Wednesday, March 30, 2016

Invasive Species Vs. Illegal Aliens

                There is so much talk of- and concern about- invasive species these days that many people are truly worried about the future of our flora and fauna. Some even see our ecosystems becoming wildly unbalanced and collapsing under the aggressive invaders weight. In the U.S., government bodies big and small are attempting to marshal forces to fend off these illegal alien plant and animal species before it’s too late.
                Oddly, these same government bodies continue to welcome human illegal aliens with open arms. “They add to the diversity, the rich cultural mix of the land we stole from the native Americans…and we are much the better for it,” they say.
                I am hereby going to become the champion of these “invasive” species, the least represented, most repressed and harassed beings on Earth. We are actively trying to exterminate them through various means, such as chemical poisoning! How can this be in 2016 America? This holocaust must cease. To start with, we must immediately abandon use of the term “Invasive species.” (In the eyes of most plants and animals, we are an invasive species!). Hurtful and non-inclusive language is judgmental and can never be reconciled with a progressive society. I suggest that going forward we use the term “undocumented (but valued!) guest life form.”
                It’s not just “tolerance” that’s required. I believe that species like Zebra Mussels, the Round Goby, and Asian Carp should receive blanket amnesty effective as soon as possible. Additionally, I’d like to grant them the right to vote and I’d seriously consider paying them reparations.
                 At worst, until white working male human attitudes and values can be brought into the 21st century, perhaps we could work out an agreement whereby, say, Zebra Mussels would be allowed to colonize 50% of each lake or reservoir, and native species would get the other half. This would at least be a reasonably egalitarian compromise and starting point.


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