I used to have 20/20 vision, but alas that is no longer the
case. However, that will not keep me from looking ahead to the year 2020 and speculating as to who may
be the Democratic Party’s standard-bearer in that year’s presidential election.
After all, it’s President’s Day, and therefore only fitting that we should
embark on this mental journey. Join me, won’t you?
There
has been much talk of Keith Ellison, Rep.-MN, becoming the chairman of the
Democratic National Committee (DNC). Ellison, the first openly Muslim
representative in Congress, has ties to Louis Farrakhan and the radical Nation
of Islam going back to his college days, and seems like a good fit to continue
to shepherd the party in the direction it is already rapidly travelling. There
has also been talk of the Democrats nominating Elizabeth Warren, the party’s
senior Senator from Massachusetts, for president in 2020. Candidate Trump
tabbed Warren “Pocahontas” during the 2016 campaign in light of her ludicrous
claim that she’s Native American. If she does
get the nod, perhaps a better nickname for her would be Sacagawea. After all,
it was Sacagawea who led Lewis and Clark to the West (Left) Coast, now a
Democratic stronghold. Perhaps, duly inspired, she could lead the Progressive
Party back to the White House.
As for
other possible candidates, Hillary Clinton is too unpopular, scandal-ridden and
frail to make another run at the throne. Bernie Sanders will probably be too
old at the time, and besides, his brand of socialism will likely be seen as
blasé and passé by then. Most top Democrats believe the party needs to move
even faster and further to the left than it has recently to retake power. As
odd and counterintuitive as that notion may seem now, given the apparently
inexorable demographic and cultural changes, they may actually be right. In
that spirit, here are my suggestions
for Democratic nominees in 2020:
* RuPaul
Andre Charles is famous simply as RuPaul. He is a drag queen, model, actor,
author, television personality and recording artist. Immersed in the arts and
on good terms with the mainstream media, he is a natural fit. What’s more, his one word moniker is catchy
and easy to remember, like Pelé, or Madonna.
*Chad
Sevearance is president of the Charlotte Business Guild, a network of LGBT
professionals in the Charlotte area who meet to promote positive role models in
the LGBT community. He and his group took a lead role in seeking the right to
allow transgender people to use the bathrooms of the sex with which they claim
to identify. Sevearance worked as a youth minister in 1998, and, during that
time, allegedly lured younger males to his apartment where he attempted to have
sex with them. In 2000, he was convicted of one charge of sexual molestation of
a minor. He would be in the vanguard of the new progressive movement.
*Beyoncé.
She is an immensely popular modern music icon who has recently performed songs
decrying racism and police brutality. The fabulously wealthy diva also sings
songs with lyrics such as:
Keep
me coming, keep me going, keep me coming, keep me going
Keep
me humming, keep me moaning, keep me humming, keep me moaning
Don’t
stop loving ‘til the morning, don’t stop loving ‘til the morning
Don’t
stop screaming, freaking, blowing
It’s
the sweetest in the middle
Pink
is the flavor
Solve
the riddle
Riddle
solved, my girl. Call me Sherlock. You’d be a natural (Au Naturel?) in a
progression from JFK, Ted Kennedy, Gary Hart, Bill Clinton, Monica Lewinsky,
Anthony Weiner, et. al.!
*Charles
Manson. The famous mass-murderer is also the issuer of a famous quote, one
which clearly speaks to our present situation: “You know, a long time ago being
crazy meant something. Nowadays everybody’s crazy.” Who knew he was such
an astute social observer? Manson, a long-time member of the Church of Satan,
leads me to my next potential Democratic nominee. Drawback: Probably couldn’t
get him out of prison.
*Peter
Howard Gilmore. Pete is a composer, artiste,
author, and the administrator of the Church of Satan. (What the hell does he do
in his spare time?). He graduated from NYU (there’s a shock) and went on to
author The Satanic Scriptures. He
perfectly personifies the new Dems, who famously booed the mere mention of God
at their 2012 convention.
*Cecile
Richards. Ms. Richards has been the acting head of the Planned Parenthood Federation
of America since 2006 and is the president of the Planned Parenthood Action
Fund. As a fervent believer in granting careless and promiscuous mothers the
right to deny innocent babies their right to survive, she would be a natural born leader of today’s Democratic Party.
Think
of the potential pairings! We could have Ms. Richards with Beyoncé on the first
ever all-women ticket. Beyoncé with RuPaul would constitute the first pair of
running-mates to each only sport one
name! This, again, has the added benefit
of making the duo much easier for leftists to recall when standing before the
ballot box. And, talk about a versatile line-up? RuPaul could be either First Lady or First Gentleman.
Speaking
of journeys, it’s one hell of a long way from George Washington to where we are
now.
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