Wednesday, August 2, 2017

Crayola Shocks Crayon World With Introduction Of Progressive New Color!

Tuesday, August 8, 2017
News Services-

            Crayola has broken the coloring barrier.
The iconic Easton, Pennsylvania based manufacturer of kid’s creative art supplies has added a new and truly transformative hue: "transcolor." Sources say the company wanted to burnish its image as a progressive, inclusive, forward-looking business. One of these highly-placed sources told me, on condition of anonymity, that “the company was proud that it has previously attempted to gather all the colors of the rainbow, if you know what I mean, into one box. But this is a brave new world.” The source said of the new tone, “It can be any color, all colors, or no color at all, at any given time. Or any mix thereof.”
Analysts were taken by surprise at the company’s announcement, and experts have generally been effusive in their praise of the development. “I thought they hung the moon when they came out with Outrageous Orange, Beaver, Blush, Mauvelous, Jazzberry Jam and Tickle Me Pink,” said one, “but this tops them all!”
Another stated: “They are to paraffin wax what Michelangelo was to marble. And this will take the Crayola Experience at the Mall of America to a whole new level!”

One analyst offered words of caution, however, stating, “If you really think about it, this new ‘Transcolored’ tone sort of renders all of the other colors moot. When they realize this, I’d look for Crayola to go to a one crayon business model moving forward, if only for the cost savings.”

            A spokesperson for Crayola says the company originally started studying the concept "a year or so ago," due to the rapid acceptance of transgenderism. The new "trans crayon" is currently in production and is expected to be available to consumers by October 1st.

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