Saturday, March 7, 2020

Bloomberg Says He Would've Beaten Trump

                Failed Democratic presidential candidate Mike Bloomberg threw in the towel recently and quit the race, after being thoroughly embarrassed on Super Tuesday. However, this did not keep the diminutive billionaire from boldly claiming to supporters in his farewell speech, “This really is the best, most creative, most hardworking campaign team ever assembled. And I have to say, there is no doubt in my mind we would’ve beaten Donald Trump in November.” For good measure Bloomberg added, “And you know who else knows that? Donald Trump. He’s been scared stiff of us and for good reason.” Yes, it stands to reason that the candidate that got whupped by Pocahontas, the mayor of South Bend, Indiana, an aging Communist-- and a serial groper that often does not know what state he is in—would have no trouble defeating the incumbent President of the United States during an economic boom. I mean, the man spent over $500 million on his campaign, only to win one primary or caucus, American Samoa’s. Given that there were only 200,110 citizens residing in that territory at the latest official count, Mini-Mike spent $2,498.63 per man, woman and child to take that electoral prize. Probably closer to $10,000 per vote.
                Oddly enough, the serial groper that often does not know what state he is in, Joe Biden, also believes Trump is terrified of him. In a recent interview, Quid Pro Joe told NBC: “I think the one thing the president doesn’t want to do from the very beginning is face me, because I will beat him. Period. Period. He has done everything in his power—he’s even risked his presidency because he doesn’t want to face me.” He then posed what he termed a rhetorical question: “Have you ever ever seen a sitting president get so involved in a Democratic primary and focus so much attention on not wanting a single person, me, to be the nominee?" Someone’s a little full of himself, despite the fact that a week ago many thought he was dead in the water, a victim of his own prodigious gaffes. I highly doubt Trump is shaking in his boots—or whatever footwear happens to be adorning his feet at the moment—at the thought of debating Uncle Joe.
                We already knew that Democrats live in a fantasy world. Apparently, they have delusions of adequacy, too.

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