Wednesday, December 12, 2018

Migrants Demand Asylum...Or Cash

                Two caravans of Central American migrants made separate marches on the United States Consulate in Tijuana, Mexico recently, demanding that President Trump promptly let them into the U.S… or pay them each $50,000 to go back home. Alfonso Guerrero Ulloa, one of the group’s organizers, was asked how the $50,000 figure was chosen. He responded that they decided on that figure as a group, adding, “It may seem like a lot of money to you, but it is a small sum compared to everything the United States has stolen from Honduras.” Say what?!
                The group wrote a letter addressed to President Trump, Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen, San Ysidro Port Director Sidney Aki, and Commissioner of the Office of Customs and Border protection Kevin McAleenan, criticizing American intervention in Central America and giving the U.S. 72 hours to respond. Yet, incredibly, the letter also asked the United States to remove Honduran President Orlando Hernandez from office.
                “Dear United States: let us in immediately-- or give us $50,000 each and we’ll call it good and go home. Also, stop meddling in our affairs! Oh, but please take out our president ASAP! Sincerely, Migrant Caravan Members.”
                The U.S., rather than “stealing from” Honduras, gives the nation millions of dollars a year in aid, $181 million in 2017 alone to be precise. (President Trump has threatened to cut off this aid if Honduras, and other Central American countries, don’t stop the migrant groups before they reach the U.S. border). Ulloa says the 50 grand or so per person would allow each of the migrants to return home and start a small business.
                Perhaps a nascent narcotics ring or a quaint little flower shop, massage parlor or pizza emporium.
                These may be third world folks, but this is a first-rate scam! I want to go country to country demanding each in turn grant me citizenship or fork over the equivalent of $50,000 U.S.! Imagine if this same demand was repeated at a consulate of every Western nation. I’d be a true “citizen of the world” and/or fabulously wealthy.
                I think I might also try this at the local level and engage in a little microeconomics, as it were. I’m going to go house to house in the neighborhood, knock on each door and demand that each household let me stay with them… or give me $1,000.
Then I’ll tell them to stop playing their music so loud and beg them to depose my wife.

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