It's never too early to start thinking about your taxes, fellow citizens. Long before you reach
for your W-4 form, or make that check out to Uncle Sam, take a look at some of
the fantastic things the tax dollars taken from you (under penalty of law) have
paid for recently!
In
2017, we spent:
*$30,000
on “Doggie Hamlet” via the National Endowment for the Arts. [“To pee, or not to
pee (on master’s Persian rug), that
is the question.”]
*$700,000
for a community center with high-speed internet for LaGrange, Arkansas, a town
of 78 inhabitants. (Only $8,974 per person! Let’s do this for every small town
in every state!)
*$1.5
million for a study to answer the age-old question of how to make tomatoes
taste better. (This is why government is so inefficient. I’d say make them taste like bacon, and only charge Uncle Sam $50.
Savings to the American taxpayer: $1,499,950)
*$2
million for EPA security needs due to threats from climate change activists.
(Want to lessen pollution? Get rid of the climate change activists)
*$15
million to train Kenyan farmers on
how to use Facebook. (Coincidentally,
the same amount of money Facebook spent on how to use Kenyan farmers)
*$15
million training Walmart cashiers in Mexico. (Too easy. Insert your own joke
here).
*$255
million repairing roads…in
Afghanistan. (WTF? There aren’t $255 million worth of roads in Afghanistan)
You're feeling better already, aren't you?
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