9/11 Tribute Dangerous To Birds, Study Says

                Every September 11^th, twin blue beams rise from lower Manhattan and climb towards the heavens, in solemn yet stirring tribute to those killed in the 2001 terrorist attacks. This near-sacred, one-day-a-year observance of those lost in the worst foreign attack on American soil in the nation’s long history may be in jeopardy if the authors of a recently published study are heeded.

                The study, published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences (look for the centerfold!), examined seven years of the annual tributes at the National September 11 Memorial and Museum and concluded that the lights are a potentially fatal attraction to migrating birds. Not outside the realm of possibility, but what is undeniably true is that the twin towers so honored were demonstrably a fatal attraction to Islamic terrorists…and their roughly 3,000 victims.

                Study researchers claim that thousands of birds were drawn to the lights, causing them to waste precious energy circling and risking collisions with buildings or capture by predators. Well, those in Manhattan are certainly familiar with objects in flight colliding with buildings. Oh, and are these birds risking “capture” by airborne predators? If so, why are these predators not at risk because of the lights? Or are they and we just don’t care about them? Could we negotiate for the “captured” birds release?

                The study’s authors recommend that the memorial’s twin blue beams be forever dimmed, and that bright lights around homes, stadiums, offshore oil rigs, and construction sites be turned off during migration season.

                There’s no circling around the fact that, if authorities implement these researcher’s recommendations, our world will be a little darker.

                And, any way you look at it, that decision would be for the birds. 

President Trump Makes Shocking Announcement

September 20, 2019

New Services

(Washington, D.C.)— Just over 48-hours ago President trump announced he had fired National Security Adviser John Bolton. Shortly thereafter, he said he would replace Bolton with Robert C. O’Brien, a lawyer who is a partner in a Los Angeles-based boutique law firm.

Then, earlier this morning-- in a stunning turn of events that had this town buzzing-- Trump announced that he had created a new cabinet position and was hiring Marianne Williamson to be his “Secretary of Peace.” Williamson said she happily gave up on her quest to be the 2020 Democratic presidential nominee to accept the new post, noting she was “ready and willing to start hoping, dreaming and willing the world to be a better place.”

Some pundits asserted that trump only made the hire to prevent Williamson from possibly becoming his opponent in the 2020 general election, prompting Trump to tweet: “I hired Ms. Williamson because of what she can do for our great country. The idea that I did it so we don’t face each other down the line is FAKE NEWS! She didn’t have a prayer anyway, with Pocahontas and that broad from Minnesota…crow-boo-char…or whatever, sucking up the women’s vote now!” He added via a later tweet, “Marianne Williamson will go down in history as the greatest Secretary of Peace this nation has ever had, this I can promise you. Not even close! Not close! Greatest of all time! So there!”

Williamson said she plans to bring her Joan Baez and Joni Mitchell record collection with her to Washington, saying “It would be so cool, such good karma, if the president and the other cabinet members would listen to them with me in the White House.” She added, “I’ve heard Kim Jong-un likes some folk music. Not sure about Vladimir Putin or Xi Jinping. Iran’s Mullahs probably not so much. But there’s always hope.”

The New York Times Blames Planes For 9/11

The New York Times managed to offend the families of those killed on 9/11—and most other reasonable souls—with its description of the attacks eighteen years later. A story in the paper stated: “Once more, families gathered at ground zero, where nearly 3,000 people died on that bright September morning. Once more, there was an outpouring of grief. Once more, there were the sound of bells tolling in mourning and names being recited.”

Here’s how the Times began the story: “Eighteen years have passed since airplanes took aim at the World Trade Center and brought them down.” Those damn airplanes. The progressive bird-cage-liner is now so woke, so politically correct, that it can’t report The Truth. “The newspaper of record” won’t admit it was Al Qaeda terrorists that hijacked the planes and used them—along with hundreds of innocent passengers—to eviscerate the Twin Towers and everyone inside of them.

Blaming objects instead of perpetrators is also of a piece with today’s radical progressivism. I’m surprised Democrats didn’t call for a complete ban on the manufacture and usage of airplanes at the time—or at least a mandatory five-day waiting period to board them. Although, in retrospect, they were probably concerned that taking such action might offend terrorists. Instead, we had to wait the better part of two decades until Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez came along (herself from New York City) before someone seriously proposed doing away with airplanes.

If we had unbiased, stalwart reporting like this during World War II we would have had articles dated September 2^nd, 1939, stating: “tanks, planes and military uniforms launched a surprise attack against Poland yesterday.” On December 8^th, 1941, people would have fetched their newspapers to see bold headlines reading: “Planes Attack Pearl Harbor!”

Bernie Sanders Wants U.S. To Pay For Abortions In Poor Countries

            Democratic presidential candidate Sen. Colonel Bernie Sanders (I-VT) believes climate change poses such a grave risk to the planet that we must do all we can to prevent people from being born. Especially people in “poor countries.” Sen. B.S. suggested that U.S. taxpayers should be tapped to help fund birth control and abortions for women in some developing nations, to help stave off global warming.

Sen. Sanders obviously believes there is just enough of him, but way, way too many of everyone else.

He made the eugenicist-like remarks during CNN’s recent-- and virtually interminable-- “Climate Crisis Town Hall,” in which he appeared with assorted other Democratic presidential hopefuls/asshats. He added, “women in the United States of America, by the way, have a right to control their own bodies and make reproductive decisions.” This is pablum of the first order, nothing more than mental masturbation for “progressives.” No one—male or female-- has the right to do whatever they want with their own bodies, if that behavior could possibly harm others. Or themselves. None of us has the right to drive drunk or club baby seals over the head. Minors don’t even have the right to buy a pack of smokes at the local convenience store. (Though an underaged girl can get an abortion without telling her parents). I can’t hit a person who pisses me off. You can’t legally depress the gas pedal in your car and make it propel you at speeds above the limit. In some places, one person can’t even call a man a man if that man prefers to be called a woman. Progressives don’t even want us to have the right to defend ourselves.

Yet, incredibly, Sanders’ plan to alleviate global warming wasn’t even the craziest of the past week. A Swedish behavioral scientist named Magnus Söderlund, professor of marketing and strategy at the Stockholm School of Economics, spoke in favor of cannibalism at the “Gastro Summit,” a symposium on food choices and availability vis-à-vis a climate apocalypse. Söderlund’s talk was titled “Can you imagine eating human flesh?” The esteemed professor lobbied for the breakdown of taboos against the desecration of human corpses and consumption of other people’s flesh. Call me a skeptic, but this seems to me a difficult marketing strategy to execute. Moreover, though I am well versed in economic theory, I’m not sure I want to know where these supply and demand curves meet.

I’m okay with “save a horse, ride a cowboy.”

“Save the planet, eat your neighbor?” Not so much.

Conservatives Evil, Progressives Good?

Many modern leftists truly believe conservatives are evil. They can see no other reason why somebody would wish to deny other human beings free…well, anything. They fail to understand how someone would risk depriving others of their “right” to live anywhere they want, have everything that anyone else has, choose their own gender or genders—and be free from the consequences of their own actions.

In this way, they actually are evil, or, at minimum, the consequences of their beliefs and actions, even though they choose not to acknowledge them, are consistently, historically, evil. To those they (inadvertently?) victimize, this is a distinction without a difference. I know this is a difficult concept for a decent person to grasp, but it is factually so none-the-less. These leftists claim conservatives are evil and I claim they are evil, so obviously we are equally wrong—or right, depending on one’s perspective, no? This is clearly not how the mainstream media, academia and Big Tech see things. To the Media-Academic Complex, everything those on the left side of the political spectrum believe, do and propose is for purely altruistic reasons, while everything those on the right side of the political spectrum believe, do and propose is done out of intolerance, bigotry, greed or sheer spite.

But it is inarguable that leftists then and now routinely deprive people of their freedoms, the most precious gift of all…or the one that was once thought to be, especially in the United States of America. Leftists impose their will on others because they purport to believe they know what’s best for them. They are the anti-Framers. This is why they slander the Founders, disdain the Constitution, and demand that statues and murals depicting them be removed. They would replace the Declaration of Independence with near total dependence on The State, meaning those like themselves. They try to repeal Natural Law and the inalienable right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness-- granted to us all by the Creator-- by saying that equality of outcome supersedes equality of opportunity and that God doesn’t really exist, is only a construct of ignorant, superstitious, backward rubes in rural wastelands.

They do this so they can replace God with……themselves……and Judeo-Christianity with the hyper-fundamentalist religions of Marxism-Socialism and Secularism. As Churchill said of the ultra-pompous Sir Stafford Cripps, “There but for the grace of God goes God.”

Communism extinguished over 100 million souls in the Twentieth Century alone. It has destroyed the lives of countless others in the two decades since. Western leftists should take a good look at the “quality of life” in “S---hole countries” like Cuba, North Korea and Venezuela, but of course they won’t. They are too busy denigrating the U.S.’s capitalist, free market system that feeds and donates money to much of the rest of the world’s nations to admit that there is a low quality of life—and often no life at all for dissenters—in these glorious “People’s Republics.” 

The United States was “born” by declaring that every person is born with equal rights to pursue human happiness and dignity… and that our rights come from God, not Rod… or Donald, Alexandria, Bernie, Joe, Elizabeth or Hillary. Far too many progressives and nearly all leftists believe that they-- and they alone-- are qualified to bestow rights upon others. They may disdain authority and the successful, yet they act as priest and pastor, judge, jury and executioner. They are the would-be arbiters of our freedoms, secret police waiting for us to carelessly use an incorrect pronoun to address someone in the “nanogender community” or declare that we aren’t convinced that climate change is entirely driven by human activity. They reject the idea of a higher power but are certain we—who could not ask to be created and cannot create ourselves—can choose our own sex.

Arizona Student Identifies As A Hippopotamus

                Florentin Félix Morin is, apparently, a visiting scholar at the University of Arizona. Morin, who is French, started his PhD last year at Université Paris 8, and wrote a piece for the academic Journal of Theoretical Humanities in which he claims to identify as a hippopotamus. He avers that his hippo alter-ego has allowed him to navigate the world free from the constraints that “govern human bodies,” such as gender, sexuality, and age.

                In the article, Morin says he understands that he is not actually a hippopotamus, but that his theoretical exercise of being transspecies, or “tranimal,” gave him comfort while he was coming to terms with his real-life transgenderism. He wrote, “Let me put it this way: something about being a hippo makes me feel cute, confident, sexy, and safe. I discovered that another self was available for me: being a hippo means that I don’t have to be a boy or a girl, a child or an adult, normal or strange.”

            Morin continued: “I do strongly love when my friends call me ‘hippo,’ refer to my ‘paws,’ and pretend that they see no difference between me and one of my stuffed hippopotamuses, except that I’m a little bigger than most of them.”  

                He added: “Unlike the somewhat checkered, locked-down, and policed space of transgender, the space of transspecies remained open, as it is not scripted yet.” Who among us could argue with that? I mean, transgenderism is becoming a somewhat stuffy, traditional, constraining, antediluvian concept, is it not? It’s time to push the boundaries a little! They said space was the final frontier, but “they” were wrong. Think of the possibilities that exist for each of us now that we have finally recognized that we can literally be anyone- or anything- we want to be, allowing us to escape traditional modalities and moralities!

                The University recently denied that Morin was associated with it in any way, despite its website announcement of January 20^th, 2017, in which it welcomed him to the school’s Gender and Women’s Studies Department. The announcement touted him as an exciting addition to the school’s LGBT program, saying that he “works at the intersection of Trans Studies and Animal Studies, focusing on ‘tranimal’ body modifications, practices and subjectivities.”

                And, while he does use male pronouns, Morin says he enjoys correcting people who refer to him as a guy: “When someone…calls me a ‘goofy guy’ I correct them by saying ‘you mean a goofy hippopotamus.’” He does this, he says, in an attempt to “intervene” in what other people “imagine to be my gender.”

                Morin concludes by averring that self-identifying as a hippopotamus is “a political form of resistance to the (trans)gender policing of my body,” and that being a hippo is “the most precious gift that was ever given.”

                Morin is either insane, or one clever man/hippopotamus, drawing us all into his exquisite deceit, illustrating absurdity by being absurd.

                Care to place your bets?

               

"Worm Loves Worm"

            “Worm Loves Worm” is the title of an apparently much-beloved children’s book touting the joys of gay marriage and the ethos of “love is love.” Published in 2016 by Ballsy & Gay Balzer + Bray, goodreads.com says of the subtly doctrinaire publication, “this irresistible picture book is a celebration of love in all its splendid forms.” All its splendid forms? Despite its intention, this is not the case. Love and marriage based on natural complementarity is noticeably not celebrated.

The glowing characterization continues: “You are cordially invited to celebrate the wedding of a worm . . . and a worm. When a worm meets a special worm and they fall in love, you know what happens next…” Let me guess! Wink, wink, nudge, nudge! Just kidding. Get your mind out of the gutter. The review adds: “They get married! But their friends want to know—who will wear the dress? And who will wear the tux? The answer is: It doesn't matter. Because Worm loves Worm.”

Got it? Same sex marriage, transgendered marriage, inter-species marriage…it’s all okay! All the same! Because-- you know-- say it with me now: “LOVE IS LOVE!” Yay!

Reviews of the book, recommended for kids ages 4-8, were almost universally effusive in their praise. One read: “As fathers of a 2-year-old child, my husband and I enthusiastically purchased Worm to Worm and are very happy we did so. It's not easy finding stories that aren't geared toward a mom and a dad - and while we have plenty of those, it's nice to have another book that's a little more reflective of our family.” They noted, of course, that the book “is not political.” Sorry lads, but neither of you are “fathers” of the two-year-old child. Adopted parents, maybe…fathers no. And isn’t it interesting that the two faux dads got the title of the book wrong, stating that they “purchased Worm to Worm?”

“Worm Loves Worm” is a 32-page book directed at young kids. I have taken the liberty of writing a sequel. I hope the author doesn’t mind. Mine is titled “Anything Goes” and is only 1-page in length. Here it is, in its entirety, a special sneak preview for my readers:

“Worm loves worm. Clam loves clam. Soon there are no more humans. The End.”

CNN To Air LGBTQ Town Hall

                If you are among the small group of people who enjoyed CNN’s recent seven-hour televised Town Hall marathon on climate change, in which leading Democratic presidential candidates trotted out ever more preposterous plans to combat climate change, you are in for another treat come October 10^th. The Human Rights Campaign (HRC, but not to be confused with Hillary Rodham Clinton) foundation recently announced that it, too, will host a CNN Democratic presidential town hall. This one will be held in Los Angeles and will focus on issues surrounding the LGBTQ community. The festive extravaganza, taking place on the eve of (the annual) National Coming Out Day, will feature “the largest-ever audience for a Democratic presidential town hall devoted to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (LGBTQ) issues” according to HRC.

                The candidates will field questions regarding how best to promote LGBTQ equality from both CNN “journalists” and the live audience. HRC has announced that Joe Biden, Mayor Pete Buttigieg, Julián Castro, Sen. Kamala Harris, Sen. Amy Klobuchar, and Sen. Elizabeth Warren have already committed to participate. Sounds like Must See TV to me! Fortunately, you won’t have to wait until October 10^th to watch—and listen—to this sure-to-be riveting discussion of all things queer. Through remarkable new technology, called futureport and debuting here, we can listen in to the program even though it will not take place for several weeks! Enjoy!

                                                  [futureport activated}

Question: “Senator Warren, as a woman of color, but a heterosexual, what will you do to aid the plight of the LGBTQIIA+ community?”

Sen. Warren: “This may come as a surprise to you, and possibly my husband Bruce, but I am one-eighth lesbian. Therefore, I will fight for the right of those in the LGBTQ community to use whatever bathrooms they want and do whatever they want, as long as they don’t produce nuclear energy or eat cheeseburgers.” (Applause).

Question: “Mayor Buttigieg, given your last name and the fact that you yourself are gay, do you believe you have the strongest credentials to lead the fight against homophobia and bigotry, especially now that it has been taken to a new level by the Hitler—I mean Trump administration?”

Mayor Buttigieg: “I certainly do. I won’t name names, but there are some who share the floor with me tonight who are actually pro-heterosexual (loud booing) but haven’t yet come out of the closet…so-to-speak. They should be mindful that God will get them for their intolerance. Just sayin’.”

Question: “Former Vice-President Biden, some have tried to smear you as the “moderate” candidate. How do you answer that charge…and what will you do to promote the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender lifestyle?”

Biden: “I resent the ‘moderate’ slander. I took part in the Stonewall Riots in Greenland Village in 1699 for God’s sake. I was injured when now-President Trump cold-cocked me—I didn’t mean it like that, but I wouldn’t care if I did—that’s how committed to the queer cause I’ve always been and always will be. I was a friend of the queers before queer was cool!”

                                                            [fade]

Sorority Sanctioned For Study Requirement

                The University of Virginia suspended a sorority last year because of its “hazing” abuses. That seems odd, as it’s usually fraternities and men’s athletics teams that have gotten into trouble for going too far in the long-time ritual of tormenting new members and freshman. So, what heinous hi-jinx did the (Latina) sorority dream up and perpetrate on its sisters? (Caution: squeamish readers might want to skip over the following sentence). It required them to study for a minimum of 25 hours a week.

                Yes, Sigma Lambda Upsilon was called on the proverbial carpet for “recklessly and intentionally endangering the health or safety” of its members. This raises the question: WTF?!? What’s next, will sororities start demanding that members attend their classes—or even receive passing grades? How will the sisters get enough sleep, let alone have enough free time to fight the social justice wars? Have they forgotten what college is all about?

                According to Charlottesville’s The Daily Progress newspaper, one of the sorority’s recruits complained to a professor about the requirement, and the professor subsequently informed the school’s student affairs office and the local police. (I was blissfully unaware that the men and women in blue were responsible for monitoring collegiate study guidelines). Incredibly, campus officials determined the sorority’s studying requirement violated the school’s hazing rules. The sorority is suing the school, thank the Lord. The suit notes that other classes and even athletic programs at the university expect at least 25 hours of study per week, and that the school never provided notice to any fraternal organization that there was a “general prohibition against studying 25 hours per week.” It adds that the sorority has been “discriminated against” because it was sanctioned “for no actual misconduct whatsoever.”

                The university recently tried to have the lawsuit dismissed by claiming “sovereign immunity.” In other words, “We are above the law. Whatever we say or do is inviolable.”

                The Latina sorority is to be commended. The University of Virginia’s actions are just another example of the collapse of higher education in the United States. Colleges no longer understand their mission and have abandoned standards in favor of virtue-signaling and group think. Treating the requirement for students to study hard on par with stripping them nude, shoving a corn cob up their butt and epoxying them to a garbage dumpster outside Che Guevara Hall on a frigid January evening is counterproductive and clinically insane.

George Mason University Hosts "Consent Carnival"

                The Student Support and Advocacy Center at George Mason University hosted a “Consent Carnival” recently in which students could choose from a range of educational activities, including lubricant taste tests, a vagina bean bag toss and a penis ring-toss game. Lubricant flavors included such classics as watermelon, cupcake and green apple. The bean bag toss consisted of giant inflatable lips that mimicked vaginas, into which students attempted to throw large pink bean bags. The site touted the fact that the vagina is self-cleaning. (“Is there a bun in your self-cleaning oven?”). Flyers at the site also informed students that “not all people with vaginas are women.” Much as not all large gray mammals with tusks and a long, prehensile trunk are elephants. Just as the fact that an animal has a backbone doesn’t mean it is a vertebrate. (People willing to be coerced into calling a woman a man, for example, are, in fact, spineless). The display also noted, “Genitalia is not an indicator of gender and it can be harmful to assume so.” This is like saying “hue is not an indicator of color” or “wetness is not an indicator of liquid.” Genitalia and gender both stem from the Latin word genus, meaning “kind, type or sort.”

                Perhaps insanity is not an indicator of mental illness.

                The penis ring-toss featured three-foot-high inflatable phalluses, surrounded by signs educating the young scholars in how to correctly don and use a condom. (And speaking of inflatables, a number of students were observed walking around holding giant, flesh-colored penis-shaped balloons). This must’ve been a depressing station for actual male members of the campus. So to speak. How do you measure up, lads? (But, remember, a penis is not an indicator of maleness)!

                Other stations at the educational extravaganza included an “affirmative consent kissing booth,” a “don’t touch my hair” booth, a condom balloon pop, a “you mustache for consent” table,” face painter, sno-cone machine, and “gender unicorn” booth. The gender unicorn booth sought to instruct students how to properly react to friends coming out as LGBTQ, while the “you mustache for consent” (get it?) table strove to teach students how to get consent before and during any sexual activity. (“May I place my hand on your shoulder? Thank you. Can I kiss your lips? I can? Then kindly just sign—and date-- this consent form, where indicated, in indelible blue or black ink. The top form is mine, the canary is for my lawyer, and the pink one is yours to keep for your records”).

                The College Fix reported that the face paint and sno-cone booths seemed to be the event’s most attended venues. I don’t know if that is a ray of hope or the saddest part of it all. Today’s students have been rendered mostly—unavoidably-- numb to everything pertaining to what should be the most private, intimate, and reverential act in which humans can participate.

                Sex carnivals are all the rage on college campuses these days. It is not publicly known who funded this one.

                George Mason was born very near where the university that bears his name stands today. He was a founder and patriot who helped draft the Bill of Rights.

                Perhaps he is even now looking down on the bastion of higher education that appropriated his name. 

                I’m sure he is very proud.