I feel “The Onion’s” pain.
From time to time, usually after I post a parody piece, I will get someone
saying something like, “I thought it was funny, but, come on, that’s never
gonna happen.” And then, often within days…it, or something very much like it,
happens. There are numerous examples. Recently, I posted, “Washington, D.C. to
be Renamed,” and, while I admit that may still be highly unlikely, the
following (and more) has already come to pass: the state Democratic
Party of Connecticut, under pressure by the NAACP, unanimously voted to
rename their annual fundraising dinner. For years it had been called the “Jefferson,
Jackson, Bailey Dinner.” They are booting Thomas Jefferson and Andrew Jackson
off of the title. (Also see my post from two days ago, “U.S. Declaring
Independence From Thomas Jefferson”). Apparently, Bailey, a Connecticut state
and DNC chairman under JFK and LBJ, is still on the billing. It helps
when you live in an era devoid of slavery.
Andrew Jackson has had a tough year for a dead guy. He’s been threatened with
eviction from the front of the $20 bill, as well.
But Thomas Jefferson?! Really? The 13th Amendment to the
United States Constitution- you know, the one abolishing slavery- used
language drafted by Jefferson to that end. And he did write the
Declaration of Independence. He also founded- and funded- the University of
Virginia. He was a farmer, lawyer, inventor, architect, Governor of Virginia,
Minister to France and Secretary of State. He was president for 8 years and
authorized the Louisiana Purchase. I mean, come on!
Moreover, Jefferson has for decades been lauded as the founder of the
Democratic Party. (This may have made some sense, even through the 19th
century, until the modern-day party took a sharp turn and exited reality, stage
left. Shredding Jefferson’s agrarian roots, the Democrats are now the Party of
the Inner City Elites and Their Wards and openly mock those in “fly-over”
country).
You know others will follow suit. Jefferson’s name will eventually be taken off
of schools, roads and cities, etc., and several other founders will get the
same treatment. Or maybe all of them will.
In any case, the dinner will be rechristened. A new name for the event is to be
chosen this fall.
Let’s turn it into a contest! Submit your suggestions now!
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