’re talking about. Those are vital aspects of the vaunted scientific method itself.
                 Perhaps it has ‘evolved’ as the best way to foster and preserve the Darwinists power and esteem.
                ”Molecular machines display a key signature or hallmark of design, namely, irreducible complexity. In all irreducibly complex systems in which the cause of the system is known by experience or observation, intelligent design or engineering played a role in the origin of the system…We find such systems within living organisms.”- Scott A. Minnich and Stephen C. Meyer, Second International Conference on Design & Nature, 2004.

Monday, October 26, 2015

The Chinese Communist Party Bans Immorality

                 According to a Yahoo Sports on-line report, China’s Communist Party has officially banned its approximately 88 million members from “extravagant eating and drinking,” engaging in “improper sexual relationships with others” and “playing golf,” Chinese state media reported Thursday.
                Good luck with that.
                 The ruling party’s Political Bureau adopted the new rules on clean governance and discipline earlier this month, the official Xinhua news agency said, calling the measures “a moral ethical code that members must abide by.”
                The ‘Chinese Communist Party,’ the largest political party on earth, now seems like no ‘party’ at all, an oriental oxymoron if you will. Xinhua reported that party members were already barred from “keeping paramours and conducting adultery,” but stated the new rule on sexual activity was stricter.
                If the Republican and Democratic parties in the United States imposed these same rules on their members, the Independent Party would be the largest in the land. Fringe party membership would swell and write-in ‘candidates’ would have a real chance at getting elected.
                Hell, the Democratic Party was practically founded on “improper sexual relationships with others,” which may explain their inordinate fondness for abortions. Both parties have historically been guilty of “extravagant eating and drinking,” on the taxpayers dime, of course. The sin of “playing golf” used to be more of a Republican failing, but has of late afflicted more and more Democrats, especially those who have ascended to the Executive branch.

                Under these rules there would currently be no American government. Ironically (at first blush), the last American president that had that strict of an ethical code- a code that he himself chose to live by-  was that staunch anti-communist, Ronald Reagan.

Sunday, October 25, 2015

Los Angeles Citizens Punished For Conserving Water

                 The Los Angeles Department of Water and Power will hike rates to cover some of its lost revenue, its board decided Tuesday. Why has it experienced the drop in revenue you ask? Because consumers have done what they’ve been instructed to do by their governmental masters: conserve water during this recent four-year drought. Many consumers are taking much shorter showers than in the past and have even replaced their yards with drought-tolerant landscaping, among other measures to limit water usage.
                The result of this sacrifice, this community spirit, this massive conservation effort is that consumers will have to pay more money to make up for their conservation! Less water purchased from the utilities has meant less revenues for them as well, with many now operating in the red. Officials now claim that they need to pass some of the costs back to customers.
                “The reality is that rate increases, surcharges and other pricing adjustments are part of the drought story this year,” Association of California Water Agencies spokeswoman Lisa Lien-Mager said. As revenues drop, utilities still must cover fixed costs, and keep paying employees, maintaining pipes, treatment facilities, aqueducts and reservoirs. They have also incurred additional costs during the drought, for ‘public outreach’ and ‘enforcing’ water-use restrictions. Get that? They’ve taken money that their customers have paid in and used it to badger them into using less water…and then raised these same customers rates because they did!! Where is the outrage??!
                Neil Guglielmo, a Los Angeles Department of Water and Power budget official, said “Our customers have done a tremendous job of conserving water, which is great for the city, but it means there is an impact to our financials.”
                Yes, well, in a free market, supply and demand would rule. Private companies must lower rates when demand falls. And, whenever private companies raise their rates, for whatever reason, government hounds them and lectures them about ‘greed’ and the ‘plight of the less fortunate.’ Private companies must react to falling demand by innovating, increasing efficiencies and/or laying off employees, all of which are anathema to government. Government will never shrink itself, or even go on a diet, though it expects any business not “too big to fail” to starve to death.
                So, apparently, it is okay for the government to raise rates because of the falling demand that it caused, but it’s not okay for private companies to raise rates for legitimate reasons when their cost of doing business increases.

                Incredible. Hypocrisy, thy name is government.

Saturday, October 24, 2015

North Korea Proclaims Itself Ready For 'Any Kind Of War' With The U.S.

            The Hermit Kingdom’s Kim II-Sung Square, in Pyongyang, was recently witness to one of the largest ceremonial displays of military might in that country’s history, according to an article in the Washington Post.
            In his first public speech in nearly three years, North Korea’s 'Dear Leader,' Kim Jong-un, made up for lost time with an exceptionally belligerent tone and a 'special' message for the North’s traditional enemy.
            “Our party dauntlessly declares that our revolutionary armed forces are capable of fighting any kind of war provoked by the U.S.,” the doughy dictator proclaimed to ‘rapturous applause’ from thousands of top military officers and party officials assembled below his viewing platform, stated the article.
            North Korea,  routinely suffering from delusions of adequacy, frequently threatens to wipe out South Korea and the United States, yet this speech was notable as it was particularly vehement and delivered in front of a contingent of invited international guests.
            Tens of thousands of participants gathered in the Square, named after Kim’s grandfather, waving flags and flowers. A large banner above the square, slung from a gas-filled balloon read: “Long live the invincible Workers’ Party of Korea.”

            Two things struck me about this last fact. One, if the Workers’ Party of Korea was actually invincible, it would not require banners bidding it a long life. Also, it is often difficult to discern the difference between a gas-filled balloon and the “Dear Leader” himself.

Friday, October 23, 2015

Swedish Knife Attack

                 Swedish authorities said a 21-year-old man armed with “a sword or a large knife” entered a school in Trollhattan, killed a teacher and a student and wounded two other people before he was fatally shot by police. The attack occurred in the Kronogarden district, a heavily immigrant neighborhood in the struggling industrial city that lies approximately 45 miles north of Gothenburg, and sent shock-waves around the normally placid nation.
                “This is a dark day for Sweden,” stated the country’s Prime Minister, Stefan Lofven.
                Swedish news media reported that the suspect was wearing a mask and that some of the students initially thought he was pulling a Halloween prank.

                Swedish politicians reacted swiftly to the tragedy, banning the sale, manufacture and distribution of all swords, Halloween costumes and knives with sharp or serrated blades. Butter knives can still be legally purchased, though there is now a 5-day waiting period.
                (A firearm was the hero in this tragic event, stopping the murderer and likely preventing many more deaths and injuries. I doubt the media will point this out).


Thursday, October 22, 2015

Joe Biden Opts Out

                This just in: Joe Biden has finally decided not to enter the race to become the 2016 Democratic presidential nominee. This should come as no surprise to any sentient being, for several reasons, the recent tragic death of his son among them.
                That Mr. Biden has- by comparison to the other Democratic Party candidates- some appealing qualities, was never going to be the deciding factor. He actually appears to be human. He makes the occasional gaff, like George W. Bush did, but, much like Bush, he exhibits real emotion and genuine empathy at times.
                However, the Billary Clintons were never going to allow his entry into the race to be an easy one. You can be sure that Clinton Foundation back-channel communications put ‘subtle’ pressure on Mr. Biden- and his family and support network- to take into account all factors before deciding to enter this race. The Clinton Mafia may have distributed some stills of a lifeless Vincent Foster to strengthen their argument.

                The corrupt, criminal Democratic legacies of Aaron Burr, William Marcy Tweed, the Pendergasts, Richard Daley and Tammany Hall live on, even as the Biden candidacy is aborted in its infancy.

Canada Elects Justin Trudeau

                                                              Oh, Canada!

                What hast thou done? I know it is easy to get bored with a lover- or a leader- after a few years go by and they don’t appear to change or be hip. I mean, how exciting can that be? But, sometimes, consistency is resolve, real belief and a sign of character and substance. That was true of Stephen Harper, even though he was cantankerous at times.
                So now what, Canadians? Justin Trudeau is a ‘hunk,’ but do you really believe all those pretty promises will come to fruition? Is legalizing marijuana really a critical policy issue? So you’re not going to bother with fighting ISIL/ISIS and you are going to go all in on deficit spending to stimulate your economy?
                 You obviously have decided that you want to be just like the United States?!! We might as well merge! We’d be the largest country on earth and still not be a viable military threat to our enemies. At least we could now jointly not use our vast resources together. You may still be the ‘True North,’ but forget about the ‘strong and free’ part in a few years. Kumbaya!
                Soon you’ll be lobbying for the NHL to be a ‘touch hockey’ league to avoid injuries. (It almost is now).

                You couldn’t have done much worse if you’d elected Garry Trudeau. Eh?

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Pregnancy, Choice, Abortion And The Death Of... Logic

                 If a woman smokes a cigarette or drinks a glass of wine during her pregnancy, that is considered unacceptable, a crime against nature, and she is sure to be reprimanded by someone at some level at some time. That is just not done. Only a selfish, unfeeling potential parent would do that. The baby’s health could be adversely affected!
                However, if she decides to kill the child a little later via an abortion… that is her inherent right…her choice you intolerant bastard!! That’s right, her choice is that her baby doesn’t have one…and also that you shut the hell up, too. If you try to exercise your First Amendment rights to simply disagree, you will be accused of promoting intolerance, sexism, bigotry, and hate speech. Some will say you hate women and want to take away their ‘health care.’(Liberals, like Nazis, love euphemisms!).
                Let me see if I have this straight: a woman has the right to do whatever she wants with her own body. Except to sip a glass of wine or smoke a cigarette if she’s pregnant. It is okay, however, to simply choose to ‘terminate’ the pregnancy if she so desires.



                (No one has the right to do whatever they wish with their own bodies. People don’t have the ‘right’ to commit a crime and benefit from it. (Unless they are an illegal alien). Men don’t have the right to get drunk and drive themselves home nor the right to hold up a bank. I know people who’ve been fined for jaywalking! “I was just exercising my right to do what I want with my own body” won’t work as an excuse if you shoot a famous African lion. Kill your kid, that’s okay. “I didn’t pay my taxes because I’m pro choice…and my choice was not to pay them” won’t cut it with the authorities, either).

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

God And Magnets At UCLA

            According to an article in the U.K. Express, the journal “Social Cognitive And Affective Neuroscience” (I am a long time subscriber!) published the results of a recent study under a headline reading, “Scientists claim they can change your belief on immigrants and God- with MAGNETS.”
            How might they do this? By utilizing a technique called “transcranial magnetic stimulation” (TMS) researchers can shut down certain groups of “neurons” in the brain. Researchers recount an experiment which they claim can “make Christians no longer believe in God and make Britons open their arms to migrants.” Well done, lads, well done, indeed! Just what the doctor ordered!
            The article went on to state that, in essence, these scientists hope that “in the future, belief in God, or in some other politically incorrect question that might…lead to ‘zealous acts,’ can be treated, maybe even cured, by magnet zappings.” (This could lead to an entirely new definition of ‘magnet schools!’). The scientists looked at how the brain resolves abstract ideological problems. They say that their research suggests our brains use the same basic mental pathways to solve practical problems such as following directions that they do to analyze ideological issues such as immigration and religion. Lead author Dr. Colin Holbrook, from the University of California at Los Angeles, said: "These findings are very striking, and consistent with the idea that brain mechanisms that evolved for relatively basic threat-response functions are re-purposed to also produce ideological reactions."
                         Rampant political-correctness in our schools and our mainstream media has already lobotomized a large percentage of the American populace and has attempted to put mental straitjackets on everyone else. This, however, takes thought-policing to the next level. This combines the worst elements of Nazi propaganda, eugenics, Stasi nosiness, and the Soviet Union’s branding of anyone disagreeing with the party line as “crazy” and in need of state provided mental help.
             “You don’t like zis president? Nein? Perhaps you are, how you say, unwell in ze head, ja? Ve have vays of making you all better!”
            This is as scary as it gets, folks. And it’s no coincidence that they picked Christianity and aversion to illegal immigration as mental illnesses in need of “curing.”
            If the civilized world is to be saved, and if we wish freedom rather than slavery to reign in our future, every sane person must resist this sort of perverted, stultifying, ‘scientific’ insanity.
            No matter what.

Monday, October 19, 2015

Alcoholic State Lottery Official Claims Discrimination

                 Johnene Canfield, a former Minnesota State Lottery official who was recently fired for various performance issues now claims she was discriminated against due to her alcoholism. That ridiculous claim is actually rooted in long-standing disability law, according to Teresa Nelson, the legal director for the American Civil Liberties Union of Minnesota. Last week, the former official sued the state, including the State Lottery Executive Director, for firing her despite knowing she was disabled as the result of her alcoholism. Canfield is also alleging gender discrimination in the suit.
                On Monday, December 15th, 2014, at 3 p.m., Ms. Canfield’s car crossed the center line of the highway she was driving on and struck an oncoming car head-on. A 73 year-old man was seriously injured in the crash. Her blood alcohol level was nearly three times the legal limit. This was her second DUI. Canfield, the Minnesota State Lottery Assistant Director, told officers that she was on her way to pick up her children from school! She has been accused of even more outrageous behavior during her time as a government lottery bigwig.
                Yet the ACLU’s Nelson said that even though alcohol dependency is not spelled out in the 1990 Americans with Disabilities Act or Minnesota’s equivalent law, regulatory agencies and courts have interpreted chemical dependency as qualifying for disability status.
                Essentially everything is a disability now, as nothing could ever be anyone’s fault, or within anyone’s control. This dovetails nicely with the banishment of the Ten Commandments, the abasing of the individual and the supremacy of the Nanny State.
                I myself have a “disability” that I surely shouldn’t be fired or blamed for. It’s horrifying to me and causes me inexpressible anguish. You see, I am a victim. I, through no fault of my own, just don’t like to work. I’m sure it’s a genetic thing, even though all my predecessors have been particularly hard-working individuals.
                I’m retaining a lawyer. I will bring a lawsuit on behalf of lazy people everywhere. The ACLU will be with me every indolent, lethargic, step of the way.

                Rest assured, my friends. Rest assured. Lazy people’s lives matter.

Playboy Magazine Declares, "No Nudes Is Good News"

                 Is nothing sacred anymore? Playboy magazine has just announced that it will no longer contain pictures of beautiful naked women. Apparently, the ease of pulling up similar images on the internet, for free, was one of the factors leading to the publisher’s decision. From now on, people subscribing to the iconic publication really will be doing so for the articles.
                Good luck with that.
                Since the 1950’s innumerable adolescent males have learned about female anatomy and had their libidos lathered while paging through each issue, eventually opening up the ‘Playmate of the Month’ centerfold and gazing at it in awe, as if it were a map pointing the way to buried treasure. The ‘cool’ and ‘hip’ boys somehow managed to get their hands on a Playboy magazine, while the lesser lights made do with National Geographic.
                There was no comparison. Unless one liked sags and wrinkles.
                What’s next? Burger King announcing it will no longer sell burgers? Kentucky Fried Chicken averring that it will now offer only tofu products? Toys ‘R’ Us dropping toys and selling only firearms and  chainsaws? The New York Review of Books eschewing words and going with sketches of beloved Hanna-Barbara cartoon characters from here to eternity?
                And, with no more newly-minted Playmates or bunnies, what happens to the Playboy mansion? Eventually, it will be much, much larger than needed. The ‘Love Shack’ will be superfluous at some point. My guess is it will one day be purchased and turned into a ‘mega-Mosque.’

                Oh well, I suppose it’s just as easy to hide an I-Pad under the mattress.

Sunday, October 18, 2015

U.S. Navy Attacks 'Male Privelege'

                 The United States navy, while not possessing as much as a single, active ship that has ever sunk any enemy’s counterpart, is boldly and aggressively attacking  “male privilege” in its own ranks. Its Bureau of Medicine and Surgery is instructing sailors on how to avoid said behavior thru such vehicles as the “Power and Control Wheel” and the “Equality Wheel.”
                The “Power and Control Wheel’s” illumination of what constitutes male privilege includes, “treating her like a servant,” “making the big decisions,” and “refusing to pick up milk on your way home because it’s ‘women’s work’.” Powerful, poignant and apropos points all I’m sure, but WTF?! I mean, WTF??!!
                What does it matter that our navy isn’t tasked with repelling or destroying our enemies, as long as they can sink male privilege?! Before we get too carried away by this torpedoing of macho males, let’s consider some facts.
                The marines have recently finished a study that showed that, on average, in every measurable category, women simply are not as fast, strong or effective as their male counterparts when it comes to necessary war-fighting skills and behaviors, and that this would lead to many, many lives lost if they were 'allowed' to serve as front-line combatants.
                “Male privilege,” for its part, has historically resulted in many, many millions of males dying in wars throughout the world, whereas, until now, females weren’t 'allowed' in combat units.
                I would hope that we could all agree that having our military effectively defend our nation and all her people would take precedence over using it to experiment with social-engineering.

                I would be wrong. 

               This is not your father's navy. It's not even McHale's Navy.

               John Paul Jones, David Farragut and "Bull" Halsey must be rolling in their graves.


The U.S. Unemployment Rate And Other White Lies

                The U.S. government simply no longer counts as unemployed those who have given up looking for work. Only the government, or Hillary Clinton, former and aspiring government worker, can get away with this kind of chutzpa. So, when it claims, say, a 5.2% unemployment rate, the actual rate may be 10.4%... or more.
                Good gig if one can get it. It now can- and does- dramatically and deliberately misrepresent a key economic performance indicator and doesn’t get called on the carpet for it, isn’t held accountable. This is like being a global warming climatologist/alarmist! Ignore things that do exist and make up things that don’t.

                I’m going to start acting accordingly. I mean, what’s good for the government… is good for the people, right?  So, for example, if my buddy takes out a full case of beer and lays all the cans out individually on the kitchen table and asks me how many cans there are, I may say 10. He’ll likely reply, “What? Are you partially blind, crazy or dumb? Look again! There are 24!” To which I’ll respond, “That doesn’t matter because I stopped counting at 10, therefore there are 10 cans on the table. Don’t question me! By-the-way, do you still have a job? Yes? Give me 30% of your income.”

Saturday, October 17, 2015

Obama Accidentally Bombs Doctors Without Borders Hospital

                Last week, the Obama administration ‘accidentally’ attacked a Doctors Without Borders hospital in Kunduz, Afghanistan, killing at least 22 and wounding scores of others. And they probably don’t even have Obamacare!
                In response to the tragedy, the President basically said, “My bad! Sorry!” The media quickly let it pass and went on to more important stories. I mean, it’s not like he shot a lion.
                Can you imagine what the mainstream media would be saying today if it was George W. Bush, Richard Nixon or Ronald Reagan that was responsible for this act??! 

                But, it was a Democrat that committed it, and Obama was given a pass much as Bill Clinton was for accidentally bombing the Chinese Embassy in Belgrade, Yugoslavia in 1999. Clinton, too, later apologized. (“I never bombed that embassy, never…not one time.” A few days later: “ Indeed I did engage in inappropriate acts with that embassy. I’m sorry. But I was bombed, too, if you catch my drift ;)”).

Friday, October 16, 2015

Western University Bans 'Violent' Words And Phrases

Western University in London, England, is attempting to ban the use of “violent” words and phrases, and/or at least shame those vulgar enough to use them. Helpfully, the school has been very specific in communicating just which words and phrases are offensive and potentially damaging.
Among the most unspeakably heinous utterances (and the University’s first-person reasoning for deeming them so):
*skinny: “I don’t say ‘skinny,’ as it is not validating.”
*get over it: “I don’t tell people to ‘get over it’ because it ignores the long-lasting impacts of certain life experiences.” (In fact, in anticipating such violent terminology, the University would put a ‘trigger warning’ prior to the offending statement to warn folks that there is ‘danger ahead.’).
*blind: “I don’t say I was ‘blind to something,’ as it ignores the experiences of differently abled individuals.”
*whitewashed: “I don’t say ‘whitewashed’ because it is used to insult those who do not conform to negative stereotypes of a community or culture.” (What the hell?).
*”We don’t say ‘freak’ because it reduces certain identities and encourages the perpetuation of violence.”
*”I don’t call people ‘gingers’ because a unique hair colour does not make one inferior.” (‘Ginger’ is a hair colour? A unique one? Like Ginger’s on Gilligan’s Island? That makes her and her color-mates inferior??!).
*”We don’t say ‘spirit animal’ because it is a form of cultural appropriation.” (I don’t even know what that means, but it is obviously not bad on its face, and if we ‘appropriated’ it from another culture, well, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery).
*”I don’t ask ‘who wears the pants in your relationship?’ because it expects homosexual couples to subscribe to heterosexual norms.” (“Subscribe?” Really? True, in many homosexual pairings neither partner wears pants. Perhaps it would be more appropriate to ask them, ‘who’s the pitcher and who’s the catcher you guys?’ or ‘who wears the strap-on in your relationship?’).

Western University, here’s the skinny: radical freaks have whitewashed your institution and made you blind to the fact that Ginger would wear the pants in your spirit animal family.

Get over it!

Thursday, October 15, 2015

The S.S. United States

                The world’s fastest ocean-liner, Titanic-sized super-ship the S.S. United States, once ferried presidents, Hollywood mega-stars, and even the Mona Lisa. Yet this mammoth and noble craft may soon be relegated to the junk heap. A preservationist group saved the vessel from being scrapped a few years ago and is now working with a developer to give the mothballed behemoth new life as a stationary waterfront real estate development in New York City, the ship’s home port in her heyday.
                Those plans, however, may themselves be scrapped due to a lack of money. In fact, the S.S. United States Conservancy has recently authorized a ship broker to explore her potential sale to a recycler. The “Big U,” as the ship is called, is longer than three football fields. It was a marvel of technology and elegance throughout the 1950’s and 1960’s, and offered regular passenger service between New York and Europe. Her maiden voyage, in 1952, broke trans-Atlantic speed records. She was so fast, in fact, that her propellers were a Cold War state secret.
                The ship has approximately 600,000 square feet of floor space and was conceived to provide luxury passenger service to and from Europe and to quickly convert into a superfast military transport, if necessary. The vast vessel was a powerful expression of American postwar optimism and ambition.
                Faster passenger jets ushered in an era of air travel and led to the downfall of ocean-going super-liners. The S.S. United States left service prior to 1970. Currently, she is docked in Philadelphia, stripped of her innards and rusting away in the Delaware River.

                She is a powerful expression of American pessimism, retrenchment and retraction in the Obama Era.

              The hulking S.S. “United States,” once the envy of the world, now literally and figuratively has lost her bearings- and her guts- and sits idly by, hoping to somehow avoid ending up on the scrap heap of history.

Debbie Wasserman Schultz Claims Republicans Want To "Kick Women"

             Debbie Wasserman Schultz, Democratic National Committee Chair, recently stated that she believes the remaining Republican presidential candidates are trying to ‘out right-wing’ each other. I wish that were the case. She opined again that they are trying to ‘out-Trump’ Donald Trump.
            In reality, a place I’m not sure Wasserman Schultz has ever visited, it is the viable Democratic candidates that are trying to ‘out-left wing’ each other. Bernie Sanders is a socialist for crying-out-loud! As I’ve laid out in a previous post, ‘mainstream’ Democrats now believe in only a handful of things, including taking freedom and money away from those who’ve earned them, importing vast numbers of illegal voters to ensure their own perpetual power- as well as the country’s ruination- and protecting the God-given right to kill babies.
            Hillary Clinton- among numerous other Democrats of late- has had to publicly change her long held beliefs in order to get ‘right’ with the new ‘in’ crowd of radical leftists. She has renounced her former views on marriage, gay rights and other topics in order to be more electable to those in the vast left-wing conspiracy that is the media-special-interest-group complex.
            Wasserman Schultz actually opined that Republicans are saying, “Yeah, let’s kick women. Let’s kick them and immigrants out of this country. Let’s take away health care from women.”
            On top of the poor grammar, that is hate speech, as opposite of the truth as it is absurd. When has any Republican suggested “kicking women out of the country.”
            “Sorry, honey, but you and our daughters are off to Somalia…or wherever. It’s your choice. Whatever, you can’t stay here! But first, I’m going to kick you!” Might be a little lonely for them with no women around. And who would clean and cook for these supposedly sexists louts?
            And take away health care from women? So abortion is the only real women’s health care issue now? Forget cancer (and all those male athletes wearing pink this month to support the fight against breast cancer!), obesity, stroke, Alzheimer’s, etc. Abortion is health care?
             It’s not exactly ‘health care’ for the baby… or any of ‘its’ potential offspring… in perpetuity. An infinite number of potential choices were taken away by that one choice now.

            I can’t wait for the modern remake of that popular ‘80’s and ‘90’s television series, “Murder, She Wrote.”
            I hear that Wasserman Schultz will take the place of Angela Lansbury. The updated series will reflect modern sensibilities and be called, “Health Care, She wrote.”


Democratic Terrorists

                The Democratic Party is, through its now preferred and proffered policies, literally bent on the destruction of the United States. Most of its leading politicians really don’t care what happens to the country as long as they remain in control.
                We have long been worried about, and rightly so, foreign extremist’s sleeper cells in our midst.
                The Democrat’s actions often tend to aid and abet foreign entities- both statist and tribal- in their desire to inflict harm on the nation. Yet, perhaps they are jealous.
                The Party’s insistence on dismantling the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, its punishment of those who work, plan, save and succeed, its obsession with illegally importing millions of people who have no knowledge of- or love for- liberty and Western Civilization and its desire to remake marriage and gender are nothing less than a death knell for the U.S.
                And, speaking of death, the party’s sanctioning of ‘abortion then, abortion now,  and abortion forever,’ cheapens life and dishonors the Founders, as well.
                The biggest sleeper cell is here, now, in this country. And in power.
                Domestic terrorist?

                Thy name is Democrat.

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

The Democratic 'Debate': The Fix Is In

                 The Democrats finally had a ‘debate’ last night. Sort of. The three lesser lights would’ve made Elmer Fudd appear dazzling by comparison. I’ve been more excited by hat racks.
                Anderson Cooper, a Clinton Foundation member, moderated/hosted the debate. No problem there. What conflict of interest? He and CNN made it clear before the debate that, unlike what transpired during the Republican debates, they would not be pitting the candidates against each other nor attempt to trip them up by asking them tricky questions such as the names of various world leaders. Also, candidates past statements about each other would not be brought up in an attempt to cause discomfort and rancor.
                This was in stark contrast to the Republican debates on Fox News Channel that illustrated real differences amongst the candidates, most of whom were animated, engaged, passionate and real. Personality and policy differences were often clear and compelling. Megyn Kelly famously went after Donald Trump. And  after him. And after him. Unlike CNN and, worse yet, MSNBC, Fox News really is ‘fair and balanced.’ (It is no wonder polls reveal the network to be America’s most trusted news source).
                Hillary, as per usual, blithely dismissed her scandals. However, this most wooden of people/candidates actually appeared somewhat animated and almost human at times. The curmudgeonly old socialist helped her out by ranting about how sick he was of hearing about the ‘damn’ e-mails, occasioning the front runner to thank him and shake his hand. Yes, Bernie wanted to talk about “the issues.”
                What he really was saying was,” the hell with honesty and character, the hell with fair play and transparency. And the hell with national security! Let’s talk about things that matter!”
                To Democrats, the only ‘issues’ are how much freedom and money they can take away from working people, how many illegal new voters they can import and how easy it is to exterminate babies.
                Ironically, while the Republicans in congress preemptively surrender to their Democratic counterparts, the Republican presidential candidates squabble amongst themselves in a vain attempt to give the people choices.
                The Democrats never jeopardize- nor waiver on- the issues that matter to them.
                The fix is in.

                There is no debate.

Shirt Control- Part II

Aubrey, Texas-

                Eleven year old twins Kaidence and Abigail were born on an air force base. Their father, Phil Rolen, is a now disabled Iraq war veteran.
                They recently went to school wearing new “U.S. Air Force” hoodies. The girl’s teachers were not amused. “She yelled at me and said that’s out of the dress code and that she would get me in trouble if I wore something out of the dress code,” said Kaidence. Father Phil called the school’s principle and was told that the Air Force logo itself was not the issue, but that the logos were larger than the district’s code allows.
                Really? In this era of tattoos and piercings, pants and boxers hanging down to the floor, and vulgar, explicit expressions on kids and adults apparel, schools are on the lookout for ‘over-sized’ Air Force logos? That they can’t tolerate!
                “Bob, apprehend those girls, the logo on their sweatshirts must be nearly two inches too large!”

                Burkas and keffiyehs are perfectly fine, however. As are shirts depicting the image of Che Guevara.

To quote the Doors, “This is the end…”


Tuesday, October 13, 2015

Dexter McCarty, Public Schools And 'Shirt Control'

Gresham, Oregon-

                Dexter McCarty Middle School student Alan Holmes has a brother who joined the marines at the age of 19 and served a tour in Iraq. Alan recently wore a shirt to school that exhibited a traditional soldier memorial and read, “Standing For Those Who Stood For Us.” The shirt depicted a military rifle, barrel first into the ground, partially covered by a helmet on top and a pair of boots below.
                This image is meant to honor buried American soldiers. The ‘weapon’ is used to hold the helmet of the slain soldier when buried in the field, the firearm also taking the place of a cross or other grave marker.
                School officials, however, took umbrage at the visage and told Holmes that the shirt was ‘inappropriate’ because it contained a weapon. They asked him to don a ‘school shirt’ instead. He refused. They told him he must either change shirts or face in-school suspension. He chose the latter…and he got it.
                Alan explained, “I was just upset. I was heartbroken. My brother, he means everything to me. Just being able to help and give back to the people who fought and died for us, it just makes me feel good.”
                If you are a Muslim youth- post 9/11 yet- who brings a briefcase trailing wires into your school and avers that it is, in fact, a “clock,” you will be celebrated. Sure, your “time piece” may be briefly confiscated by ‘bigoted’ school officials, but soon the enraged cries of a world citizenry inflamed by mass-media accounts of this ‘miscarriage of justice’ will come to your defense and you will be hailed as a genius and a victim. You will even receive a congratulatory call from the president of the United States of America!
There are no major news networks outraged at the injustice perpetrated against Alan Holmes,  his brother, common sense, or America.
                My guess is that, inexplicably, Alan Holmes won’t receive a phone call from the president.


Monday, October 12, 2015

Columbus Day, Indigenous People's Day

Yesterday was Columbus Day in the United States. Well, actually, many states and towns celebrated “Indigenous People’s Day.” The drive to replace Christopher Columbus with Native Americans and rename the day in honor of the latter is picking up momentum.
                This continent, you see, was a pristine paradise free of alcohol, European diseases, capitalism and, well, white men, before the old seafarer arrived. It was teeming with game and unfettered by fences and Christian ideas of morality. No factories polluted the land, water and sky. And then, HE came along and ruined everything. Suddenly sweat shops, meth labs and Wal-Marts were popping up everywhere, like dandelions in an unkempt yard.
                Funny thing though, every time I hear the libs fantastical fabrications of post-Columbus devastation, I am reminded of how welcoming they now think American citizens should be of all immigrants, legal or illegal, no matter their reasons for wanting to be here. (Get them across the border, onto food stamps and into a voting booth, post haste!).
                Columbus haters, I thought diversity was good, no? Does everybody have to stay within a few hundred yards of where they were born? I thought the “Indians” themselves came across a land bridge from Asia? They weren’t Native Americans, then, were they?! By that “logic” civilization should just have contained itself to Mesopotamia and Egypt, forever and ever, amen. (Some radical professors at colleges around the country would probably have been in favor of that. “The rest of the world reserved for the indigenous animals, yay!” Of course, that would mean that they wouldn’t exist, but, hey, they’re typically pro Planned Parenthood, too, so they are not necessarily logicians).
                Can’t you progressives stop bullying Columbus, stop hating on him? Shouldn’t you be more welcoming and less judgmental? Should the Indians have simply excluded all Europeans?

                Perhaps they should have built a fence.