Mattel recently posted an official video on its official Barbie YouTube page depicting a cartoon version of the iconic doll talking to her black doll friend Nikki about racism. The virtual Barbie noted that “There is a huge movement going on” and that “Millions of people across the world are standing up to fight against racism.” They are doing this, she said, “because too often and for such a long time, people have been treated unfairly, and in some cases even hurt by others, because of the color of their skin.” I assumed she was talking about Black Lives Matter supporters and Antifa members arbitrarily harassing and assaulting white people, but I was mistaken.
Virtual Barbie asked Nikki to talk about the clearly systemic racism she faced as a black doll in America. Nikki told Barbie how she was once stopped multiple times by beach security while on a boardwalk, even though she was “doing exactly the same thing” that Barbie was doing—adding, of course, that Barbie was utterly unharassed. Nikki also bemoaned the “fact” that the instructor of their school’s French honor club once told her she “got lucky” when she got the highest score on the club’s entrance test. To which a saddened and guilty-by-association Barbie replied, “What? You speak French better than all of us! Why didn’t you stay in the club to prove him wrong? Nikki responded, “I don’t want to constantly prove and reprove myself.”
“That means that white people get an advantage that they didn’t earn, and black people get a disadvantage that they don’t deserve!” exclaimed virtual Barbie. She added, “When we don’t say anything, we’re just letting it continue!” Black Dolls Matter!
USA Today, that bastion of journalistic balance and integrity, was effusive in praising the propaganda video, noting it had gone viral, but forgetting to mention that comments for the video were turned off for some reason. (Probably due to systemic racism.)
This, of course, is only the beginning. Look for many more “woke” videos to come, helpfully informing youngsters that everyone in the world besides straight, white, male, cis-gendered Christians is hopelessly screwed. They will talk about how minorities in the United States are doomed to a life of squalor and misery at the hands of the reactionary conservative majority. They will not, however, mention that gay people earn more than straight people or that straight, white, male, cis-gendered Christians are themselves a minority, and a singularly abused one at that.
Nonetheless, I am looking forward to Dora and her friends Alana, Emma, Naiya and Kate lecture Diego and Pablo on misogyny and sexism, with Diego and Pablo accused of “mansplaining” when they attempt to reply. And I can’t wait to hear Barney explain to Baby Bop that dinosaurs “don’t have a chance in this country” due to the rampant—indeed systemic—speciesism.