NASA is planning on launching nude images into outer space as part of its renewed attempt to
make contact with other intelligent life in the universe, according to a study recently released by the
space agency. (“Other” intelligent life? I would submit that, as evidenced by the
Democratic Party, we have a critical dearth of intelligence here on Earth.)
The transmitted messages will also
include a simple representation of a world map and a diagram about how Earth's
gravity works. Scientists say the message will be written in binary code,
which they believe could be most easily understood by extraterrestrials,
according to the study’s notes. (Oh, oh.)
The study reads: "Though the
concept of mathematics in human terms is potentially unrecognizable to ETI,
binary is likely universal across all intelligence. Binary is the simplest form
of mathematics as it involves only two opposing states: zero and one, yes or
no, black or white, mass or empty space." (So they are sending out nude
images of males and females and nary an image of a non-binary person. Naughty
scientists! Binary is bad!)
In actuality, what is being sent
out in hopes of attracting aliens are essentially just basic anatomical drawings
of a man and a woman. The figures will be shown waving to make them appear more
welcoming—and will be accompanied by a depiction of DNA.
It’s a damn good thing NASA didn’t
decide to send out actual nude photos of, say, Nancy Pelosi, Jerry
Nadler, Joy Behar, or Brian Stelter. Because, if there were intelligent life
out there somewhere, that would eternally guarantee it would never contact us.
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