Wednesday, August 23, 2017

Newsweek Blasts Trump Women's Footwear Choices

                A recently published Newsweek piece attacked First Lady Melania Trump and first daughter Ivanka Trump for the crime of wearing high heels. The weighty- and timely- piece was titled “Melania, Ivanka, and Ivana Trump Wear High Heels, a Symbol of Everything That Is Beautiful and Horrifying About Them.” The author, Nina Burleigh, made the explosive claim that high heels are out of fashion, yet the Trump women still wear them to appear attractive to men, instead of wearing more comfortable footwear!
                Egads! Assemble another special counsel to investigate! They might be colluding with shoe companies, perhaps even Russian ones! And why would they want to appear attractive to men?! Their egregious behavior might rise to the level of high (heel) crimes and misdemeanors! Put our best gumshoes on the case immediately! We’ve got to get to the bottom of Heelgate!
                Ms. Burleigh lectures us thusly: “Historically, the Trumpian women’s shoe of choice was invented not for women but for aristocratic men, men who would never have to work, and who didn’t have to walk much but were carried in litters or carriages.” Nina, are you saying women “appropriated” men’s shoes?! Or are you insinuating that Melania and Ivanka don’t work and would like to be carried around- in “Trumpian” fashion- on litters or carriages?
                In a similar vein, a recent Forbes article stated that, while Melania is fashionable enough, she’s unlikely to achieve the fashion-icon status of…Michelle Obama. Author Rachelle Bergstein opined that Melania just sticks to a traditional or “classic style,” whereas Michelle “captured the zeitgeist in fashion.” This raises the age-old question, “WTF?!”
                Attacking First Ladies and presidential offspring used to be beyond the pale, as they aren’t elected, nor do they set public policy. Trump Derangement Syndrome has changed all that.  Let’s be honest, no matter what Michelle Obama wore, as long as it wasn’t a “Make America Great Again” hat, the mainstream media would sing the praises of her astounding fashion “zeitgeist.” Even sadder and more pathetic, if Michelle and Melania had simply switched outfits/styles, the media’s comments would’ve remained unchanged.
                Ms. Burleigh, Ms. Bergstein, I think we all know who the heels are in this case, don’t we?

                If the shoe fits…


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