Thursday, September 21, 2017

"Rocket Man"

            President Trump recently started referring to the crazy, corpulent North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un as “Rocket Man.” That, of course, made me re-imagine a popular song so titled. So, here goes:

She packed my weed last night, pre-fight
Hero hour nine a.m.
And I’m gonna be high, as a kite by then
I grow my girth so much, it bums my wife
It’s lonely in my place
With such an endless plight

And I think it’s gonna be a long, long time
With people starving and losing their minds
I’m not the man they think I am at home
Oh, no, no, no, I’m the “Rocket Man”
“Rocket Man,” dishing out abuse like Sly Stallone

And I think it’s gonna be a long, long time
With people starving and losing their minds
I’m not the man they think I am at home
Oh, no, no, no, I’m the “Rocket Man”
“Rocket Man,” dishing out abuse like Sly Stallone

Ours ain’t the kind of place to raise your kids
In fact, it’s cold as Hell
And there’s no food here to feed them, if you did
And all this science, I don’t understand
It’s just my job, seven days a week
A “Rocket Man,” a “Rocket Man”

And I sure hope that it won’t take too much time
Till more launches bring Trump ‘round again to find
I’m not the man he thinks he can cow-tow
Oh, no, no, no, I’m the “Rocket Man”
“Rocket Man,” Ri Sol-ju’s gonna leave me alone

And I sure hope that it won’t take too much time
Till missile launches bring Trump ‘round again to find
I’m not the man he thinks he can cow-tow
Oh, no, no, no, I’m the “Rocket Man”
“Rocket Man,” Kim Ju-ae wants to see me overthrown

And I think I really need a bong this time
And I’m glad I didn’t wear a thong this time
And I think that I may have bet wrong this time
And I think the U.S. may be strong this time
And I think we may be getting ‘gonged’ this time
Holy shit, perhaps this was the wrong, wrong time?

Etc., etc., etc., etc….

Spoof loosely based on the song, “Rocket Man”: Songwriters: JOHN, ELTON / TAUPIN, BERNARD J.P.
 © Universal Music Publishing Group


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