Friday, October 16, 2015

Western University Bans 'Violent' Words And Phrases

Western University in London, England, is attempting to ban the use of “violent” words and phrases, and/or at least shame those vulgar enough to use them. Helpfully, the school has been very specific in communicating just which words and phrases are offensive and potentially damaging.
Among the most unspeakably heinous utterances (and the University’s first-person reasoning for deeming them so):
*skinny: “I don’t say ‘skinny,’ as it is not validating.”
*get over it: “I don’t tell people to ‘get over it’ because it ignores the long-lasting impacts of certain life experiences.” (In fact, in anticipating such violent terminology, the University would put a ‘trigger warning’ prior to the offending statement to warn folks that there is ‘danger ahead.’).
*blind: “I don’t say I was ‘blind to something,’ as it ignores the experiences of differently abled individuals.”
*whitewashed: “I don’t say ‘whitewashed’ because it is used to insult those who do not conform to negative stereotypes of a community or culture.” (What the hell?).
*”We don’t say ‘freak’ because it reduces certain identities and encourages the perpetuation of violence.”
*”I don’t call people ‘gingers’ because a unique hair colour does not make one inferior.” (‘Ginger’ is a hair colour? A unique one? Like Ginger’s on Gilligan’s Island? That makes her and her color-mates inferior??!).
*”We don’t say ‘spirit animal’ because it is a form of cultural appropriation.” (I don’t even know what that means, but it is obviously not bad on its face, and if we ‘appropriated’ it from another culture, well, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery).
*”I don’t ask ‘who wears the pants in your relationship?’ because it expects homosexual couples to subscribe to heterosexual norms.” (“Subscribe?” Really? True, in many homosexual pairings neither partner wears pants. Perhaps it would be more appropriate to ask them, ‘who’s the pitcher and who’s the catcher you guys?’ or ‘who wears the strap-on in your relationship?’).

Western University, here’s the skinny: radical freaks have whitewashed your institution and made you blind to the fact that Ginger would wear the pants in your spirit animal family.

Get over it!

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