Sunday, May 17, 2026

How Many Democrats Does It Take...

How many Democrats does it take to screw in a lightbulb? (Trick question. Many Democrats don’t know how to screw in a lightbulb and most have their servants do it. It should be noted, however, that hundreds of them in Washington, D.C. will debate what kind of bulbs should be legal, their maximum wattage, etc., etc.)

Why don’t Democrats use ice cubes? (The lost the recipe.)

Why can’t progressives write the number ’11?’ (They can’t figure out which number comes first. Progs like Ilhan Omar, can say “eleven,” however, as she recently and hilariously proved.)

Why do some Democrats put Cheerios in the ground? (They think they are donut seeds.)

How do you make leftists go to their roof? (Tell them drinks are on the house.)

How did the Democrat break his leg while raking leaves? (He fell out of the tree.)

What do you call a basement full of Karens? (A whine cellar.)

Why did the Democrat keep empty beer bottles in her refrigerator? (So she’d have something to give her friends that don’t drink.)

Two progressives were sitting on a bench when one asked the other, “Which do you think is farther away, Montana or the moon?” The other replied, “Well, you can’t see Montana…”

Why don’t Democrats like AM radios? (They think they only work during the day.)

Why did The Squad member stare at the orange juice can? (Because it said “concentrate.”)

Did you hear about the Italian Democrat? (He made himself an offer he couldn’t understand.)

What do you call a moderate Democrat? (An endangered species.)

What do you call a sane Democrat? (John Fetterman.)

Why did the Democrat cross the road? (To get to the Planned Parenthood clinic. Duh.)

Why do Democrats hate the truth? (Because it can set you free.)

How many Democrats does it take to destroy America? (218 in the House and 51 in the Senate. And that is a very bad joke, indeed.)

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