Wednesday, November 2, 2016

Forced Childbirth Biggest Cause Of Global Warming?

                 “Forced childbirth is the single biggest cause of global warming.”

                That reasoned exclamation came from renowned climatological expert Gloria Steinem. In her keynote address at a Planned Parenthood fundraiser in Memphis, Tennessee, the aging feminist opined on a wide range of topics, such as feminism, anti-racism, global warming and abortion, in an attempt to illustrate their inter-relatedness. “Why is it that the same people who are against birth control and abortion are also against sex between two women or two men?” Steinem asked her audience. She went on to surmise that those people “are against any sex that cannot end in reproduction.”
                Pretty good guess, Gloria! You may have accidentally just answered your own tortured question. This just in: Given the obvious specificity and sublime character of their design, it is likely male and female genitalia were intended to promote the union of a man and a woman in order to perpetuate the species. Hard to believe, I know! (Tolerant progressives, feel free to unleash your ubiquitous torrent of hate-filled invective on me now)!
                I mean, a guy could attempt to use his penis to hammer in nails or have sex with a hamster, but- and call me old-fashioned, call me a skeptic- I truly don’t believe those are just as logical, productive, natural and noble pursuits as joining with a woman to create a child. Similarly, a woman could choose to make it with a St. Bernard or use her vagina to store coins in, but- crazy prude that I am- in my mind this doesn’t rise to the level of necessity and spirituality as does a mature male-female relationship.

                But I digress.

                “Forced childbirth?” Apparently Gloria interprets even the slightest restrictions on unfettered abortion as forced childbirth. And to then declare the birth of children the biggest cause of global warming is tragically, sickeningly illustrative of the progressive mindset. “Kill the children, save our Mother Earth!”
                “Forced childbirth?” That boggles the mind. Are jack-booted NAZI Republicans roaming around the country forcing folks to have procreative sex, Gloria? I thought that they, too, were such starchy old prudes.

                Perhaps the holocaust was really an attempt to forestall global warming? Maybe Hitler was just the pre-eminent environmentalist of his day! Maybe those opposed to the concentration camps were really in favor of saving and expanding the Jewish population in order to exacerbate global warming!
                Gloria, your remarks- and those of your leftist brethren- are the single biggest cause of global dumbing.

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