U.S. Navy To Name Ships After Harvey Milk, Civil Rights Advocates

                According to a July 14 Congressional notification obtained by U.S.N.I. News, the Navy is set to name a ship after gay rights icon Harvey Milk. The notification, signed by Secretary of the Navy Ray Mabus, indicated he will name a planned Military Sea-lift Command fleet oiler U.S.N.S. Harvey Milk (T-AO-206). His office is deferring the release of additional information until the actual naming announcement, a Navy official told U.S.N.I. News.

                The ship will be the second vessel in the new John Lewis-class of oilers and is to be built by General Dynamics out of San Diego. Mabus said that the “John Lewis-class” designation is a tribute to civil rights activist and Congressman John Lewis (D-GA), and that other- and future- ships in this class are/will themselves be named after civil rights activists. Apparently, the class currently includes the U.S.N.S. Lucy Stone (an unfortunate name for a surface ship), named for the women’s rights activist, and the U.S.N.S. Sojourner Truth (I love that name!), in honor of the abolitionist with the incredibly cool moniker.

                If Trump wins, and we actually start expanding instead of contracting our navy, I’d like to see some additional class designations added to the fleet- in the interest of modernity and progressivism. As long as we are now naming ships for socio-political reasons that have nothing to do with American military history (Harvey milk was in the navy, it must be mentioned, from 1951 until 1955), we need to celebrate and honor more recent, cutting edge civil rights freedom fighters.

                I can envision a (Caitlyn) Jenner-class of fast attack boats- that can quickly be converted into troop transport ships- that will be named after famous transgender rights advocates. These should not be confused with the new (Malcolm) Brenner-class submarines, named after the famous bestiality advocate who had sex with a bottle-nose dolphin and wrote about it in his 2009 autobiographical novel, Wet Goddess.

                There will no doubt soon be a U.S.N.S. Richard Dawkins in honor of the famous atheist evangelizer- if there isn’t already- followed shortly by the U.S.N.S. Anton Lavey honoring the august founder of the Church of Satanism.

                “Caligula-class” has a nice ring to it. Perhaps the navy will develop an entirely new class of ships for the 21^st century in honor of the old incest-monger himself. This makes sense, in a back-to-the-future sort of way, what with the parallels between the fall of the Roman Empire and the current state of the Obamanation. The vessels could sport names like the U.S.N.S. Polyamory and such like. Talk about pleasure boating! That’s one way to grow the fleet.

                True, these new names aren’t exactly the “Saratoga” or the “Yorktown,” but they are in keeping with the new revolution sweeping America and her armed forces.

                 Remember our new slogan: “The U.S. Navy- Let’s All Come Together!”