Announcer: “Welcome
to the Geisha Brands (Mandarin) Orange Bowl 2019! Anyway you slice it, it’s one of the most
prestigious bowls there is…and good for you, too…ha, ha, ha. Keith?”
“That’s right
Bob, and thanks. Now it’s time for the No Doze kick-off. Morning , noon, or
night, you’ll get a ‘kick’ out of No-Doze. Well, Nebraska receives the ball on
their own twenty yard line ready to begin the Milovitz and Associates first
possession of the game. Remember, at Milovitz possession is ninety percent of
the law.
“First down… and
Frazier hands off to his tail-back… and it’s an end -around good for seven
yards. End-arounds during today’s game are brought to you by Hanes. Let us get
our Hanes on you and we’ll turn your
end around.
“Second down and
three yards to go now…Frazier goes to the air and we have our first American
Airlines passing play! When you take to the air,
fly American.
“That pass was
incomplete, which brings up a third and three now for the Cornhuskers. Frazier
takes the snap and…the ball comes loose, it’s on the turf and…when it’s time to
tend to your turf, Snapper lawn
products make the cut. Snapper, a kick in the grass!
“Nebraska
recovers their own fumble…speaking of recovering, if you're drinking too much,
call Al Anon and you could be on your way to recovery.
“Well, fourth
down now and eight to go for the ‘Huskers. And when you need something you ate to go, reach for Ex-Lax,
America’s laxative!
“ Nebraska will
punt here…the kick’s on its way, and what hang time! Smith calls for a fair
catch, and…hey, if you’re experiencing a catch…in your back, neck, or
wherever…give the fine folks at Feldstein Chiropractic a call… you’ll be glad
you did. That’s Feldstein Chiropractic…(612)-555-5554.
“Less than 12
minutes to go now in the first quarter…say, if you’ve got less than twelve minutes to go, grab a phone and call
Miller-Wesson Funeral Homes, they’ll bury your fears, and your wallet.
“I see we’re due for
a commercial break shortly…and speaking of commercials, if your company needs
an ad agency, remember Fallon-McElliot…’we got ads with ‘tudes!’ “
“Stay tuned for
more of the Geisha Brands (Mandarin) Orange Bowl 2019, after this word from our
sponsors…”
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