Gorilla Warfare

                A statue of a gorilla at the Community Park Playground in Corsicana, Texas was removed by the city recently because some residents found it racially insensitive, according to a city spokesperson. Mayor Don Denbow stated, “We can understand this, because we have an obligation to listen to all our citizens, to determine what is offensive and not, especially in public places,” cbslocal.com reported.

                I can’t understand this, or the non-sequitur. How racist do those offended by the statue have to be? The implication that others looking at a statue of an ape would automatically think of a dark-skinned person is insane. (I’m guessing that is why they found it offensive. I can’t think of another reason for their deeming it objectionable. I had to think for a while to come up with that one). That association would never occur to me. These are the sort of folks that look at snowmen, sorry Prime Minister Trudeau, snowpeople, and see “honkies” or white supremacists. (Two eyes made out of coal? Grilling? Barbequed chicken? Ribs? Or, a fossil fuel that could be used to……start crosses on fire?! OMG! I feel faint!).

                Are there any statues, other than those of Rosa Parks or Martin Luther King, Jr., that we shouldn’t remove or tear down? If we are now banishing statues of animals, what will be next? Will we start sand-blasting gargoyles off of historic edifices?

                Let us at least give the verboten statuary a sanctuary of their own. Perhaps we can establish a Land of Misfit Statues, akin to the Land of Misfit Toys in the 1964 television classic “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.” Burl Ives, you left us too soon. There oughta be a statue of you somewhere.

                Hmm.