Friday, December 30, 2022

Putin Critic Falls Out Window, Dies


Sausage multi-millionaire Pavel Antov, Russia’s “highest-earning elected politician,” was recently in India celebrating his 66th birthday when he reportedly fell to his death from a hotel window. (I hate that when that happens.)

In totally unrelated news, Antov had recently criticized Putin’s actions in Ukraine, characterizing air strikes on Kyiv as “terror.” Oddly, Antov perished shortly thereafter and just two days after a close friend of his unexpectedly died “from a heart attack.”

Antov had highlighted a Russian missile strike, saying: “A girl has been pulled out from under the rubble, the girl's father appears to have died. The mother is trying to be pulled out with a crane - she is trapped under a slab. To tell the truth, it is extremely difficult to call this anything other than terror.”

This led Antov to come under intense pressure…after which he withdrew the comment and issued a sniveling apology, claiming his social media post had been “an unfortunate misunderstanding” and a “technical error.”

Alexei Idamkin, the Russian Consul General in Kolkata, told TASS that Antov “fell” out of a hotel window in Rayagada, Odisha state.

This means Antov joins the expansive ranks of Russian doctors who, in recent years, have also inexplicably met their tragic demise falling out of hospital windows.

Perhaps the Biden administration should start using the same tactic to deal with its perceived enemies? It’s obvious that the Clintons would embrace such measures. And the American mainstream media would love to report that Donald Trump, Ted Cruz, Lauren Boebert, et. al., “fell out a window” to their deaths.

However, if there were many rational people left on this orb, such preposterous “explanations” for the deaths of our rulers’ political opponents would not go unchallenged.

Vlad should’ve claimed that Antov died as a result of something less preposterous than falling out of a hotel window in the winter. Maybe he should have said Antov was hit by a meteor. Or, better yet, a stray Ukrainian missile. Or that he died of climate change.

But, unfortunately, in today’s world, sanity is out the window.

Just like Antov.





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