Thursday, July 25, 2019

Berkeley Bans Men

                The city of Berkeley, California, recently adopted an ordinance mandating the removal of words that imply a gender preference from the city’s codes. The non-inclusive, verboten verbiage will be expunged from Berkeley’s municipal codes as quickly and effortlessly as a baby fetus non-viable tissue mass is torn apart and swept from its mother’s womb. Ergo, words such as “manhole” and “manpower” will be sh*t-canned in favor of the much more palatable terms “maintenance hole” and “human effort.” Roll right off the tongue, don’t they? I think we should purify the works of Shakespeare in much the same manner.
                The term “policemen” is out, of course, and even “policewomen” doesn’t make the cut…because it contains the toxically masculine word “men.” The revised city documents will also replace tired old gendered pronouns like “he” and “she” with the more up-to-date and accurate “they.”
                Berkeley City Council member Rigel Robinson was the bill’s primary author. He noted that his bill passed without discussion or comments and was not controversial, according to That’s good. Discussion is highly overrated. Group think is not, apparently.
                Robinson added, “There’s power in language. This is a small move, but it matters.” (There is less power in language than there used to be, thanks to actions like Berkeley’s). He also stated: “Having a male-centric municipal code is inaccurate and not reflective of our reality. Women and non-binary individuals are just as entitled to accurate representation. Our laws are for everyone, and our municipal code should reflect that.”
                Berkeley has historically been a hotbed of progressive thought—and action. We can count on the town to lead the rest of America the United States out of the Dark Ages and into the light of wokeness.
                Take a moment to reflect, if you dare, on the following patently offensive, patriarchy-promoting words and phrases: “Mansion:” Like anything big and expensive has to be male. As if. “Manage:” Females and non-binary individuals can make it on their own, thank you very much, Pirates of the Patriarchy. “Manicure:” This is doubly bad. Men are the problem, not the cure. “Man-child:” Also doubly bad. We should say instead, “person-after-birth abortion candidate.” “Menopause:” Do I even have to address this one? Men should pause, but they don’t. Females have no choice. Only women bleed. Until they don’t.
                In progressive’s perfect world, Menards, the giant home-improvement chain, would be forced to rebrand as “Theyards.” Mankato, Minnesota and Menomonie, Wisconsin, would be renamed Personkato and Neutrally-Genderedomonie respectively.

                The city of Berkeley’s actions are nothing if not manic insane.

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