In the spring of 2015, the student
government at Rutgers University approved a resolution calling for the creation
of more “diverse mascots” at the school, arguing that the current Scarlet
Knight mascot is too white and too male to represent the student body. The
resolution stipulated that the current mascot should be joined by several “additional”
Scarlet Knights who are black, Hispanic, female or third-gender. Perhaps the
“Ebony Knight,” the “Brown Knight,” the “Knight-ette,” and the “Knight of
Indeterminate/All/No/Some Other/Some Others Gender” could take the field with
the Scarlet Knight, thereby terrorizing- or at least confusing the hell out of-
the opposing squad.
But
why stop there? Rutgers could be at the forefront of mascot and societal evolution, boasting of both
a “Good Knight” and a “Bad Knight.” That
would be inclusive. Moreover, they could have their existing “Scarlet Knight”
and add a “Scarlet Day” so the school appears welcoming to fans of darkness and of light- and to very poor spellers.
And
why not a “Silent Knight” in support of those who are mute?
But
this is surely just the start of the coming mascot diversity. Ohio State
Buckeyes? Why not “Doe-eyes?” or “No-eyes?” Oklahoma Sooners? Why not add the
“Laters?” In 2016, are we really to be openly prejudiced against those who may
procrastinate a little? What’s the rush? Too many rush…to judgment! Let’s be more inclusive of those that don’t care to join
the capitalist rat race or oppress the native peoples by stealing their land!
There
are so many opportunities for inclusion and the redress of grievances amongst
college athletic mascots! For another example, the State University of New York
(SUNY) at Albany’s teams are called the “Great Danes.” Would it not be more
inclusive to add a “Not-Particularly-Good Danes” mascot to the mix, or at least
a “Great Peoples Not from Denmark” mascot?
Lock
Haven University’s squads are called the “Bald Eagles.” This is intolerably
insensitive. They need to add a
“Fully-Feathered Eagle” mascot and change
the name of their existing one to “Follicly-Challenged Raptors” immediately.
And
the South Carolina Gamecocks? How
about the Gamehens or the Gameclitorises? This would help counteract the
Patriarchal imbalance inherent in the American system of naming amateur
athletic teams.
There
are several colleges with a “Bulldog” for a mascot. Think how much more
inclusive- and representative of the student body- it would be if they added a
“Bulldyke” mascot in the interest of
diversity!
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