Well, so much for the vaunted ethos of “scientific
detachment and objectivity.” The headline (in many, many major newspapers,
on-line, etc.) of an article about a newly discovered animal species recently
read, “Adorable New Mammal Species Found ‘In Plain Sight’.” The article stated
that the discovery of a new species
was a rarity ( as opposed to how many are disappearing do to man’s evil ways).
It went on to state that this new species eats fruit and weighs about two
pounds, lives in Ecuador and Columbia and swings through trees at night. Oh,
and it has a “teddy bear” face.
When a
legitimately significant scientific finding such as this is announced, the
first word in the headline of an article reporting the finding shouldn’t be “Adorable.” The dictionary meaning of
the word adorable is: “very attractive or delightful; charming; worthy of being
adored.” So let’s go now to the Webster’s New Universal Unabridged Dictionary
definition of adore: to regard with the utmost esteem, love and respect; honor;
to pay divine honor to; worship. No subjectivity
here! No feelings or bias!
Are we
logically to consider this animal “charming” when we’ve just discovered
him/her? Does it speak French, say we’re beautiful and buy us a drink? And
worship? Many of the intelligentsia, the enlightened, don’t worship God
anymore, but the newly presented- and “adorable”- Olinguito is worthy of our
divine approbation?
I don’t
recall scientific findings being presented like this in the past. I thought
they were to be conveyed in a sober, clinical, factual manner.
Upon
inventing the telephone, Alexander Graham Bell did not say (during the first ever “call”) to his assistant “Mr.
Watson…come here…I want you and your cute little chubby cheeks to see my
amazing invention. It’s way cool!”
Perhaps
I missed the headline stating “Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation Gives
Scientists Confirmation of One Hell of a Sexy Big Bang… Creating Universe.”
I don’t
think “discovery” of the buffalo in 1804 prompted headlines such as “Adorable , Fuzzy, New Wild Oxen Species Discovered on Plains…’in Plain
Sight’.”
Oh,
well. At least I can finish this post
with a peerlessly reasoned, clinical statement of fact born of the strictest
scientific methodology and purest motives: “Unprecedented Man-Caused Climate
Change To Kill Us All!”
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