Thursday, March 14, 2024

PETA Pressures White House To Replace Eggs With Potatoes This Easter


Reports indicate that People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) is pressuring First Lady Jill Biden to forego eggs this Easter and instead use “dyed Easter potatoes” for the White House’s annual Easter Egg Roll event. That idea is half-baked, at best. A spud is scarcely a substitute for an egg.

Easter eggs have historically been seen as a symbol of fertility and the rebirth of nature after the long winter. Potatoes are a symbol of…Russia. Or modern fast-food culture. Not the same. Who’s ever heard of an Easter potato coloring kit? The outside of a potato is porous, uneven, and possesses eyes. And is typically much darker than the white shell of an egg.

Potatoes don’t work nearly as well as eggs for constructing idioms, either. Nobody ever said, “don’t put all your potatoes in one basket,” for example.

If Jill Biden and the White House give in to PETA’s demand, I hope they end up with potato on their faces. (See?)

Potatoes and eggs can be good together, however. On our breakfast plates. An omelette and a side of hash browns. Yum!

Now, about the Easter bunny

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