Wesley Scott, a Florida man, was recently arrested on an
outstanding warrant charging him with drug possession. He was originally subjected
to a 4:30 am search in the field where he denied having any illegal items
concealed on his person. However, when he was made the object of a strip search
upon arrival at the Pinellas County jail, he proceeded to remove “three
syringes from his rectum” and provided them to a jailer. (Who, I fervently
hope, was wearing impermeable gloves).
He
claimed that he “found” the syringes. He said they “were not his.”
I don’t
know about you, but whenever I come across something curious or potentially
illegal, I cram it up my ass as a matter of course. Especially if it is rigid,
pointy, and likely to cause great pain. However, overly skeptical officials
apparently didn’t believe Scott’s highly plausible story, and therefore charged
him with introducing contraband into a correctional facility, which is a
felony.
It is quite a coincidence that an innocent
man accused of illegal drug possession should happen to have multiple syringes
up his butt when brought into custody.
But, who are we to judge? Maybe he
was just a good Samaritan going around picking up litter…or offering flu shots
to the disadvantaged.
No comments:
Post a Comment