Taco Bell To Hold "Drag Brunch" Events

 

Taco Bell recently announced that it plans to hold "Drag Brunch" events at several of its restaurant locations around the United States.

The company’s global chief brand officer, Sean Tresvant, issued a press release proudly proclaiming: “We understand the importance of creating safe spaces for the LGBTQIA+ community and are thrilled to provide a unique experience that spotlights and celebrates the wonderful art form of drag and its influence in culture with their chosen families. Taco Bell Drag Brunch was concepted by Live Más Pride, Taco Bell’s LGBTQIA+ Employee Resource Group, which has played a major role in driving awareness of and meaningfully supporting LGBTQIA+ communities both within Taco Bell and the communities we serve and operate in.”

A Taco Bell press release further stated: "Each show will be hosted by the fabulous drag performer and taco extraordinaire, Kay Sedia, and feature performances from local queens and kings that will transform any morning from Mild to Fire! As a brand that brings people together, the Taco Bell Drag Brunch experience is rooted in celebrating the LGBTQIA+ community and creating safe and welcoming spaces for all."

The first event has already taken place, and was held on May 1^st in Las Vegas, fittingly enough. There are also events scheduled this month for Chicago and, oddly, Nashville, Tennessee. Fort Lauderdale, Florida, and New York City will host events in June, which is LGBTQ Pride Month. Still other events may follow.

It seems almost certain that other fast-food purveyors will follow in Taco Bell’s fabulous footsteps. Perhaps McDonald’s will soon host “Pansexual Pride Parties.” I can already hear the marketing slogan: “We’ll put a Big Mac ™ in your hands…and in your mouth. Because we love to see you smile. McDonald’s, I’m lovin’ it!”

Surely, Burger King will soon be hosting “Big Love Banquets” for polyamorous people. “Married to more than one person?” the advertising will query. “If so, you need a Whopper™! Have it your way, at Burger King!”

Kentucky Fried Chicken will soon introduce “KFC for LGBTQIA Days,” during which it will give folks an incredible 69% off of its regular prices if they are queer, bisexual or transgender. The company will promote the events, rumored to be held on the last Wednesday of every month, with the slogan: “We are finger lickin’ good…and so are members of the LGBTQ Community!” Asked how KFC will absorb the loss of revenue, an anonymous source close to the giant fried chicken vendor suggested that the company might decide to charge straight, white, Christian males more to make up the difference.

An industry insider says that Wendy’s is considering hosting special Gay Pride events utilizing the slogan, “Where’s the beef? Right here!”  

The insider also noted that Wendy’s may be in competition with Arby’s, who he said is likely to launch its own Gay Pride events, proclaiming: “We have the meats! Wink, wink!”

Suddenly, I’m not hungry.