Monday, April 17, 2023

"Explosion Kills 18,000 Cows" Reports Say, And No Questions Asked

 

Recently, news broke regarding an explosion at a dairy farm in the Texas Panhandle, in which approximately 18,000 cows were killed (and one person critically injured). The Castro County Sheriff’s Office confirmed the explosion to Fox News Digital and stated that the cows were in a holding area before being brought in for milking when the blast occurred at the Southfork Dairy Farm in Dimmitt. The Texas State Fire Marshal’s Office is investigating the cause of the fire.

 

Castro County Sheriff Sal Rivera spoke to local media outlet KSAT-TV about the explosion and subsequent fire, saying that speculation centered around “what they call a honey badger, which is a vacuum that sucks the manure and water out and possibly that it got overheated and probably the methane and things like that ignited and spread out and exploded and the fire.”

 

Um, sure. Not.

 

I mean, what the hell?! What kind of explosion could possibly cause the death of 18,000 cattle?! This is a bovine Hiroshima or Nagasaki! I’m not buying the theory that a vacuum exploded, killing 18,000 dairy cows, whose average weight is over 1,500 pounds. Over how vast an area were the cows dispersed, even if in a pen? At 8 feet long and like 5 feet wide, even if they were all standing nearly nose-to-tail and shoulder-to-shoulder they would cover an area of roughly 26 football fields. And this was on essentially open prairie, with not much fuel for a fire.

 

Did North Korea hit the farm with a nuke? Were the cattle done in by an asteroid or large meteorite? And why the hell is every food processing plant, dairy farm and chicken coop in America blowing up, burning up, or otherwise being destroyed? Is it for the same reason our leaders are abandoning the use of fossil fuels? Do they want us to be immobile and reliant on a bug-heavy diet A.S.A.P.?

 

And why is the media udderly utterly sanguine and uninterested in any of this? Shouldn’t inquiring minds want to know?

 

 

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