CNN Goes To Pot

                CNN sunk to new “journalistic” lows when it helped New Year’s Eve party-goers in Denver get high. CNN reporter Randi Kaye sported large marijuana-leaf earrings during a live report from Colorado’s capital this past Sunday night, as Anderson Cooper and Andy Cohen, hosting the network’s New Year’s Eve broadcast, looked on bemusedly from their perch in Times Square.

                Ms. Kaye was repeatedly seen on air holding actual, lit joints. Online video shows her lighting a bong for a celebrant, and placing a “gas mask” style bong on her face while on a “Cannibus” headed to a “puff, pass and paint” party.

                This bacchanalian blowout may help explain why the network spent parts of three days obsessing over a white truck parked on the side of a road blocking its access to President Donald Trump’s golf outing. “Dude, like, it’s so vital that we get a shot of Trump teeing off, you know? Like he tees off on people of color, women, and, like, those of us in the media, man.” Perhaps walk around the truck or find another access point? “Dude, like that’s rad and all, but I’m too mellow.”

                Many viewers were understandably upset at the ghastly visage of Kaye looking like an Israeli citizen preparing for a gas attack in the Gulf War, when they- and their families- were simply waiting for the ball to drop, 2018 to arrive, and the traditional chance to wish their loved ones a blessed and Happy New Year. Many more were incredulous at the recklessness of the message delivered to their kids.

                Maybe the Cannabis News Network will hire someone named Mary Jane to host next year’s “Bong Show,” aka New Year’s Eve broadcast. Personally, I’ve long since weeded out CNN from my daily- and yearly- viewing.

                President Trump was not just blowing smoke when he dubbed the network “fake news.”

                It now appears they want to be known as “baked news,” as well.