Mars recently announced the release of its first-ever
packs of all-female M&M's.
The candy company says the packages "celebrate women everywhere who are
flipping the status quo." (And flicking the bean.) The new endeavor is
specifically in celebration of lesbians and overweight women. (“Fat positivity!”)
Gabrielle Wesley, Chief
Marketing Officer for Mars Wrigley North America, stated: "The M&M's brand is on a mission to use the
power of fun to create purposeful connections, as we work to create a world
where everyone feels they belong. Women all over the world are flipping how
they define success and happiness while challenging the status quo, so we're
thrilled to be able to recognize and celebrate them – and who better to help us
on that mission than our own powerhouse spokes-candies Green, Brown and
Purple?" Quite.
Mars has even encouraged the public
to nominate women who are in some way "flipping the status quo" for
the chance to be featured on M&M's platforms and receive $10,000 grants to
further fund their progressive performance art.
The historically woke M&M's packs
will be released starting in January, several weeks ahead of International
Women's Day in March.
When will we see a M&M dedicated
to “trans positivity?” (Would a man-to-woman or woman-to-man transition be more
celebrated?) And who wouldn’t welcome a pansexual M&M? What color would
these diminutive confections be? Could the former be one color before one
grasps it and another after? And the latter somehow be every color at once? How
cool would that be?
And what
of other candies in this race to wokeness? “Mr. Goodbar” will have to be
renamed for obvious reasons. “Oh Henry!” Will as well. The former could simply
be rebranded as “Ms. Goodbar” or perhaps “They Goodbar.” The latter could
henceforth be called “Oh, Henrietta!”
“Mike
& Ike” might be okay. “Baby Ruth” could be problematic. “Black Cow” could
be seen as either a tribute to overweight Black women or as an intolerable slur
that must be renamed with all due haste. And the unimaginatively named “Hershey’s
Milk Chocolate Bar” could be renamed to please the LGBTQ community. “Hershey
Highway Bar” it is!
Now that
would be “woke!” And cheeky! And delicious!
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