In an effort to attract African-American voters for a likely 2020 presidential run, Bernie Sanders recently made a 14-hour long swing through the South, even marching in Memphis with Al Sharpton on the 50th anniversary of the Rev. Martin Luther King JR.’s assassination. The Whitest One also spoke before a crowd at an economic justice forum in Jackson, Mississippi, under the projected words of Dr. King stating: “True compassion is more than flipping a coin to a beggar; it comes to see that an edifice which produces beggars needs restructuring.” He finished the day’s attempt to burnish his non-stellar reputation among African-Americans by devouring a plate of wings during a late-night dinner with Chokwe Antar Lumumba, the city’s new mayor.
After observing a comically bad online headline about his efforts that read, “Bernie Wooing Blacks,” I decided to pen a song in his honor. Well, actually, I rewrote a song in his honor.
Bernie and the Blacks
Hey blacks, how ya’ like my sweater?
The spotlight’s hitting something
That’s been around forever
We’ll kill all those fat cats tonight
So stick around
You’re gonna hear some old-time music
Folk songs will abound
Hey, Maxine and Sharpton, have you seen them yet?
But they’re so spaced out, B_B_B_Bernie and the blacks!
Oh, but their weird and they’re wonderful
And on Bernie oh so keen
Al’s got eclectic shoes, a baggy suit
You know I saw him in a limousine, oh
B_B_B_Bernie and the blacks!
Hey kids, can’t you see I’m ageless?
Maybe they’re blinded
Or maybe they’re just shameless
We shall overcome, let us take ourselves along
And go fight the system out in the streets
Tell them all this is our song:
“Hey Bernie (Bernie)
Oh Bernie (Bernie, Bernie and the blacks)
Oh, you look so good on that stage, baby, yeah
Ey, Bernie, oh Bernie, yeah Bernie, Bernie
Bernie and the blacks baby!
Oh my Godlessness, ooh, yeah
Bernie, Bernie, Bernie, Bernie, Bernie and the blacks!! Yeah!!”
(Sing to the beat/rhythm of Elton John’s Benny and the Jets)