Wednesday, August 20, 2014

What's In A Name? You'd Be Surprised!

                There is a growing demand that the Washington Redskins National Football League club relinquish the use of their nickname of 77 years, as it could be offensive to some Native Americans. President Obama himself has weighed in on the matter, siding with those trying to force the club to change its name. I couldn’t agree more, yet,  after an extensive review  ten minutes of browsing team names across the sports spectrum, I must report that there are numerous other offensive team names that should be changed. Some are offensive on their face, many are non-inclusive, and a few are more subtly demeaning. All are politically-incorrect! The following is a partial list.

                Major League Baseball

*Cleveland Indians…really? “The Tribe”? (This could potentially be demeaning to Native Americans and IT support guys from the sub-continent!).

*Kansas City Royals…well, la-di-da  isn’t this high-brow salute to monarchy a kick in the pants to regular folk. Talk about your ‘one-percenters’. This name must be dropped now.

*Los Angeles Angels (of Anaheim)…typical Orange County Republicanism. Mixing religion and sports is not what our founders intended. Also, do fans really want to believe in something that can’t be seen or scientifically proven. (I mean other than global warming, of course).

*Minnesota Twins…there are no set family norms anymore. One, or three kids are o.k., as well. In fact, childlessness is a great option, too!

*New York Yankees…OMG! White wealthy types that worship business. Those “Damn Yankees”? And with all of the historical connotations? I suppose they wouldn’t just like to play Atlanta in the World Series, but burn it to the ground afterwards, too?! And, speaking of which…

*Atlanta Braves…A little different take on this one. I would’ve thought such overt sexism would  be extinct by now. What about the squaws young Native American women?

*Chicago White Sox…a little too caucasion and clean for my liking.

*Toronto Blue Jays…what about the gray jays, brown jays and green jays? Or even the Steller’s jay or the Pinyon jay? How are they supposed to feel? Criminy!

*Arizona Diamondbacks…well, excuse us! "Saphirebacks" or "Amethystbacks" not good enough for you?

*Chicago Cubs…of course, it’s all about the youth culture. Talk about ageism. “Cubbies”? Yeesh.

*Houston Astros…why not the Elroys or Georges or Janes? Orbitys?

*Milwaukee Brewers…why not Vintners then? Or Distillers? And really, nice to advertise booze across the land, anyway! Was “Crystal -Meth Makers” taken? Perhaps the Milwaukee “Recovering Alcoholics” would be a better fit for our times.

*Los Angeles Dodgers…is this code? Draft-dodgers maybe? Hmm? That would be okay, but just asking.

*Pittsburgh Pirates…this is disgusting. Headband, skull and crossbones…and an eye-patch? Really? This brutal stereotyping has got to stop. No sensitivity here.

*San Francisco Giants…I frankly would’ve expected better from San Francisco. What about the little guy?

*Washington Nationals…I can almost hear the militaristic, xenophobic martial music now! Jingoistic clap-trap from overly patriotic right-wingers to be sure.

San Diego Padres…another case of overt religious favoritism and insensitivity. San Diego “Imams” out of the question, I suppose? It's also appropriation!

                This is just major league baseball! Due to space constraints I will have to issue follow-up reports for the other sports at a later date.

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